


Arrowverse Chats!

by goth_gullz



Category: Arrow (TV 2012), DC's Legends of Tomorrow (TV), Supergirl (TV 2015), The Flash (TV 2014)
Genre: F/F, F/M, I have ONE OC, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-11-22
Updated: 2019-08-19
Packaged: 2019-08-27 11:45:25
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 27
Words: 36,255
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16701925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goth_gullz/pseuds/goth_gullz
Summary: the title says it all:)





	1. milk and uh-ohs

lildanvers added directordanvers, brainy, dreamer, lluthor, vasquez, barryallen, iriswestallen, norawestallen, ciscoramnon, caitlinsnow, greatdetectiveralph, olliequeen, felicitysmoak, dinahdrake, laurellance, saralance, directorsharpe, constantine, zaritomaz, charlietheshit, and raypalmer to the chat

directordanvers: the fuck?? a groupchat at 3am in the fucking morning??

lildanvers: hey! there are innocent minds here!

olliequeen: did I mention that alex is the best danvers sister

barryallen: don't worry kara

directordanvers: hey speedy boy, are you too scared of me to not agree?

charlietheshit: I like this one

brainy: Pardon the interruption of sleep good people, but is this what humans call entertainment?

saralance: only if alex is in the chat

vasquez: do you too get paid to say that?

directordanvers: HEY

vasquez: teehee

lluthor: do any of you ever sleep?

felicitysmoak: who

laurellance: sl- what?

norawestallen: never heard of her

greatdetectiveralph: isn't that a sport? I'd never know

constantine: the devil doesn't allow it

lildanvers: what have I done 

dreamer: are you a soundcloud rapper?

zaritomaz: IM-

iriswestallen: I YELLED

directordanvers: I'm crying in this waffle house

directordanvers: she banged her head so hard china could hear it SMH

vasquez: I heard it and I'm ALL THE WAY IN THIS FUCKING BUNKER

directordanvers: susan shut up I'll tell lucy

directorsharpe: I feel bad for whoever works for her.

zaritomaz: um??? ummm??? coming from you?

charlietheshit: the audacity

constantine: are you on crack?

barryallen: it's okay kara

iriswestallen: no sweetie

lluthor: don't listen to alex she only knows how to be drunk gay and mean.

norawestallen: did you steal that from an american horror story apocalypse post on tumblr

lluthor: I have been exposed

dreamer: we suddenly stan lena luthor

lildanvers: DID YOU JUST TRASH LENA? LENA LUTHOR IS NOTHING LIKE HER FAMILY NAME SHE IS AN AMAZING PERSON AND HER WORK IS-

saralance: …..

olliequeen: …..

norawestallen: ……

dreamer: ……

charlietheshit: …….

vasquez: …….

directordanvers: ……..

zaritomaz: that was gay

lildanvers has changed zaritomaz ‘s chat name to zarilovescharlie

ciscoramon: press f to pay respects

saralance: we been knew tho

saralance: f

directordanvers: f

barryallen: f

laurellance: f

felicitysmoak: f

raypalmer: f

norawestallen: f

constantine: f

dreamer: is now the time to say that meant something good

zarilovescharlie: I WONDER

caitlinsnow: killer frost has enjoyed this wild 3am on a tuesday

lluthor: miss zari I'm sorry to continue this but you have yet to change your name back.

charlietheshit: :o

zarilovescharlie: ASDHGJAKDJSJ

zarilovescharlie: bye I'm throwing myself off this planet

norawestallen: YAGA

dreamer: this bitch empty YEET

directordanvers: seems about right

barryallen: wonderful weather we're having

iriswestallen: barry it's dark and cold outside AND 3 AM

constantine: yeah yeah it's the devil's hour now stop YAMMERING AND GO TO BED YOU WANKERS

 

_____________________________

many hours later

 

charlietheshit: who are y'all fuckers anyway

lildanvers: my name is kara! and this is my sister alex, and my best friends lena, brainy, and nia. say hi guys!

directordanvers: wassup

lluthor: hello:)

brainy: Good Afternoon, human.

dreamer: hi!

charlietheshit: ah yes supergirl, her sister, and super friends

lluthor: WAIT WHAT

directordanvers: I stg idiots in love amirite

lildanvers: lena this isn't how I wanted to tell you

lluthor: and when exactly would you have told me?

lildanvers: I- Lena I'm so-

lena and kara both drop their phones, kara immediately rushing to the luthor's side 

directordanvers: damn this group is out of control 

olliequeen: true

directordanvers: wait so who is nora?

iriswestallen: she is our daughter from the future 

directordanvers: damn I can't believe iris left barry for me

ciscoramon: ASJFJFJDHDKAKAK

norawestallen: damn my gf gonna be confused:/

directordanvers: damn uH who's kid is this definitely not mine

saralance: wow alex you really left me and ava for iris ugH the AUDACITY 

directorsharpe: yeah damn ok we see you alex

directordanvers: damn it's so hard having 3 wives

lildanvers: you couldn't even keep your irl one

saralance: bitch what'd you just say

laurellance: wtf

ciscoramon: not cool

olliequeen: wtf has gotten into you kara?

zarilovescharlie: the hell?

directordanvers has left the chat

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> happy thanksgiving to the folk who celebrate it and happy holidays to all!   
> also this sucked, so sorry it is short


	2. teaching the elders

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the youngins teach the elders some present facts + wild! wives

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi this is an early post! happy Holidays

norawestallen: just bought a black fo’ fith

barryallen: when did you get money to buy a gun?

iriswestallen: I just facepalmed so hard

brainy: Happy Holidays, Alex has now beat, as you humans say “the living shit” out of 5 cadets in 2 minutes. Will update later, bye!

saralance: hmmm that's too many cadets, I'm gonna take a trip to 38, I'll be back soon

felicitysmoak: so that's a no on breakfast then

laurellance: wait I thought we were going to breakfast this morning? 

felicitysmoak: I thought it would be nice for you two to talk more:)

olliequeen: like that would've ended good 

avasharpe: you two haven't talked since your father right?

laurellance: yeah, but it's not like I know how to get ahold of her, and also I didn't think she'd want to talk anyways

avasharpe: I get that, she is hard to read

zarilovescharlie: anyone got the new COD

ciscoramon: for ps4?

zarilovescharlie: yeah

ciscoramon: I'll vibe it over

constantine: finally a video game we can agree on

dreamer: so much better than fortnite 

vasquez: don't you still love fortnite tho?

dreamer: don't you still love lucy?

vasquez: fair play

raypalmer: update: alex came back with sara!

vasquez: then who is in char-

vasquez: oh no

vasquez: SON OF A BITCH

directordanvers has joined the chat

directordanvers: wassup fuckers

directordanvers: I called lucy she is in charge for now, good luck susan:)

directordanvers: oh yeah

directordanvers has added generallane to the chat

directordanvers: everyone meet lucy, lucy meet everyone 

felicitysmoak: isn't she the gayer version of lois?

generallane: damn you caught me

olliequeen: wait so what caused kara to go off?

directordanvers: she said she was joking but I'm still pissed

barryallen: understandable 

barryallen: you should come visit us sometime! 

caitlinsnow: please do! we miss you

ciscoramon: me and caitlin need another science qualified person in the labs

generallane: lmao alex is a nerd

directordanvers: I will stab you

generallane: from texas???

iriswestallen: LMAO IS THAT WHERE YOU SAID YOU'RE AT

directordanvers: maybe

generallane: ugh then bitch where you at

directordanvers: another earth?

generallane: ok damn

saralance: leave alex be she's spending quality time with her WIVES

ciscoramon: have I mentioned that I'm shook

generallane: I called it

generallane: where's winn?? he owes me 20 bucks

vasquez: he's in space with a hot alien and mon-ew

generallane: well…. now you owe me 20 bucks

vasquez: ugh fuck me

olliequeen: :)

vasquez: jesus christ oliver

norawestallen: ugh the gays on earth 38 are fun:/ earth 1 is boring

dreamer: we need more heroes over here!

norawestallen: mom, dad, can I go??

barryallen: as long as you're careful 

ciscoramon: I'll breach you to the DEO

directordanvers: take my apartment keys, you can stay there

norawestallen: thank you!

charlietheshit: whoever sent me that bottle of rum, thanks a million

zarilovescharlie: it's an apology present 

charlietheshit: apologizing for making me melt every time you yell at me? ugh keep doing it

olliequeen: ;)

saralance: my mood today

laurellance: ew omg

dinahdrake: my mood for the day too

felicitysmoak: :o

generallane: is everyone here fucking gay

barryallen: *shrugging emoji*

iriswestallen: a possibility 

ciscoramon: once again I AM SHOOK

caitlinsnow: killer frost is surely my gayer side

iriswestallen: I could tell

olliequeen: :o 

ciscoramon: is that all you know how to type?

olliequeen: no I just can't reach everyone's level of texting

dreamer: you're cool

olliequeen: my son says that all the time and I don't know if I should believe him

dreamer: tips to help; watch a 10-30 minute long video under “vines that keep me alive” on youtube and welcome your new self

 

3 hours later

olliequeen: I feel buttered

norawestallen: omg 

dreamer: I see you leveled up

felicitysmoak: ALRIGHT GAYS WHO INTRODUCED OLIVER TO VINE

dreamer: uh-oh

generallane: who even are ya'll people

barryallen: we are friends of alex and kara

olliequeen: and full-time backup heroes

iriswestallen: we're mostly alex's friends cus she talks to us more than kara

caitlinsnow: and she visits us often 

saralance: like now;)

zarilovescharlie: omg stop

saralance: omg you haven't changed your chat name yet

charlietheshit has changed their name to charlieloveszari

charlieloveszari: better love?

lluthor: SHOOK

ciscoramon: lena!

lluthor: I had a trip without service so I missed you losers

lluthor: I don't even know you guys and I missed you

felicitysmoak: we missed you too!

barryallen: can't wait for a problem to appear so we can come together again!

olliequeen: just go back in time barry, that always works

directorsharpe: no! the legends fix that shit all the time, on their own might I add

directordanvers: you know we should really add kate, I have her number

barryallen: do it!

directordanvers has added katekane to the chat 

katekane: hi guys!

olliequeen: kate!

iriswestallen: we've missed you!

katekane: well I'm only in gotham

katekane: also miss alex I heard you're in town, you missing something??

directordanvers: I'll stop by tomorrow! we can get lunch

katekane: good plan

generallane: omg how many heroes are in this chat??

felicitysmoak: all of us technically, me and Iris are mainly just control center though we have no suits

generallane: alex what about you

directordanvers: you'll find out when I get back:) 

ciscoramon: ooooouuuu alex that's why you're going to gotham :>

directordanvers: shhhh

directorsharpe: your leaving us??

directordanvers: yeah sorry, I promised kate to stay for a few days then spend some time at star labs

directordanvers: I'll be back in a few months though!

lluthor: good grief whoever you put in charge is a short little bitch where'd she get her credits damn

generallane: west point ya rich thot

ciscoramon: :o

generallane: so you're the thottie dating my dumbass ex

lluthor: I dumped him months ago

generallane: good

generallane: I heard his sister is dating one of the deo agents so I'm gonna hunt down which dumb bitch would date her

directordanvers: :o

brainy: well everyone knows it is director danvers, I have sadly walked in on their shenanigans.

directordanvers: YOU'RE FIRED

directordanvers: also kelly is nothing like that playboy vigilante

barryallen: don't talk about oliver like that

olliequeen: shut the fuck up

saralance: no! one of my wives are cheating!

directorsharpe: :o

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you haven't already, please follow my twitter for updates! @married_sanvers


	3. the axeman attacks!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the gays team up!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok so I went back and changed this because I forgot like a warning, as you can tell ya'll is in there alot and I usually rarely use it the way it's meant to be used. so just deal!

directordanvers: kelly broke up with me

saralance: suddenly I love my wife again!

directordanvers: askjskjskjsksjsk

barryallen: why did she dump you

directordanvers: well everything mostly 

directordanvers: I don't wanna talk about it

norawestallen: hey there was a short biker chick at the door like an hour ago and I told her you were out of town

directordanvers: ……

directordanvers: wow the world really wants me to die

zarilovescharlie: come back to the waverider

charlieloveszari: yeah we could play cod!

generallane: she's gotta get her ass back to HER job

directordanvers: sadly yes:(

norawestallen: does that mean I gotta go?

directordanvers: nah you can stay

saralance: john you're in charge for now

constantine: bullocks

zarilovescharlie: oh no

directorsharpe: sorry I won't be able to come alex, gotta watch the idiots at the time bureau

directordanvers: no biggie

directorsharpe: tsktsk you're taking my wife from me

directordanvers: sorry hun

lluthor: thank god you're back alex

directordanvers: luthor really missed me that much??

lluthor: yes

generallane: and she comes to my office JUST to complain 

directordanvers: you took MY office??

generallane: you ain't here

saralance: she is now

brainy: bye bye miss lane

generallane: I have taken role as co director so this ain't the end of me!

directordanvers: that wasn't an option when j'onn was director 

generallane: maybe he just didn't tell you HMMMM 

saralance: it won't look like murder alex, I promise 

dreamer: ASDFGHJKLGHDSAJKSLA

generallane: you'd never be able to kill me

brainy: sara lance: formerly dead, former member of the league of assassins, former member of team arrow, know as white canary, miss lance is a highly trained assassin and professional with weapons and hand to hand combat, formerly known as ta-er al-sahfer. present time: captain of time traveling group “legends”, captain of time traveling ship the waverider, and girlfriend of time bureau director ava sharpe.

saralance: and your credits?

brainy: lucy lane: former director of the deo, former lawyer, currently general of the u.s. army's JAG corps

generallane: I WAS NICE TO YOU BRAINY

directordanvers: my wife is better than you

generallane: apparently she can kill me AND I WON'T KNOW

lluthor: please do it

generallane: ugh we had fun last night lena!

olliequeen: :o

raypalmer: I forgot this chat existed 

charlieloveszari: with your phone going off every two seconds???

raypalmer: I just beat assassins creed:/

constantine: shut up raymond

directordanvers: lucy did you kill susan??

vasquez: sadly no

barryallen: whipped

vasquez: SHUT UP YOU SLOW ASS UGLY ASS BARTHOLOMEW HENRY ALLEN STINK ASS

dreamer: who understood a word she said please translate 

barryallen: how do you know my full name :o

vasquez: you're in the deo records like everyone else

generallane: wait you're that flash dude from a couple years ago

barryallen: you're that mean underground boss lady

lluthor: I wheezed 

directordanvers: alien bar tonight @ 8 ya'll it's a friday ya'll got no reason to miss it

saralance: and if you do you'll be stabbed

zarilovescharlie: does this apply to earth one kids

lluthor: sorry only exceptions to nora and sara

katekane: shit alex ya had me in a 3 day long nap after that party 

directordanvers: that selina girl knows how to party it was all her

katekane: that's true 

katekane: have you tried out the suit?

directordanvers: not yet, but me nora and sara are gonna patrol the streets today 

saralance: ugh that means I gotta wear the mask doesn't it 

directordanvers: or you ain't partying

directordanvers: today national city gets a new named hero

katekane: too bad I won't see you suit up 

 

4 hours later

dreamer: what is your name alex

olliequeen: um????

dreamer: LIKE YOUR IDENTITY NAME

directordanvers: nightwing :)

lluthor: hot 

iriswestallen: :o

katekane: national city's newest vigilante 

norawestallen: hell yeah!

saralance: I actually missed the mask

laurellance: I miss the whole suit:/

dinahdrake: laurel no

laurellance: laurel yes

dinahdrake: NO

laurellance: fine

felicitysmoak: teehee

dinahdrake: felicity if you make her a new suit

felicitysmoak: I won't!!

barryallen: :o

iriswestallen: how'd ya'll do? any crime?

norawestallen: yeah then the ncpd showed up but alex choked

saralance: shhhhh child

generallane: LET'S GET WASTED GAYS

norawestallen: let's gho-ho-ho

barryallen: I think they're bad influences 

greatdetectiveralph: I'm the definition of bad influence!

saralance: mick is a bad influence 

charlieloveszari: he knows it

lluthor: damn nia is a lightweight 

zarilovescharlie: BORING

generallane: leave it to the big gays hun

lluthor: damn alex vs lucy shot contest

norawestallen: alex wins!!

directorsharpe: wives coming in clutch 

generallane: sara vs lena in pool let's get this W

norawestallen: sara wins!!

lluthor: you cheated!

norawestallen: that makes it 2-0 with alex and sara leading the contest!

saralance: alex vs lucy in darts let's get this bread

norawestallen: TEAM ALEX AND LUCY WIN!!

directordanvers: HAD TO DO IT TO EM

directorsharpe: alex give sara a kiss for me please!

dreamer: yuck

generallane: you stinky gays cheated!!

saralance: YA'LL FELL FOR OUR FOOLERY 

norawestallen: frank ocean is the greatest rapper try me!!

katekane: iris you raised her right!

iriswestallen: yes I did

saralance: nora you're shut down for drinks

norawestallen: nooo!

generallane: the bartender won't give her anymore

norawestallen: yhis bhar suucks

lluthor: for the sake of nora I think we should call it a night

saralance: where'd alex go?

generallane: I'm not sure

lluthor: saw her go to the bathroom

generallane: I'll go get her ya'll go to her car

saralance: WE CAN'T IF SHE GOT THE KEYS

generallane: I said GO TO THE CAR not GET IN fuckin dumbasses 

saralance: you won't even know:)

barryallen: :o

ciscoramon: shook

caitlinsnow: my night was entertaining 

barryallen: you never put down your phone??

caitlinsnow: I know

directordanvers: I'm back

generallane: well we're going home have fun

saralance: doubt it

norawestallen: teehee

directordanvers: take her phone sara omg

felicitysmoak: DON'T TEXT AND DRIVE ALEX

directordanvers: damn ok ok

iriswestallen: wait they're all drunk

dinahdrake: smh

saralance: we're home safe and nora is passed out on the couch!

iriswestallen: after ALEX put her in danger

directordanvers: hey I am the law

generallane: I can arrest you for fun

directordanvers: you drove to your apartment drunk too

caitlinsnow: illegal activity happening 

directordanvers: we're going to bed!

barryallen: night!

olliequeen: goodnight folks

zarilovescharlie: goodnight you law breaking dummies

katekane: night loves!

an hour and no sleep later

saralance: who was here at 2 in the fucking morning 

directordanvers: the axeman!

norawestallen: great now I'm not gonna sleep for the rest of my trip

directordanvers: teehee

laurellance: alex do you ever answer questions 

directordanvers: who

laurellance: omg

saralance: damn I swear she's seeing someone behind mine and ava's back

directordanvers: :|

 

fast forward 7am monday

norawestallen: can we get breakfast this morning 

directordanvers: yeah let's go to noonans

saralance: alex please hold my hand the axeman might get me :,)

directorsharpe: yeah alex protect our wife :)

directordanvers: this day can't get worse

generallane: you should see the after look of nia she looks like she was resurrected 

constantine: dear I've seen the after look of a resurrection, the hangover look is nothing 

generallane: is that dude another person to watch myself with??

olliequeen: yes

directordanvers: AND THINGS JUST GOT WORSE

directordanvers: and she thought I was dating sara omg TAKE MY LIFE

saralance: who was it that you gotta freak out about?

directordanvers: I don't want to talk about it

norawestallen: hey who is that short biker lady to you??

directordanvers: john can you please sacrifice me to the dark lord

constantine: sure

lluthor: wait is the short biker lady maggie?

saralance: OH

directordanvers: she asked if we could talk after work so I'm gonna be home late, just order out or something 

saralance: are you sure you want to go?

directordanvers: yeah I've been meaning to reach out and now is my chance

olliequeen: so she's the one kara was talking about

directordanvers: yeah

barryallen: good luck! invite us to the wedding. or don't, you know our luck with weddings 

iriswestallen: oh don't even bring that up

saralance: I met my 2nd wife because of your wedding!

directordanvers: ah yes

generallane: bank robbery on 37th delwood street, supergirl is in metropolis so alex nora sara, saddle up

saralance: on it 

norawestallen: that's right the good guys take a W

directordanvers: we out here saving lives

generallane: good job team

lluthor: I see you guys!

zarilovescharlie: does this mean we're not getting sara back anytime soon?

generallane: we're keeping her, ya'll can have alex

katekane: damn I wanted dibs on alex

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> how was it? better than the last two? hopefully. I wrote different times during today and tbh I forgot to write characters and it's hard to keep up like I forgot Ralph! so I'm gonna have to cut back on writing some characters in. and yes omg I'm writing in maggie which is gonna add to my pile of characters but I'm up to it! and Kara will be back I just have no creativity to be nice with her. anways thanks for reading again!


	4. nora aka the pro at finishing your rap related sentence

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> kara is back! people have disappeared again! mess!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay okay I'm so sorry for not posting this but posting my other story. I took a break from this to work on the other so now tonight I finished this chapter, then I'm going to keep working on chapter 4 of flirting is a friend thing. and I have a new story(I know) coming soon I'm still writing it but I'm heavily debating it. have fun!

directordanvers: tis a wonderful day!

charlieloveszari: are you on crack

directordanvers: ashdjsjakajs

barryallen: did your talk go well?

directordanvers: we're gonna try and be friends 

generallane: huh alex you never even told me you were gay, I had to learn from these NERDS

ciscoramon: hey!

ciscoramon: YOU WANNA FIGHT

generallane: get over here I'll whoop your ass

saralance: STOP IT IDIOTS

saralance: tbh I miss my powers 

dinahdrake: take laurel's 

laurellance: oh babe, the scream will never go away:)

olliequeen: SHOOK

norawestallen: damn this chat never changes

barryallen: NORA

norawestallen: YeAh DaD

iriswestallen: she gets it from me:))

zarilovescharlie: damn are dinah and laurel really a thing?

dinahdrake: damn are you and charlie really a thing?

charlieloveszari: hey don't talk to her like THAT

dinahdrake: proof

laurellance: did you just openly mention our relationship?

dinahdrake: who

laurellance: ALEX LOOK WHAT YOU TAUGHT HER

directordanvers: sara they bullying me:,)

dinahdrake changed their name to captaindrake

captaindrake: canary vs canary lets go sara

saralance: ok bet

captaindrake: pool?

saralance: I never lose to anyone 

directordanvers: except me

generallane: YOU CHEAT BITCH

lluthor: YOU A CHEATER

norawestallen: CHEATER

captaindrake: ok BET, alien bar @ 8 I'll be there

directordanvers: I'll set up a house 

olliequeen: we're all coming

directordanvers: I'll set up a cabin

brainy: I have that taken care of, director danvers

directordanvers: good

directordanvers: also sara there is an empty apartment down the hall from mine, you an ava should take it for when you visit

saralance: that sounds great, also get your ass home 

directordanvers: ugh ava come get your girlfriend 

directorsharpe: I'll be there after I finish my paperwork

raypalmer: I'll do it ava!

saralance: GET OVER HERE

directorsharpe: coming!

directordanvers: does that mean I still have to come home?

directorsharpe: YES

saralance: YES

norawestallen: ya'll remember me? you know barry and iris's kid who CURRENTLY LIVES ON YOUR COUCH ALEX

directordanvers: of course I do SINCE WE WENT TO BREAKFAST THIS MORNING 

norawestallen: we drank early

directordanvers: you and sara drank early

barryallen: bad influences I say

saralance: pipe down bartholomew

olliequeen: what happened to caitlin, cisco, ralph, and vasquez

dreamer: lucy killed them, well vasquez at least 

generallane: FRESH LIES

directordanvers: vasquez is sick and caitlin hasn't answered my texts so idk

generallane: can't believe ya'll tried to say I killed susan how DARE some of ya'll are probably killers HUH SPEAK UP

olliequeen: I was in prison for killing bad guys

laurellance: AND I GOT YOU OUT

barryallen: I was falsely accused 

saralance: yeah I've killed people, and that's bad?

iriswestallen: technically me and caitlin killed savitar, well killer frost

caitlinsnow: and I've never actually killed someone the name was cisco's idea!

ciscoramon: RUDE

laurellance: I've killed some people 

captaindrake: and I forgave her for it

laurellance: of course because of my cute face right?

captaindrake: sure babe

saralance: don't roast those genetics! I got the better side of course

directordanvers: um ya'll we've all killed people like bad or not we did tho?? don't say you didn't cus earth x BITCH

greatdetectiveralph: I wasn't there bitches hah!

norawestallen: neither was I

barryallen: true

olliequeen: how many times has reverse flash came back and you haven't killed him barry?? HUH

norawestallen: :o

iriswestallen: nora what's that supposed to mean

saralance: you think these politics matter but shawty clearly they don't 

laurellance: I'm biflexual debit or credit YUH

iriswestallen: I'll sell you a fuck to give but I just ran out of it

directordanvers: we LOVE the queen of WOC rappers

norawestallen: ugh kehlani step on me

olliequeen: I just started legacies and josie and penelope got me feelin sum type of way

dreamer: OLIVER “THE ICONIC DAD” QUEEN

felicitysmoak: am I the iconic mom?

dreamer: who are you

directordanves: DSJJSJSJSJAJSJ THAT'S MY GIRL 

directordanvers: ok but seriously like are kara cisco caitlin and vasquez dead?? they quiet yet still in the chat

katekane: they dead for sure

ciscoramon: kara is your sister you should know???? also sorry we just got back from earth 2

 

\----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

lildanvers: sorry for looking like booboo the fool guys

directordanvers: its good kar

saralance: ASJFJALLALA BOOBOO THE FOOL 

lluthor: hi uh gays only event at my club tonight please be there in fancy attire

saralance: alex smells good

norawestallen: GUCCI COLOGNE

directordanvers: by chance can I get an iced out benz truck for the night

lluthor: yes but you have to bring a date

directordanvers: so many hoes in my face I could pick one

norawestallen: MAKE IT POP LIKE A ZIT HUH

directordanvers: why do you keep doing that

norawestallen: you keep quoting songs

saralance: who all from earth 1 is coming to the club tonight other than ava

captaindrake: me and laurel are coming

norawestallen: idk if I can get a date

dreamer: I'll go with you!

iriswestallen: have I met you??

dreamer: um no..?

iriswestallen: alex is she mom cleared

directordanvers: yep!

iriswestallen: I trust your judgment

generallane: fetus gays, cute.

directordanvers: ugh true

saralance: I can't even think about that omg

olliequeen: you were so small back then!

saralance: shut the fuck up oliver!

lluthor: alex the benz should be outside your apartment

directordanvers: thanks luthor!

saralance: tune in tomorrow to see our drunk, dead, gay asses!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry this is under my standards of 1000 words and it is kinda rushed and I'm a bad writer.   
> check out my tumblr @ blue-impulse   
> also should I post my spotify playlist in here so y'all know what plays EVERY time I write? it's what causes Nora's references.  
> so I'll decode em  
> the little bit sara and laurel quoted were rich girl mood by dounia and kehlani  
> (it was rarely anything but) gucci cologne by k$upreme  
> "pop it like a zit huh" roses by benny blanco juice wrld and brendon urie   
> also expect another rap reference bc iced out benz truck baby!


	5. fLaShBaCkS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> ollie is delicate + some news + new people

laurellance: my girlfriend is a lightweight:/

saralance: same with mine

norawestallen: laurel you look stunning in that suit!

dinahdrake: its my favorite

dinahdrake: to take off of her

felicitysmoak: glad to see that the chat is back to normal!

saralance: omg tmi that's my sister

olliequeen: from another earth might I add

saralance: and that changes anything?

olliequeen: yep I'm gone

directordanvers: where'd nora and nia go

ciscoramon: get some!

barryallen: CISCO

ciscoramon: I meant laurel….

vasquez: i know how to get her

vasquez: i know that these perkys finna hurt me

norawestallen: TELL ME ARE THEY WORKING

generallance: predictable

caitlinsnow: sorry I can't make it to the club tonight alex!

directordanvers: you're good! we can just catch up another time.

caitlinsnow: I'd like that

greatdetectiveralph: I thought it was a gays only event

felicitysmoak: HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

iriswestallen: AHDJAKKALALAL HE SAID WHA-

saralance: THAT'S SOME FUNNY CONTENT

greatdetectiveralph: …….

ciscoramon: in this essay I will

caitlinsnow: you know I'm pan ralph

greatdetectiveralph: hell yeah you're a great cook!

dinahdrake: HAHAHA THE STRETCH GOT JOKES

olliequeen: even I know this and y'all call me oblivious ollie

laurellance: im WHEEZING

olliequeen: also thea wants in the chat can she join?

lildanvers: sure!

speedyqueen joined the chat

directordanvers: damn lena y'all need to host gays only events more often 

speedyqueen: A GAYS ONLY EVENT AND I WASN'T INVITED HUH I SEE

laurellance: dinah HONEY

felicitysmoak: well you aren't in town and it's on kara's earth so we didn't think

speedyqueen: so it's not only a gays only event but it's on another earth and the world's most beautiful woman is in attendance??? BITCHES

generallane: actually I had to work so I'm not there

speedyqueen: wh-

directordanvers: well the party doesn't end for another few hours….

speedyqueen: on my way

olliequeen: I thought it was sibling bonding night and you get to meet emiko?

speedyqueen: fuck that and miss a chance to get super drunk and possibly have sex with a danvers? not missing this.

laurellance: damn she's even gay on this earth

speedyqueen: ***bi

laurellance: still

speedyqueen: are you like the old laurel?

laurellance: depends 

speedyqueen: you and dinah are together right?

dinahdrake: we sure are

speedyqueen: is she good in bed?

dinahdrake: very

speedyqueen: that's all I need to know ALEX WHERE Y'ALL AT

felicitysmoak: I don't know if I should even think or ask about what feeling I just got….

saralance: I felt it too

felicitysmoak: so the question is… did what we think happened, happen?

olliequeen: god please don't put that thought into my head

 

__________________________

 

norawestallen: I can't feel my body

directordanvers: I warned you that speedster drink was more powerful than cisco's

ciscoramon: I was out-scienced ??? by what wizard

brainy: me

brainy: I believe we met during your guy's so called “annual crossover”

ciscoramon: oh yeah! you're the one who ripped out amazo's motherboard!

brainy: indeed

directordanvers: oh don't remind me about that, considering I wasn't invited 

barryallen: you were technically there, still a badass btw

olliequeen: that's right she almost beat the shit out of you!

barryallen: almost.

directordanvers: seems about right 

speedyqueen: well I completed my quest

felicitysmoak: and that was…???

speedyqueen: I got super drunk and had great sex

barryallen: last night didn't you say you wanted to bang al- oh.

charlieloveszari: damn that's an accomplishment 

olliequeen: I'm gonna bleach my eyes 

brainy: you humans are… weird…

barryallen: yeah we are..

norawestallen: wait that's why I wasn't allowed in

directordanvers: yeah sorry nora

saralance: don't worry, when you locked her out to have sex, btw nice bag, me and ava happily took her in

generallane: who'd alex fuck now

iriswestallen: hmmm not too bad you could've done better

speedyqueen: alex is now otherwise occupied 

olliequeen: ….

speedyqueen: cooking breakfast 

dreamer: I had a great time last night nora!

norawestallen: I did too! I'd like to do it again some time, not drunk though.

iriswestallen: IM SORRY WHAT

saralance: ???

norawestallen: OMG MOM NOTHING HAPPENED 

iriswestallen: good though she is a better choice than spencer

norawestallen: who said I stopped talking to spencer?

iriswestallen: give me a heart attack please

norawestallen: we've only been on dates mom..

iriswestallen: you do know she is the same age as me right?

norawestallen: yeah…..

saralance: YOU'RE DATING SOMEONE THE AGE OF YOUR MOM

norawestallen: WE'VE BEEN ON 6 DATES WE AREN'T DATING 

saralance: fair

barryallen: be careful with her nor

norawestallen: i will

saralance: good parenting, now what are the plans for the rest of our time here

directordanvers: well dinah is going to “intern” at the deo for a little and help me with cases so her and laurel might be here a little 

saralance: i wish i could stay long

directordanvers: i get it, you have to get back to your team, and so does ava

directordanvers: I'd have the same problem 

saralance: damn I love you danvers

directordanvers: love you too lance

directorsharpe: am I being left

saralance: no babe we're getting closer to the lucky 3

laurellance: omg

directordanvers: you ain't getting close to nothing lance

lildanvers: hey clark wants to join the chat he said he has news!

olliequeen: finally a sane man

manofsteel joined the chat

barryallen: hi clark!

charlieloveszari: nate?

manofsteel: who

iriswestallen: that icky haircut dude does NOT compare to clark

norawestallen: omg IT'S SUPERMAN! that's so shway! you're legendary!

manofsteel: ah I see how she is your daughter barry

barryallen: there's only two things

iriswestallen: she has my skin color excellence

directordanvers: ugh preach

manofsteel: alex! how are you?

directordanvers: I'm great! how is Lois and the mini you?

manofsteel: that's one of the reasons I'm here actually..

lildanvers: did something happen???

manofsteel: well it's hard to explain but after lois gave birth we went to argo city, and when we were flying back, there was an incident.

manofsteel: we ejected our sons pod because we knew we wouldn't make it and he got lost in space. It was only two weeks for us, but it was 14 years for him.

lildanvers: did conner get stuck in the same place as me?

manofsteel: we're not sure, but he is home now. and he doesn't fit in anything 

directordanvers: that's exactly how it went when you brought kara to us

olliequeen: is there anything we can do clark?

manofsteel: any uh boys clothes? we need to have a teenager shower

manofsteel: if you have anything you can send it to kara, we're coming to national city

felicitysmoak: we were actually coming to your earth so we'll just bring them with us

olliequeen: yeah, and conner can meet our son, fast friends hopefully 

manofsteel: the funny thing is he takes after a certain one of his aunts

lildanvers: really??? I'm so happy!

manofsteel: actually he is just like alex

directordanvers: who me

manofsteel: he's quite the punk, black everything, lynyrd skynyrd this barenaked ladies that, ripped jeans leather jackets….piercings… and colored hair. also he uses ALL OF MY GEL!!

lildanvers: please don't mention that… im- I'm having flashbacks.

laurellance: i like this kid already

saralance: so is that bad boy gonna corrupt william is the question

manofsteel: you should add your son, and I'll add lois and conner

olliequeen: chat please keep it...less crackhead-ish

saralance: we act no such way!

olliequeen added williamofqueens to the chat

felicitysmoak: he just got home from europe!

williamofqueens: thankfully 

manofsteel added thebetterlane and cksteel to the chat

lildanvers: lois!!!

thebetterlane: kara!

directordanvers: hmmm I'm always ignored 

saralance: maybe you should be more social alex

directordanvers: fu-

lildanvers: ALEX NO

thebetterlane: hi alex!

generallane: the army suddenly wants me back

lluthor: DAJSKAKKAKAKA

manofsteel: is that a luthor??

thebetterlane: hello lucy, long time

brainy: miss lane it appears that you were honorably discharged 8 months ago and you have been a lawyer for catco the past 4 months

generallane: thanks brainy..

generallane: hi sis

manofsteel: once again is that a luthor

thebetterlane: pipe down smallville

manofsteel: as you can see conner clearly takes after his mother

cksteel: lmao

thebetterlane: and clearly you hit your head too much

williamofqueens: damn sick burn!

olliequeen: bad influences I say, bad influences 

thebetterlane: he has your attitude ollie

olliequeen: why does everyone keep calling me that 

laurellance: it's uh idk your name??

olliequeen: I give up

manofsteel: and y'all said conner would corrupt william

cksteel: corrupt? you must mean guide.

williamofqueens: please do both

cksteel: oh I will:)

directordanvers: control yourself

lildanvers: if he's anything like you he would have done something by now

directordanvers: motherfucker

felicitysmoak: :o

olliequeen: alexandra please meet me in the deo training room

directordanvers: finally I can beat your ass

 

1 hour later

 

saralance: ollie not only has a bruised face and ribs, he has a bruised ego

caitlinsnow: I'm guessing alex won

felicitysmoak: she KICKED HIS ASS

directordanvers: what happened to 7 years of training and experience oliver?

williamofqueens: it went down the drain as soon as you stepped into that ring

olliequeen: im-

generallane: it was very entertaining 

directordanvers: after that ass beating I just handed out, I'm gonna go get coffee

speedyqueen: I'm coming with you

____________________

 

generallane: alex what I just found in your apartment im-

saralance: oh no she found the piss drawer 

directordanvers: WHAT I DON'T HAVE ONE

generallane: bad boy huh?

directordanvers: OH NO NOT THAT

directordanvers: PLEASE JUST DON'T SAY ANYTHING 

iriswestallen: now I'm interested SPILL THE TEA LUCY

generallane: one word

generallane: KPOP

laurellance: you are officially kicked out of the punk group

directordanvers: but red velvet…..

iriswestallen: female kpop is actually good tho?

dreamer: that's true! fuck the men!

norawestallen: redmare usa 2019 baby!

directordanvers: well nia, nora, you hid my secret for no reason I guess

directordanvers: also lucy why were you in my apartment???

generallane: sara said you were hiding something and I really wanted to prove to brainy that you have a piss drawer, I'm disappointed

brainy: I will always believe in you director

directordanvers: thank you brainy. now back to my COFFEE

katekane: I see this chat never changes

cksteel: oh look kara it's your wife

lluthor: WHO

manofsteel: once again is that a luthor??

lluthor: clark you know who I am

thebetterlane: lena hi!

lluthor: hi lois!

williamofqueens: are me and conner the only kids here

saralance: yes

katekane: I'd add the bat kids but that's….

lildanvers: I love them

katekane: as they love you 

directordanvers: couple goals

lluthor: alex…..

directordanvers: yea leen?

lluthor: shut the fuck up

directordanvers: do I need to deliver yet another whooping

lluthor: I'd like to see you try

directordanvers: PULL UP

olliequeen: im having flashbacks

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi folks I'm back! ikr finally. I'm so sorry that I haven't updated ANYTHING, school is really fucking me up and the 5 fics I'm working on is just adding to it. anyways if y'all wanna talk hmu on kik @Agent_Canary and tumblr @blue-impulse I have a dinahsiren social media au and yes that hasn't been updated either... see y'all next update!


	6. rest easy luke perry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> meet the batfam bitches!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this chapter is dedicated to luke even though it's not related. I'm really gonna miss him and I hope his family is well

lildanvers created lgbt vigilante morons

lildanvers added directordanvers, dreamer, vasquez, norawestallen, caitlinsnow, captaindrake, laurellance, saralance, directorsharpe, constantine, zarilovescharlie, charlieloveszari, generallane, katekane and speedyqueen to the chat

lildanvers: thank me later

lildanvers has left the chat

constantine: I'm a warlock not a vigilante love

directordanvers: is this because she can't handle us

generallane: she's kara, of course she can't handle us

norawestallen: this isn't fun without everyone else tho:/

laurellance: true I wanna bully the straighties

dreamer: “straighties” AHDJSLAKSJAK

saralance: wtf kara

zarilovescharlie: uncool dude 

dreamer: so unradical bro

norawestallen: not schway

caitlinsnow: have any of you seen that killing eve is coming back

dreamer: I'M SO EXCITED 

directorsharpe: I miss sandra in grey's tho

laurellance: ugh that show fucked me up

laurellance: calzona deserved better

dreamer: I mean they might be fine now tho

dreamer: cus remember arizona before moving back told callie that she missed her so hMM

laurellance: let's just HOPE 

captaindrake: yeah let's hope at least one gay couple gets their happy ending on that damn show

vasquez: I hope schmiko stays together

dreamer: shit same

directordanvers: shit can't get worse

laurellance: what's wrong

 

arrowverse chat!

felicitysmoak added emikoqueen to the chat

directordanvers: oliver get your sister to SHUT THE FUCK UP

emikoqueen: I literally just got here

directordanvers: not YOU

olliequeen: what is thea doing

speedyqueen: ugh how dare you

speedyqueen: I'm just talking to your lovely ex about how much you miss her

directordanvers: WHAT

directordanvers: KILL MYSELF KILL MYSELF KILL MYSELF 

dreamer: someone kick thea from the lgbt vigilante moron chat

iriswestallen: that's a tongue twister

directordanvers: it's not dummy

iriswestallen: thea you fucked alex up

speedyqueen: yeah like twice sober and four times blasted

olliequeen: im gonna….

cksteel: why is aunt alex beating the shit out of computer alien dummy..?

brainy: …..hElP….

dreamer: BRAINY

emikoqueen: this chat is a lot more wild than felicity said

vasquez: how many problems you got

norawestallen: A LOT

vasquez: how much money you got

norawestallen: A LOT

laurellance: make a band already losers

lildanvers: um why did I just receive a phone call from brainy yelling and crying hysterically

olliequeen: thea did it

speedyqueen: uM I DID NO SUCH

cksteel: I witnessed that mess hehe

brainy: I think I was in a better viewING 

directordanvers kicked speedyqueen from the chat

directordanvers: the evil is rid

constantine: still here love

emikoqueen: and I thought being in a groupchat of superheroes would be boring

directordanvers: great now I'M BUSY TONIGHT 

felicitysmoak: with what

thebetterlane: yeah with what

directordanvers muted lildanvers

directordanvers: me and my ex are going to get drinks

felicitysmoak: oh shit

iriswestallen: wait that sawyer chick?

directordanvers: yeah maggie

katekane: wait

katekane: detective maggie sawyer??

directordanvers: going ✈ oven

saralance: 👀👀👀👀

saralance: let's not talk about this anymore 

lluthor: why'd you mute kara

directordanvers: kara doesn't like maggie anymore

directordanvers: even after the million times that I've told her it was me not her

lluthor: she arrested me once but I don't hate her

olliequeen: seems like a sibling thing

saralance: I'd hate dinah if her and laurel broke up even if it was laurel who did it

laurellance: as would I hate ava

directordanvers: thanks..?

olliequeen: I'd hate anyone who broke my sisters heart 

emikoqueen: good to know

katekane: sorry alex!!

directordanvers: it's okay kate

 

batfam chat

katekane: y'all remember alex

jasontheman: supergirl's sister?

casscain: the hot butch chick?

katekane: uh yeah..

katekane: anyways

katekane: she just mentioned her ex

hungryhungryharley: ooouuu she's available?

drisley: you're mine har

oracle: AHDKSLALAK 

katekane: she was engaged to maggie…..

dickthedick: uh oh

timnotturner: you have something in common now SCREW HER

oracle: no I'm team superbat!!!

katekane: wh-

drisley: wheelchair has a point

oracle: fuck you

dickthedick: kids calm the cussing

oracle: I'm 15 dickface

katekane: why did I even bother

hungryhungryharley: hey boy wonder! we ain't all kids!

spoilergoesbrrrrrr: I love gay drama

dovenotthesoap: it's better than the straight bullshit I deal with

wondergirl: true

oracle: shut the fuck up you idIoTs are PRACTICALLY ON TOP OF EACHOTHER 24/7

dovenotthesoap: don't expose us like that

dovenotthesoap: but I do have to deal with hank BREATHING down my neck 24/7

itshelenbitch: kill him already

jasontheman: I wanna meet alex now

timnotturner: I heard she beat the shit out of oliver

katekane: how do you know???

timnotturner: william told me

jasontheman: oh yeah your nerd boyfriend

timnotturner: he's not my boyfriend douchebag

katekane: stop your insults and I'll add you guys to the chat

jasontheman: SI MOMMA BAT

 

arrowverse chat

katekane: I'm so sorry for what is about to happen 

directordanvers: ?????

katekate added jasontheman, dickthedick, timnotturner, oracle, hungryhungryharley, drisley, dovenotthesoap, wondergirl, itshelenbitch, spoilergoesbrrrrrr, and casscain to the chat

jasontheman: alrighty folks which one of y'all is that pretty ol’ butch lady momma bat been talkin bout

dreamer: have you played too much red dead or something??

jasontheman: SOMEONE UNDERSTANDS 

directordanvers: kate am I the butch lady?

katekane: …..yes

olliequeen: is that the whole fucking batfam…….

saralance: OLLIE

felicitysmoak: OLIVER THERE ARE CHILDREN HERE

olliequeen: I'm moving

wondergirl: I need photo evidence that alex is pretty

vasquez: [image attached: meanbosslady.pic]

timnotturner: you are very pretty miss danvers

directordanvers: you're now my favorite batfam member

jasontheman: um pardon you haven't met me yet! 

jasontheman: ohhoho you haven't met me yet

timnotturner: your drunkenness does not compare to my politeness

directordanvers: I like you both eh?

katekane: that was literally the worst thing you could've done

timnotturner: WAR

jasontheman: jason todd, pleased to beat you.

oracle: WHY ARE JASON AND TIM FIGHTING

dickthedick: the trouble you started alex..

itshelenbitch: I like alex, she seems cool

olliequeen: where is my SON

felicitysmoak: he's with conner??? you literally suggested that he go do something productive???

saralance: wow great parenting OLLIE

laurellance: yeah dumbass

itshelenbitch: oliver??

olliequeen: helena?

katekane: you know eachother?

itshelenbitch: he trained me

itshelenbitch: and a bit other things too

itshelenbitch: and laurel??

laurellance: who

captaindrake: babe that's your name

laurellance: asdfjkflaka not what I meant but ok

olliequeen: she's not the laurel you know

itshelenbitch: then wh-

saralance: our laurel but more gay and mean

itshelenbitch: I dig it

captaindrake: she's mine

laurellance: yeah sorry but I'm only soft for this moron

captaindrake: *heart eyes emoji*

casscain: heart eyes mothafucka

dreamer: AKDJAKAKKAK

olliequeen: bad influences 

katekane: PUH-LEASE THEY'VE NEVER MET Y'ALL 

directordanvers: ollie still has a hole from where his ego is supposed to be that's why he's being a little bitch

jasontheman: HAHAHAHA

manofsteel: william wants to stay the night is that ok

olliequeen: sure

manofsteel: I was talking to felicity not the little bitch

olliequeen: im- I'm leaving 

felicitysmoak: DAJSJJAAJJAJAJ

itshelenbitch: wait oliver has a kid?

itshelenbitch: not a surprise

iriswestallen: playboy vigilante billionaires amirite

katekane: true

dickthedick: ohhoho don't think just cause you're a woman that doesn't apply to you kate

emikoqueen: entertaining

laurellance: wish our gays only chat was this exciting 

lildanvers: y'all don't use it???

directordanvers: it's boring without the bullying of the hets

iriswestallen: we cool tho right

directordanvers: hell yeah queen!

felicitysmoak: what about me?

vasquez: eh somedays

directordanvers: we are accepting newbies please say I if you want in the lgbt vigilante morons gc

dovenotthesoap: I

wondergirl: I

drisley: I

hungryhungryharley: I

timnotturner: I

emikoqueen: I

directordanvers: yeeHAW

 

lgbt vigilante morons

directordanvers has added dovenotthesoap, wondergirl, drisley, hungryhungryharley, timnotturner, and emikoqueen to the chat

directordanvers: WELCOME 

directordanvers: also we don't care if you're gay or not just as long as you're tolerable

directordanvers: NOW intros seems fit since a good 75% of us has not met

dovenotthesoap: well I'm dawn

wondergirl: I'm donna

drisley: I'm pamela

hungryhungryharley: howdy ladies n gents imma harley

timnotturner: I'm tim

emikoqueen: emiko

directordanvers: well I'm alex which most of you know I guess

dreamer: I'm nia and it's great to meet you all!

generallane: this is gay

vasquez: shut up lucille

vasquez: I'm susan but you can call me vasquez

norawestallen: I'm nora as y'all prob figured 

zarilovescharlie: I'm zari and this is charlie

charlieloveszari: cheers

captaindrake: I'm dinah

laurellance: I'm laurel

saralance: I think they can guess our names by well uh our names

captaindrake: you sound just like your sister

laurellance: well babe I hate to break it to you…

timnotturner: don't worry this chat will be GREAT

dreamer: have y'all seen rent??

dovenotthesoap: the new one? cus that was GAY

timnotturner: lAdiEs

dreamer: hey mister

dovenotthesoap: she's my sister

timnotturner: i love them

 

later that day in the arrowverse chat

jasontheman: alrighty WHO PUT ACTUAL MILK INTO MY LACTOSE FREE MILK

oracle: you have the shits don't you lmao

jasontheman: MY GUTS ARE RIPPING APART 

directordanvers: I have lactose free milk in my fridge 

jasontheman: I'm cOmInG

norawestallen: wow alex is a big softie 

directordanvers: I'll pummel you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back folks! hopefully here to stay too. also my heart is BROKE that arrow is ending but I do know it's probably because oliver is gonna die but who knows I could be wrong. anyways comment what kinda spinoff you'd like to see. personally I'd like a birds of prey type cause I wanna keep seeing Dinah and Laurel.  
> anyways hmu on tumblr @ blue-impulse


	7. she's mIsSiNg

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> someone goes missing + new peeps

felicitysmoak: great news everyone!

thebetterlane: congrats!

olliequeen: i- how-

thebetterlane: it's called be a parent oliver

jasontheman: I'm sorry but some of us aren't so what's the news

felicitysmoak: I'M PREGNANT!!

lildanvers: omg congrats!

iriswestallen: I'm freaking out!

caitlinsnow: congrats felicity!

 

lgbt vigilante morons

laurellance: come on gays we need to beat the hets in news

saralance: YEAH

norawestallen: or we could leave them be??

timnotturner: sacrilege

directordanvers: laurel quick get DINAH PREGNANT 

laurellance: I- UH- UM- GOT IT

dovenotthesoap: godspeed

norawestallen: how?

dovenotthesoap: how what?

norawestallen: i- uh- nothing 

saralance: think GAYS THINK

directorsharpe: i say we let them be happy babe

saralance: hmmmm OKAY

timnotturner: I have it

katekane: WHAT 

directordanvers: say it to the chat!

 

arrowverse chat

timnotturner: I have news

iriswestallen: are you pregnant?

timnotturner: bruce has returned with his son

katekane: oh wait I knew this

barryallen: what's so important about bruce

olliequeen: barry you are the dumbest most oblivious person in this chat. AND MY NAME IS OBVIOUS OLLIE

lildanvers: shut up oliver you refuse to believe batman is real because he was a vigilante before you

katekane: yeah bruce was really wildin before you 

barryallen: what does bruce wayne have to do with batman

jasontheman: quick who gon tell him

iriswestallen: babe…

barryallen: tell me what

barryallen: iris are you?

directordanvers: yes

iriswestallen: WHAT NO

laurellance: BRUCE WAYNE IS BATMAN YOU DUMB SPEEDSTER 

barryallen: mean lady

spoilergoesbrrrrrr: did you really not know?

barryallen: ……

barryallen: no

directordanvers: me and brainy are going on a mission we'll be back soon

katekane: bye alex

saralance: bye lexie:)))

dreamer: lexie grey?

norawestallen: she does kinda look like lexie grey but with short hair

jasontheman: I see it

dickthedick: yeah same

constantine: who's gonna tell them

charlieloveszari: shhhh the 4th wall shouldn't be broken

 

hours later

 

lildanvers: alex and brainy haven't come back yet

lildanvers: felicity can you hack alex's phone and see who she last called and texted

felicitysmoak: sure

felicitysmoak: her last text was your mom and her last call was someone named “M”

casscain: is this pretty little liars

emikoqueen: DASHDJAKAKA

saralance: m for maggie?

lildanvers: hUH

laurellance: SARA

iriswestallen: oh sara….

lildanvers: they've been talking?

lildanvers: and why does the whole group know but not me

saralance: now ain't the time now add the hoe and let's get sum answers

 

lildanvers added detectivesawyer to the chat

 

lildanvers: hi maggie we have a problem 

generallane: yeah that rich dumbass won't give me no love

olliequeen: not the time LUCY

detectivesawyer: did something happen to alex?????

lildanvers: her and one of the deo agents went on a mission and they haven't come back

detectivesawyer: …….

detectivesawyer: not again

saralance: have you seen her or did she say where she was going?

detectivesawyer: last time I saw her was last tuesday, and she didn't say where she was going when we talked.

olliequeen: you said not again, has she gone missing before?

lildanvers: yes, two years ago she was kidnapped by someone we went to school with 

olliequeen: I assume they are locked up?

detectivesawyer: yes

laurellance: last time I saw alex was this morning at the apartment 

captaindrake: she drove me to the precinct at noon.

norawestallen: I saw her yesterday at the deo

jasontheman: she was deadass just here

generallane: the mission her and brainy went on wasn't deo stated so I have no idea where they went

vasquez: mean boss lady is in charge now alex better come back

generallane: I'll beat your ass susan

lildanvers: CAN WE STAY ON TOPIC FOR ONCE IN THIS FORKING CHAT

felicitysmoak: I hacked that tracker of hers, I would be able to decode it if she was on another earth. but I think she's in a different dimension

ciscoramon: yeah we haven't explored that far…

detectivesawyer: the multiverse theory is true?

ciscoramon: duh! a majority of us are from earth 1

detectivesawyer: wow…..

barryallen: sorry but nora won't be helping with the search and I'm gonna stay out too

lildanvers: what's wrong barry?

barryallen: just family drama it's nothing 

iriswestallen: I'll do what I can do kara

saralance: great we just lost two speedsters

saralance: wait

 

saralance has added kidflash to the chat 

 

saralance: wally we need your help

ciscoramon: wallace the man!

kidflash: what's up guys

saralance: alex and one of her agents went missing 

kidflash: I'm in

detectivesawyer: he's already here too im-

dickthedick: wally??

kidflash: dick?

iriswestallen: going✈ off topic once again

dreamer: ALEX IS MISSING IT'S NOT TIME FOR GAY TEA

manofsteel: wait alex isn't missing

saralance: SPILL IT STEEL BOY

manofsteel: I asked her and brainy to go to another earth for me

lildanvers: CLARK WE ARE WORRIED SICK

manofsteel: well brainy should've told lucy…..

generallane: i threw a stapler at him the last time i saw him……

detectivesawyer: ARE YOU DUMB

generallane: a possibility 

thebetterlane: no it's a fact

generallane: shut up lois

manofsteel added kaldur-drama to the chat 

manofsteel: hey did alex make it to you guys?

kaldur-drama: yes mr kent, she has been here for a while

lildanvers: is she okay????

kaldur-drama: of course she is, why wouldn't she be?

lildanvers: we thought she was missing

kaldur-drama: no, she will be back soon

kaldur-drama: so this is the chat she was telling us about 

lildanvers: telling who

kaldur-drama: my friends

kaldur-drama: may I add them?

manofsteel: of course kaldur'ahm

kaldur-drama has added blueboy, impulse, and cassiethesnark to the chat

manofsteel: hey guys!

cassiethesnark: uncle clark!

blueboy: hey clark!

impulse: woah is this interdimensional texting??!!!

manofsteel: yes bart

impulse: awesome!

manofsteel: oh barry is gonna enjoy this

manofsteel: barry where you at??

iriswestallen: he's busy with nora

manofsteel: oh he found out didn't he

iriswestallen: you knew???

manofsteel: yes but only because of bart

iriswestallen: who's bart

impulse: me!

iriswestallen: bart….. the name….. 

iriswestallen: is this another future kid?

impulse: grandkid actually 

impulse: so you know my aunt nora?

iriswestallen: AUNT?? HOW MANY KIDS DID WE HAVE

impulse: only two, my aunt nora and my dad don

iriswestallen: was don born after nora?

impulse: no they're twins

impulse: wait did he not come with auntie nora to your timeline?

barryallen: oh great more future stuff to freak out about

impulse: so you just found out who nora was working with? 

barryallen: unfortunately 

impulse: grandpa was a bad man but he was kinda helping her in that situation 

barryallen: grandpa?

caitlinsnow: if this is where I think it's going we need to get out of here

impulse: yes my grandpa eobard, he died before I was born thankfully

barryallen: your father was married to a thawne???

impulse: yes

impulse: just let nora tell her side though

impulse: she was being used and manipulated, he made her think what she was doing was right and that it would help

iriswestallen: wait does nora know about don??

impulse: she didn't know until he showed himself to her, I'm over saying things I need to stop talking

blueboy: you always talk too much bar

impulse: i know

lildanvers: family drama is….. worse than mine

barryallen: talk about it… gtg

impulse: did I say too much uncle clark?

manofsteel: no, you're okay bart

impulse: cool

lildanvers: can we get some intros real quick 

kaldur-drama: my name is kaldur'ahm

blueboy: I'm jaime

impulse: I'm bart

cassiethesnark: I'm cassie

manofsteel: wait isn't donna in this

wondergirl: yes, I'm usually lurking

manofsteel: meet wonder girl 2.0

cassiethesnark: hi!

wondergirl: are we related?

cassiethesnark: I'm an amazon so probably

dovenotthesoap: wait don't say that

dovenotthesoap: that would mean all the amazons are related 

dovenotthesoap: and I know sum of ur girlies be fucking

cassiethesnark: in that case we might be because of our genes, better?

dovenotthesoap: much better

cassiethesnark: how do you know donna?

dovenotthesoap: she's my fuckbuddy:))

wondergirl: girlfriend****

cassiethesnark: man you gays are straightforward 

saralance: you mean gay-forward

laurellance: shut up sara

katekane: alex better hurry back we need to FUCK

detectivesawyer: i-

jasontheman: my name is jason peter todd and I live in the wayne manor, if I go missing please arrest katherine kane thank u very much. gays I'll miss you

spoilergoesbrrrrrr: AHAHAHAHAHA

timnotturner: HE RIPPED HER WIG OFF AHHHHHHH

dickthedick: full disclosure maggie, alex and kate are not ‘fucking’ she just got attacked by asshat over there

jasontheman: shut up dickhead

dickthedick: the dick jokes aren't funny anymore 

jasontheman: fuck you

casscain: can I do my work IN PEACE

dickthedick: batmom jason is cleaning money with cass

jasontheman: fUCKING SNITCH

katekane: jason don't make me do it

jasontheman: you wouldn't

katekane has added brucieboy to the chat

jasontheman: FUCK THAT RAT

brucieboy: I raised you jason

jasontheman: kate did a better job raising me and she was in the military

cksteel: BURN 

manofsteel: conner not now….

brucieboy: clark????

manofsteel: hi bruce…

brucieboy: it's been so long! how've you been?

manofsteel: um terrific

brucieboy: did you ever score a date with that reporter you were melting over?

thebetterlane: hi bruce

brucieboy: who's the bad lane then?

generallane: apparently me

manofsteel: we're married now

brucieboy: married? congrats

cksteel: and he has a kid AHEM

brucieboy: congrats clark!

manofsteel: thanks

brucieboy: I'm guessing something super happened and he speed grew?

manofsteel: something like that, it's not fun with a 15 year old

brucieboy: 15 MINES ONLY 7 

manofsteel: yeah he takes after his aunt

generallane: not this one though

lildanvers: yeah alex is on another earth rn

manofsteel: kara! I've heard so much about you

lildanvers: good I hope

olliequeen: it's always good

saralance: literally not a bad thing has ever been said about you

barryallen: is that batman…..?

laurellance: yes you dumb speedster 

barryallen: FIRST OF ALL RUDE

barryallen: second of all OLIVER YOU SAID HE WASN'T REAL

ciscoramon: it was for the sake of his ego, because the hood wasn't the first vigilante on earth one boohoo

olliequeen: cisco SHUT UP

brucieboy: is this a superhero groupchat

saralance: basically 

directordanvers: and I'm back!

lildanvers: THANK RAO

saralance: ALEXANDRA MARIE DANVERS YOU HAD US WORRIED SICK

directordanvers: my middle name isn't marie

saralance: we only fucked 4 times alex how am I supposed to know

laurellance: man y'all didn't lesbian uhaul mid-bang?

saralance: you and dinah literally live together

hungryhungryharley: and they were roommates 

timnotturner: oh my god they were roommates 

laurellance: we were together in secret DUMMY

barryallen: dinah what's wrong with your girlfriend calling people dumb

captaindrake: she's gay and mean but I love her

brucieboy: woah there is that harley quinn

hungryhungryharley: hiya there brucie!

brucieboy: I- how-

katekane: her and pam work with us

brucieboy: ok

caitlinsnow: some of us are reformed villians bruce

directordanvers: that was sassy, killer frost is that you?

caitlinsnow: hi lexie;)))

ciscoramon: 👀👀👀 also gay chat let's get it

saralance: you ain't even in it

ciscoramon: I will get the tea eventually 

blueboy: add me and bart pls:)))

 

lgbt vigilante morons 

saralance has added blueboy, impulse, detectivesawyer, and kidflash to the chat

laurellance: thanks for scaring us alex

directordanvers: you care?

captaindrake: of course she does, she just doesn't like to show it

laurellance: babe you exposed me:/

saralance: new gays expose yourselves

blueboy: me and bart are together but we don't want the rest of our team to find out

saralance: we won't tell

detectivesawyer: shit sorry, I've been trying to transition back to the science division 

captaindrake: I can understand that

detectivesawyer: thanks for helping me today 

captaindrake: anything for a friend of a friend 

saralance: alex have you like not noticed 

directordanvers: what

generallane: she's dumb gay and mean don't expect her to realize it until she's passed out and wakes up in the middle of the night realizing it

directordanvers: I'm confused 

generallane: HAHSHAJAJAJ

detectivesawyer: don't bully her she's under pressure 

directordanvers: thanks

directordanvers: anyways laurel did you really drink all my whiskey 

laurellance: you left for another earth, of course I did

kidflash: glad you're back alex!

impulse: great uncle wally!

kidflash: what

saralance: save your time and check the other chat

lluthor: the party is cancelled this friday I have business 

laurellance: WHAT

directordanvers: I'VE BEEN WAITING ALL WEEK

dovenotthesoap: Y'ALL BETTER BE JOKING LUTHOR

lluthor: I have a business trip

directordanvers: party at my place I guess

dovenotthesoap: don't you have a big building for that?

directordanvers: you mean the deo?

dovenotthesoap: yeah that

directordanvers: that's a black-ops government facility 

dovenotthesoap: then how come I know about it 

directordanvers: I-

directordanvers: you're not wrong

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading! kudos and comments would be a blessing! hmu on tumblr @ blue-impulse


	8. they have another whaaaat

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> intro: my longtime OC

lgbt vigilante morons

emikoqueen: Have y'all ever wanted a girl with thick thighs to just SUFFOCATE you before

directordanvers: all day every day

generallane: you used to have a girl to do that to you alex

directordanvers: kelly never did it

generallane: not her

directordanvers: sara technically never did it

saralance: “technically”

generallane: DAHDHAKAKK not her

directordanvers: uhhhh none of the others ever did that

generallane: not even maggie?

katekane: lucy SHUT UP

directordanvers: well um if it's so important to you, yes

detectivesawyer: my finest moments

saralance: ok she really hasn't realized 

directordanvers: what

directordanvers: o wait

directordanvers: LUCY WHY'D YOU MAKE ME SAY THAT

detectivesawyer: DAHSJAKAKK it's okay alex I knew deep down I was the only one

dreamer: wait alex I thought that caitlin did that 

directordanvers: lucy you're fired

generallane: NIA SAID IT NOT ME

directordanvers: well I don't work at catco so I can't fire her

dreamer: wow thanks:)))

caitlinsnow: how dare this militant dummy say that

laurellance: DAJDHAKKAKA you got KF off lucy

generallane: why is it suddenly snowing 

generallane: it's literally spring and WASHINGTON STATE 

saralance: lucy you done messed up

generallane: what's that supposed to mean

caitlinsnow: did I scare her enough?

directordanvers: yes, thank you killer frost

caitlinsnow: anything for you lexie

dovenotthesoap: what

dovenotthesoap: killer frost should have her own phone and place in the groupchat 

caitlinsnow: she agrees

wondergirl: GIVE HER ONE

directordanvers: #givekillerfrostaphone2k19

 

arrowverse chat

directordanvers: #givekillerfrostaphone2k19

ciscoramon: fine……

ciscoramon added killerfrost to the chat

killerfrost: I feel included

directordanvers: it's what you deserve 

killerfrost: oh hi alex;)))

olliequeen: is it really what we deserve 

barryallen: it's what killer frost deserves, not you

laurellance: dummy

olliequeen: RUDE

 

hours later

 

emikoqueen: someone take me out tonight

laurellance: come to earth 38 and we can all go

emikoqueen: who do I gotta sleep with

laurellance: alex

emikoqueen: deal

directordanvers: GAYS ONLY PARTY BACK ON

directordanvers: Y'ALL GOT NO REASON TO NOT GO IT'S A FRIDAY 

directordanvers: alien bar @8

timnotturner: damn I wish I could go

directordanvers: YOU'RE COMING

brucieboy: I'm pan can I join

katekane: if he's going I'll go

directordanvers: EVERYONE COME

iriswestallen: even me??

directordanvers: only if barry gives you a free night

barryallen: WHAT NO

barryallen: NEVER

iriswestallen: i wanna GO

saralance: LET HER HAVE IT 

barryallen: …….

barryallen: fine

iriswestallen: I'M PACKING UP FROM WORK

directordanvers: barry don't get butthurt It's not like I'm gonna fuck your wife or anything 

cksteel: OOOOOOUUUUUU

vasquez: GET SUM

generallane: alexandra the lesbian frat boy danvers has been activated

zarilovescharlie: that's top class

norawestallen: I deadass just got killed by someone on rainbow six siege named bigdaddyrambo

saralance: DASJSHAJAJJAJAJ IM-

emikoqueen: summoning circle hope it works  


emikoqueen: oops was that not in the gay chat

constantine: summoning circles don't work like that unless you want a demon

emikoqueen: as long as she has thick thighs

detectivesawyer: mood

directordanvers: oh hey mags, are you coming tonight?

detectivesawyer: I wouldn't miss it 

saralance: uwu

saralance: also I'm coming alone tonight lexie

directordanvers: something wrong?

saralance: me and ava are just taking a….breather

felicitysmoak: NOT THE OTP

saralance: it's just a break

directordanvers: hi um…. I'm sorry to break the news but there is a family emergency so I uh can't have a party tonight 

saralance: are y'all okay?????

dreamer: omg

lildanvers: uh yeah, we're heading to midvale rn. chat later

olliequeen: I hope they're okay

generallane: finally they're finding out 

saralance: finding out what?????

 

hours later

 

lildanvers: well…..

iriswestallen: WELL WHAT

directordanvers: WE HAVE ANOTHER SISTER

saralance: WAIT SERIOUSLY 

generallane: we been knew

directordanvers: oh shut up

laurellance: what did lucy and your sister fuck or something 

generallane: are you a telepath????

generallane: we were in the military together

olliequeen: ADD HER

lildanvers: ugh the gays are gonna fight over her

 

lildanvers has added bigdaddyjax to the chat

 

lildanvers: I'm so sorry you have to experience this jax

saralance: her name is literally big daddy, she wants it

bigdaddyjax: ou want what

laurellance: sum good pussy? yes ma'am 

bigdaddyjax: sounds about right

saralance: we need you to introduce yourself that's the one rule

bigdaddyjax: y'all want my whole life story? it's kinda easy to tell lmao

iriswestallen: do tell

bigdaddyjax: well uh my name is jackson, jax for short

bigdaddyjax: when I was born some people called cadmus took me and did experiments on me

brucieboy: we love a superheroes upbringing

bigdaddyjax: I have these powers which alex told me that some of you have

lildanvers: COUGH COUGH sonic scream

bigdaddyjax: uh when I was 5 my dad got me out and sent me to an island

olliequeen: please don't be what I think it is

bigdaddyjax: it was called lian yu and I was taken in and trained to be not only an assassin but a witch

constantine: ah yes earth 38's league of assassins 

bigdaddyjax: johnny boy! how's my brother doing?

constantine: better than you I hear

bigdaddyjax: for sure for sure

bigdaddyjax: then when I turned 18 I joined the airforce, and I'm part of the black ops squad

generallane: don't get on her bad side

lildanvers: moral of the story: don't f*ck with jax we were training earlier without kryptonite and she beat the living hell out of me :/

saralance: are you strong enough to defeat thanos

bigdaddyjax: I'll shove my foot up that grapes ass and he'll be done

dreamer: do you too follow meme lantern corps

bigdaddyjax: yea!

brucieboy: so you're a member of the league?

bigdaddyjax: and you're a shit father

brucieboy: take it your earths bruce was way different?

bigdaddyjax: well considering that I legally own one of his own blood, yes

jasontheman: WAIT WHO

bigdaddyjax: jason…..?

jasontheman: two questions; alive or dead, boyfriend or brother 

bigdaddyjax: dead brother

jasontheman: was the entire batfam there with you?

bigdaddyjax: uhhh 

katekane: he should've said, who were you friends with on the island, like a family maybe

bigdaddyjax: well there was jason, dick, tim, little damian, steph, cass, and then thea. they were who I considered family. oh and nyssa and talia

timnotturner: this is wild

olliequeen: did you say thea???

bigdaddyjax: uh yeah

olliequeen: was I there

bigdaddyjax: who are you

olliequeen: what was her last name 

bigdaddyjax: merlyn

bigdaddyjax: her and her dad had me fooled most of my life unfortunately 

lildanvers: let's talk about something happier!

saralance: wait how did your name not pop up in records

bigdaddyjax: my name was changed when I joined the league and when I joined the air force 

laurellance: what was your name?

bigdaddyjax: ja'as al ghul

saralance: nyssa would get a CRACK outta this

bigdaddyjax: she's still alive on your earth???

saralance: I assume a lot of the people you know are dead

bigdaddyjax: uh

barryallen: damn she's darker than any of us

olliequeen: at least this chat isn't as dirty as usual 

laurellance: hey donna how many times have you ate dawn out today?

wondergirl: well I've been eating it like panini 

wondergirl: so about 6 times today but it's only noon

olliequeen: DON'T Y'ALL WORK OR SOMETHING 

wondergirl: my workplace is our loft

olliequeen: in a dirty way?

wondergirl: no dumbass I'm a photographer 

laurellance: HEY DON'T CALL HIM THAT

laurellance: it's my line

williamofqueens: I see the chat is the same

cksteel: seems about right 

bigdaddyjax: do any of ya'll work

directordanvers: I'm at work

saralance: we have no emergencies 

olliequeen: same here

captaindrake: I'm just aiding

detectivesawyer: I'm on break

detectivesawyer: also how about lunch alex?

directordanvers: sure, our usual?

detectivesawyer: sounds great

emikoqueen: I need a gf

bigdaddyjax: same

generallane: jax has a daddy kink

bigdaddyjax: uh that was random 

felicitysmoak: is it true

bigdaddyjax: I guess

bigdaddyjax: oh kara are we still on for lunch

lildanvers: of course j

laurellance: of course daddy

saralance: yes daddy

dovenotthesoap: why can't we go anywhere daddy?

dreamer: DADDYKINS O DADDYKINS

bigdaddyjax: i-

lildanvers: she's flustered guys

lildanvers sent a photo [cmr:flusteredmeanlady]

iriswestallen: WAIT THAT'S JAX

iriswestallen: no wonder girls call you daddy….

barryallen: IRIS

iriswestallen: LOOK AT THOSE MUSCLES, THE TATTOOS 

lildanvers: jax is like 6'3 I literally can't stand near her now

bigdaddyjax sent a photo [cmr:selfie]

charlieloveszari: she looks like a real punk

bigdaddyjax: I'm usually the mafia type but ok I'll take it

laurellance: you kinda look like a mob boss

bigdaddyjax: being a lawyer ain't easy

laurellance: wait so you have a canary cry but you're also a lawyer?

bigdaddyjax: JAG in the air force, lawyer part time at the NCPD

detectivesawyer: wait so you're the one who beat the shit out of the rookie this morning right

bigdaddyjax: yes ma'am 

detectivesawyer: yep you're definitely alex's sister 

bigdaddyjax: so I heard y'all like to party

laurellance: hell yeah

bigdaddyjax: well party is my middle name

generallane: your middle name is jackson

saralance: wait wait wait so what's your first name

bigdaddyjax: I'd tell you, but I'd have to kill you

saralance: do it daddy pwease

bigdaddyjax: suddenly I have to work

generallane: I'm the only one who knows hehehe

directordanvers: I'M HER SISTER

generallane: I've seen what she can do I'd rather not

laurellance: lucy is scared LMAO

vasquez: HAHAHA

generallane: you're fired

vasquez: I- alex she can't do that right

directordanvers: don't listen to her

dovenotthesoap: hey as rent for staying in this chat

dovenotthesoap: jax you have to send a selfie every morning and night

bigdaddyjax: ok bet

wondergirl: and it has to be every time we say

laurellance: no matter where you are!

bigdaddyjax: is that short for you want nudes 

wondergirl: yes

dovenotthesoap: as a couple; yes

iriswestallen: I wouldn't mind if one or seven popped into my messages 

barryallen: IRIS

iriswestallen: AS A WOMAN

laurellance: DAHSHDKAKA

dovenotthesoap: send them to the lgbt chat

iriswestallen: COUGH COUGH sArA send ThEm COUGH COUGH 

bigdaddyjax: y'all wild

laurellance: we know what we want

norawestallen: jax do you play rainbow six seige?

bigdaddyjax: hell yeah

norawestallen: oh what's your gamertag, I'll add yah

bigdaddyjax: bigdaddyrambo

saralance: wait

olliequeen: now that's funny

norawestallen: you killed me the other day

bigdaddyjax: omg what a coincidence

bigdaddyjax: I'm a great player, maybe I can teach you sometime?

norawestallen: I'd like that

iriswestallen: get some

barryallen: I'm done asking I'm just gonna go to the bathroom and cry

olliequeen: don't be a baby barry, you have an adult daughter. shes gonna fuck someone sometime

barryallen: I WAS QUOTING BROOKLYN NINE-NINE DON'T PUT THAT IMAGE IN MY HEAD

 

directordanvers has added speedyqueen to the chat

 

directordanvers: I forgive

speedyqueen: luv u lexie

directordanvers: love you too now

olliequeen: thea!

speedyqueen: alrighty what is it

olliequeen: what can't I be a good brother

emikoqueen: dashdhakakak

speedyqueen: hey emiko

emikoqueen: hey thea, back in town?

speedyqueen: only for a little

emikoqueen: shame

speedyqueen: so I heard there is another danvers sister that I can hit on

bigdaddyjax: oh GREAT

bigdaddyjax: it's not easy being a snack

dovenotthesoap: JAX WE NEED YOUR DAILY FEE

bigdaddyjax: I'M IN THE SHOWER 

wondergirl: even better

bigdaddyjax: I-

bigdaddyjax: kids close your eyes

 

manofsteel has blocked cksteel and williamofqueens from seeing attachments 

 

manofsteel: alright men don't open it

bigdaddyjax: y'all really thought I would send nudes

bigdaddyjax sent a photo [cmr:postshowerabs]

speedyqueen: I-

dovenotthesoap: WOAH THERE

laurellance: buckaroo…

captaindrake: I'd ride that

jasontheman: HOLY

generallane: slow down cowboy

iriswestallen: im-

felicitysmoak: HIAJSJAKKAKA

olliequeen: ok I have to admit

katekane: she beats me in the tattoo area:/

saralance: she beats me in the scar area

lildanvers: she beats me in the height area

brucieboy: oliver “i have to admit” queen

manofsteel: sassy

brucieboy: I thought that's how you like em clark?

thebetterlane: lmao

manofsteel: what's so funny

thebetterlane: oh sweetie I know

manofsteel: know what

cksteel: are you kidding HE DOESN'T EVEN KNOW

brucieboy: it was a great week

barryallen: “great week” ok I'm INTERESTED 

laurellance: explain 

manofsteel: we had a fling when bruce came to earth 38 ALRIGHTY

lildanvers: I didn't think you had it in you

manofsteel: what I'm bisexual

lildanvers: I meant the balls to sleep with a billionaire playboy

manofsteel: fair

 

later that night

 

bigdaddyjax: since y'all were dirty to me earlier imma interrupt your sleep

felicitysmoak: jokes on you we never sleep 

bigdaddyjax: or work apparently 

laurellance: I'm trutuieja to hase ses herhen

captaindrake: yeah people

saralance: I see who the pillow princess in the relationship is

captaindrake: It doesn't offend me

norawestallen: ride with the mob

bigdaddyjax: alhamdulillah

norawestallen: HEY THAT'S MY JOB

iriswestallen: so jax when are we gonna meet you in person

bigdaddyjax: we should have a girls game night instead of just game night

lildanvers: YES

directordanvers: that'll work considering james and brainy are the only ones who come

directordanvers: girls night; karas apartment every Wednesday at 7

iriswestallen: I'm in

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for reading! I keep trying for more words so that has to do with how long it takes me to write.
> 
> tumblr @ blue-impulse


	9. chill out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> girls night! plus an interlude

directordanvers: why is my sister better than everyone 

directordanvers: brainy: “I have suit for you” jax: “nah bro I make my own”

bigdaddyjax: he literally showed me something with a SKIRT

bigdaddyjax: so I skrted outta there

norawestallen: I see what you did there

bigdaddyjax: plus I make suits better than dumb computer boy

brainy: thank you

bigdaddyjax: np

saralance: so are you gonna show us the suit or what

bigdaddyjax sent a photo [cmr:bigbird]

ciscoramon: please don't tell me that's your name

bigdaddyjax: no it's red bird

ciscoramon: thank god

constantine: don't thank that icky man

 

directordanvers to caitlinsnow

 

hey cait I need some help

what's up lexie?

jax has this demon inside her that she can't control 

and you need killer frost to talk to her?

maybe?

I can do that

thank you sm

anything for you

 

girls run the world

 

lildanvers: can't wait to see you all tonight!

felicitysmoak: I'm so excited 

iriswestallen: I literally couldn't sleep last night

zarilovescharlie: finally I can get off of that ship and have some fun

gideon: excuse me ms tomaz

zarilovescharlie: I mean-

saralance: gideon you should go into your human form and come with us

lildanvers: the more the merrier 

gideon: all though the offer is tempting, someone has to watch those idiotic men we call our teammates 

charlieloveszari: preach

lildanvers: you're still invited

gideon: thank you ms danvers, but I have to decline

wondergirl: we're coming!

wondergirl: only if dawn would hurry up

dovenotthesoap: watch it girl wonder

drisley: me and harley will be there

captaindrake: laurel will be there before me, I have some paperwork to finish

detectivesawyer: I'll be there!

caitlinsnow: me and frosty are on our way

killerfrost: there better be alcohol 

directordanvers: I'm here, of course there will be

bigdaddyjax: your bartender has arrived and she's buzzed as per usual 

saralance: are you talking in third person?

bigdaddyjax: yes

directordanvers: did you drive high?

bigdaddyjax: I'm only buzzed

lildanvers: and she was not buzzed

bigdaddyjax: I can handle my toxicities 

saralance: “toxicities”

katekane: I drive up and see a classic muscle car

katekane: I'm speechless 

bigdaddyjax: she's my baby

wondergirl: what all is it?

bigdaddyjax: it's a 1967 shelby GT500 super snake classic with present technology

saralance: how fast?

bigdaddyjax: 165 mph

laurellance: I'm gonna faint when I see it

dovenotthesoap: how many rideable things do you own

bigdaddyjax: depends 

speedyqueen: me and emi are on our way up!

lildanvers: THE FACE JAX MADE AHDHAKAK

lildanvers sent a photo [cmr:thefaceyoumakewhensomeoneyouusetoramshowsup]

laurellance: THE NAME OF THE PIC

dovenotthesoap: you and thea used to ram

bigdaddyjax: on my earth, yes

bigdaddyjax: but I wouldn't put it like that

speedyqueen: why'd earth 38 me stop ramming you

bigdaddyjax: she left and joined the legion of doom then came back and tried to kill me

speedyqueen: ok damn

iriswestallen: jax I'm ready to meet you

bigdaddyjax: too bad you have a husband 

iriswestallen: yeah..

lildanvers: jax you're not going home with any married women tonight

bigdaddyjax: if he don't treat her pussy right then maybe I should

iriswestallen: she's not wrong

lildanvers: I'm telling barry

iriswestallen: 🤷♀️

speedyqueen: my pussy ain't being treated right

directordanvers: treat it yourself 

felicitysmoak: AHDHSKAKK

laurellance: the competition has arrived

generallane: I haven't gotten there what you talking about 

directordanvers: I'm so excited to see y'all!!!

 

interlude

 

Kara swore that the cops would come, but luckily they never did. Everyone sounded like they were being murdered, screaming and everything. 

You know the phrase when push comes to shove? That's what described that room, except there was a lot of booze. 

So the party was going great. Jax got up to have a smoke; she tried to step over Laurel and ended up toppling on top of Emiko, and the group burst into drunken laughter. 

“Ah look Jax on top of a woman, I see that sight 24 fricken 7.” Lucy pointed out. Jax laughed and sat up, “Yeah but usually you were the one on the bottom.” Jax's statement got ooh's from the crowd of wiley drunk women. 

It took awhile for the group to actually play games, but shortly after it started it ended. They ended up talking while Zari put Adventure Time on in the background. 

Iris got up in a fast move, “I have an idea!” The group looked towards her, waiting for her to keep taking. “Truth or dare!” The group cheered in answer and they all sat in a semicircle(some of them were on top of eachother). 

Iris turned towards Felicity, “Truth or Dare?” It took Felicity a second but picked truth. “Who in this group would you get with if you weren't married?” Felicity hesitated before answering, “You probably.” Her answer got cackles and a few ‘I knew it’.

The circle got halfway through until it was Jax's turn. Laurel looked at Jax and raised her eyebrow, “Dare.” Laurel grew an evil grin, “Spin that bottle, and whoever it lands on you gotta kiss.” Jax shrugged and spun it, the bottle landed on Emiko. 

The girls started hooting like a bunch of frat boys. Jax looked at Emiko, she shook her head in permission. Jax leaned in and kissed Emiko; it was light, soft, hungry and alcohol filled. 

Laurel laughed, “Alright lovebirds we don't need a show.” The two pulled apart and they were both blushing and laughing. The group were having fun, they felt safe. Vigilantes and heroes usually don't get easy time but this once felt good.

After another hour they slowly started to leave and soon enough it was just Kara. Jax and Emiko had just left together and split up after exchanging numbers. Alex and Maggie were before them, Kara was still getting used to Maggie being back in Alex's life but she was happy that Alex was happy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> sorry this was way shorter than I usually write but girls night is here! Could there possibly be a new ship? Also my friends say it bothers their gay hearts to not know what Jax looks like but lemme tell you she a real snack. Anyways thank you for reading! Kudos and comments would be great! give me a follow on tumblr @ blue-impulse


	10. pop culture references and one salty steel boy

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> post girls night + a wack(or should I say quack) new member

barryallen: so you're telling me we're not allowed to know what happened last night

lildanvers: sorry boys

olliequeen: WHAT WE'D TELL YOU

directordanvers: calm down whiney boy

norawestallen: I thought you said white boy lmao

iriswestallen: that too

reneramirez: yo has anyone seen emiko 

speedyqueen: she's on earth 38

reneramirez: ok

lildanvers: fun fact about jax

lildanvers: she's rich

iriswestallen: so now she's a sugar daddy:)))

barryallen: I'm over this ig

bigdaddyjax: well I don't flaunt it

laurellance: it's true she deadass lives in a 2 bedroom apartment and has a car from the 60s

bigdaddyjax: IT'S MY BABY

manofsteel: you own a farm tho

manofsteel: and a hanger with cars and other shit

manofsteel: you have a house in italy

bigdaddyjax: you flaunt my money clark, not me

barryallen: you're a lawyer in the military how do you have so much money

bigdaddyjax: hard work

generallane: COUGH COUGH kill for hire COUGH 

bigdaddyjax: shut up lucy

bigdaddyjax: I'm gonna go watch hockey bye losers

iriswestallen: bye jax

barryallen: it's like noon

lildanvers: we have a college hockey team

directordanvers: you remember when those krypton cultists tried to blow it up

lildanvers: oh yeah

directordanvers: I broke so many laws driving there to evacuate it

detectivesawyer: I remember that night

detectivesawyer: you burnt dinner as you were on the phone

thebetterlane: you burn everything you cook alex

directordanvers: YOU WERE THE BETTER LANE UNTIL THIS MOMENT

generallane: HA!

directordanvers: you're not the better lane either

generallane: then who is

directordanvers: not you two that's for sure

barryallen: I wanna watch hockey 

bigdaddyjax: too bad speedy boy

bigdaddyjax: go watch nhl reruns or something 

olliequeen: the SASS on this one

felicitysmoak: all the danvers are sassy it's in the genetics

saralance: that ass is genetic for sure 

directordanvers: you would know

saralance: very few in this chat would know

vasquez: I had no sexual interaction with her but I once walked in on her

olliequeen: you sound like trump

manofsteel: never mention that disgusting man again 

brucieboy: yeah please never

barryallen: I'm gonna barf

vasquez: compare me to him again wannabe robin hood and I'll shoot your balls off with an AR

olliequeen: memo received 

generallane: how many people in this chat have you slept with alex?

directordanvers: do I have to count

iriswestallen: yes

dreamer: tea time

directordanvers: fine

directordanvers: let's see

 

lildanvers added mommad to the chat

directordanvers: maggie is a given

detectivesawyer: :))))

directordanvers: everyone knows about me and sara

saralance: best night of my life

directordanvers: there are 2 others

dreamer: ok but WHO

vasquez: spill the damn tea

generallane: we wanna know WHO you slept with alex TELL

mommad: I too would like to know about your love life, alexandra.

directordanvers: MOM

generallane: alexandra LMAOOO

mommad: lucy you're here! how long have you been in national city?

generallane: about a month

mommad: and you didn't think to visit?

generallane: sorry ma'am 

barryallen: HA WEAK

mommad: and what would you do if your mother missed you because you don't live nearby 

barryallen: …….

iriswestallen: that's a soft spot for him

mommad: my apologies 

laurellance: barry suddenly isn't the mom of the chat anymore 

barryallen: WHEN WAS I EVER

norawestallen: all you ever do is worry dad

iriswestallen: true

mommad: so you must be barry's wife?

iriswestallen: yes dr danvers

mommad: please, call me eliza.

iriswestallen: see I really can't cus my momma would come back from the dead and beat the shit outta me

mommad: I wish my girls had manners

lildanvers: I'm an angel!

mommad: don't let that puppy face fool you

mommad: also… is this a whole groupchat?

manofsteel: yes

olliequeen: there's like 30 people in here

brucieboy: yeah my family probably makes up the most of it

mommad: bruce! how are you?

brucieboy: I'm good eliza

laurellance: you know it's quite rude how no one has ever asked eliza how she was doing

olliequeen: COMING FROM YOU

laurellance: I may be a reforming criminal but that is not the way to treat someone's mother

laurellance: ALSO I'M NICE 

olliequeen: to like 3 people here

laurellance: jokes on you I'm besties with the whole girls club

ciscoramon: “besties” LMAO

laurellance: cisco is like the only guy here that I'm friends with

ciscoramon: I forgive and forget unlike some people 

mommad: why thank you laurel, I'm doing just fine.

laurellance: that's good

olliequeen: she's only sucking up bc she wants in one of your daughter's pants

laurellance: I HAVE A GIRLFRIEND YOU *these words have been censored * 

directordanvers: woah

cksteel: WOAH

felicitysmoak: im-

williamofqueens: good job aunt laurel!

saralance: I would've said the same thing omg

captaindrake: that's my baby

lildanvers: my eyes

thebetterlane: he deserves it

olliequeen: I-

emikoqueen: deserved that? yes

bigdaddyjax: man we missed a lot

emikoqueen: we were having fun so it doesn't matter

bigdaddyjax: preach

barryallen: how was the game

bigdaddyjax: twas good

mommad: hello jackson

bigdaddyjax: hi mom

mommad: doing well?

bigdaddyjax: of course 

bigdaddyjax: also I'm sorry I can't call tonight I have plans

mommad: you have a life I understand

 

_______________________

 

girls run the world

 

dovenotthesoap: this chat dead

wondergirl: yeah we need another girls night 

lildanvers: it should be weekly tbh

iriswestallen: we mentioned it but never went into planning 

directordanvers: we get off topic too much

norawestallen: we should have it at star labs this time!

iriswestallen: I agree

caitlinsnow: fine by me

lildanvers: is there a big belly burger 

laurellance: we deadass have a speedster, a witch, and YOU 

laurellance: I think if we wanted food from a distance you'd be fine to get it

lildanvers: well I didn't need sass

lildanvers has changed laurellance to sassysiren

sassysiren: ok

sassysiren has changed lildanvers: to poutypuppy

poutypuppy: RUDE

bigdaddyjax: but it's true???

poutypuppy: DON'T MAKE ME CHANGE YOUR NAME 

bigdaddyjax: do it. I'll beat your ass, you won't see it coming.

poutypuppy changed bigdaddyjax to tattooedbitch

 

arrowverse chat 

 

longlostolsentwin: why is there a menacing shadow in catco….

poutypuppy: I-

dreamer: I'M WORKING HERE

poutypuppy: I'M SORRY OK OK

tattooedbitch: that isn't me lmao I'm at work

poutypuppy: then who is it…?

tattooedbitch: idk

tattooedbitch: o wait

tattooedbitch: LMAOOOO

poutypuppy: WHO IS IT

tattooedbitch: the hash slinging slasher!

poutypuppy: BE REALISTIC 

tattooedbitch: it's the axe man!

mommad: jackson stop bullying your sister

tattooedbitch: no fun

tattooedbitch: it's gone

poutypuppy: how'd you do that you're at work???

tattooedbitch: I'm a witch, bitch.

iriswestallen: I felt that

 

tattooedbitch to emikoqueen

 

hey babe, I'm sorry but I have to do a job tonight

 

promise me you'll be safe?

I'll try

what is it?

it's something 3rd job related, don't worry

 

take care of yourself <3

I will  
also  
feed jerry please:))

of course

 

______

 

 

emikoqueen: CAN SOMEONE HELP ME FEED JAX'S DUCK

sassysiren: why

emikoqueen: he's staring menacingly

directordanvers: oh jerry is an asshole

jerrytheduck has joined the chat

jerrytheduck: you are both little bitches

jerrytheduck: shame on you

directordanvers: WHAT THE 

jerrytheduck: you are all fools

jerrytheduck: all you humans

brucieboy: this is wild

jerrytheduck: you literally have a son who is a starfish bruce

brucieboy: how….

jerrytheduck: I know EVERYTHING that jax knows

constantine: ah jerry the familiar, weren't you a bird???

jerrytheduck: some dummy shot him

constantine: makes sense

jerrytheduck: I'm the annoying 3rd familiar, outrun by a dumb bird and a ferret

constantine: mine died when I was young, never got another though

cksteel: I technically have a familiar 

poutypuppy: same, well I used to

mommad: is this chat always this weird?

brucieboy: yes

 

 

hours later

 

tattooedbitch: I come home and jerry is sleeping on my bed while emiko is on the couch

tattooedbitch: what you do JERRY

jerrytheduck: your girlfriend is a big BABY

tattooedbitch: SHE'S NOT MY GF

jerrytheduck: I bid you GOODBYE

jerrytheduck has left the chat

tattooedbitch: I just got done an exorcism and yet what goes down in this chat is WEIRDER

tattooedbitch: welcome to the weird place I guess

dreamer: but who in the weird place are you

tattooedbitch: geoff of course

tattooedbitch: you're definitely lindsey!

dreamer: OMG THANK YOU

dreamer: but who's the rest of our crew hmmm

tattooedbitch: ray and nate are definitely fredo and trevor

saralance: are they even in the chat

poutypuppy: I may have forgotten some legends...

olliequeen: DON'T ADD THEM THE CHAT IS TOO FULL

saralance has added manofsteel, notantman, and meanie to the chat

 

manofsteel: CHANGE YOUR FUCKING NAME

manofsteel: I AM THE SUPREME

manofsteel changed manofsteel to steelman

thebetterlane: lmao pardon clark he's a little salty tonight 

meanie: I like this guy

steelman: first of all 

notantman: rude

sassysiren: lmao

tattooedbitch: alrighty calm down cordelia goode

dreamer: ASHDJDKAKAL

tattooedbitch: peace out guys I'm gonna go do my duties;))))

olliequeen: THAT'S MY SISTER

emikoqueen sent a photo [cmr:chefjax]

emikoqueen: she wasn't being dirty you dummy she's cooking dinner

saralance: so you and jax huh👀👀

emikoqueen: fuck you

tattooedbitch: shut the fuck up

felicitysmoak: omg they're perfect for eachother

emikoqueen: what I gotta do to get y'all to shut tf up

tattooedbitch: I have an extra bedroom and she wants to train with me so now all y'all mind your own business

poutypuppy: they really do hate everyone 

cksteel: maybe you should stay out of their business 

williamofqueens: yeah

directordanvers: SIN

saralance: we don't believe in it

zarilovescharlie: yeah they never stopped bugging me and charlie

saralance: and look at you two now

charlieloveszari: eh

zarilovescharlie: WHAT'S THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN

charlieloveszari: she attac

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi y'all I'm back! please lmk what you think, especially about my OC. also enjoy the new ship!


	11. cockbites and motherly love

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> april fools day! MEET THE MAN!

saralance: it's april fools day!

lildanvers: time for me to fall for all your pranks 

tattooedbitch: o btw kara, alex; your adopted brother/nephew is coming to the states so I'm missing sister night to pick him up

kaldur-drama: brother/nephew wow that isn't complicated 

itshelenbitch: wow everyone in this chat with their family issues I stg

directordanvers: WAIT WHAT

tattooedbitch: I mentioned it in the story of my life

iriswestallen: you're welcome:))))

olliequeen: did you though 

tattooedbitch: yes you dummy

jasontheman: didn't you say I was it?

tattooedbitch: no you're just dead, I was shocked to see you though

sassysiren: “you're just dead” lmao

brucieboy: I remember, said adopted brother/nephew is damian

directordanvers: how'd you get that outta that

brucieboy: read between the lines, key words “I legally own his own blood” my only blood child is damian

olliequeen: that you know of

brucieboy: that I know of

tattooedbitch: see bruce is smart

tattooedbitch: I also have multiple pictures of me and damian in my apartment and at my work desk so screw y'alls obliviousness 

brucieboy: so how old is he?

tattooedbitch: that rascal is turning 15 in a few days, luckily it's right in time for spring break

tattooedbitch: I send him to school in italy because it keeps him off of the league's radar and my radar until he's safe under my watch

tattooedbitch: plus I have buddies watching him too

brucieboy: I take it you are overprotective and you spoil him

tattooedbitch: yes

brucieboy: we have that in common!

iriswestallen: mom club!

mommad: I knew about damian too by the way, kara and alex just don't pay attention.

tattooedbitch: see, pay attention people

blueboy: I forgot about this chat damn

sassiesnark: we were busy tho

impulse: yeah saving the day, you know how we do

blueboy: wait jax!

impulse: what no way!!! we got double J's now!

impulse: if only jason were still here

tattooedbitch: yeah… I miss him too yah know

blueboy: have you been doing? you heard from the old crew?

tattooedbitch: I last heard from dick and tim a few weeks ago, donna is doing good, and I'm picking damian up later

blueboy: that's good

impulse: tell him I said hi!!

tattooedbitch: will do. gotta case, talk later!

wondergirl: this whole E1 E38 shit is wack

barryallen: true

sassysiren: we need to find a way to just combine them u kno

olliequeen: wizards what do you think

constantine: did you just- 

tattooedbitch: I'm driving but,,,,,

tattooedbitch: EXCUSE ME BITCH

saralance: ollie you just got a hit on yourself

olliequeen: no one would ever get to me

tattooedbitch: I'm on a job rn I'd do it but:///

tattooedbitch: murder u kno

tattooedbitch: I'd rather be committing it

ciscoramon: with a certain person, me too

greatdetectiveralph: HEY!

katekane: me too

kaldur-drama: I live with multiple idiots, me too

impulse: how rude

dreamer: WAIT JAX YOU CAN'T BE BUSY TONIGHT

dreamer: RT IS 16 TODAY WE HAVE TO CELEBRATE BY GETTING PLASTERED

tattooedbitch: I- ugh fine after I pick dami up meet me at clancy's at 9

dreamer: teeheehee

sassysiren: i wanna get plastered

dreamer: you like rvb? rwby? gen:lock? ah? 

sassysiren: who

dreamer: you're not invited!

kidflash: I LOVE RWBY!!!!

dreamer: you wanna come??

kidflash: I can't but I'll celebrate from here!

cksteel: I'm underage but I like rvb

tattooedbitch: can't we just like get a bunch of takeout and hang at my apartment

tattooedbitch: you just bring like soda and shit and me and dami will pick up the food

dreamer: ugh fine

tattooedbitch: and we can watch rvb

olliequeen: what is rvb

dreamer: red vs blue, it's a great show! and one of the longest running web series 

tattooedbitch: alright who's coming, I need to know what y'all want I leave soon so I need to order

cksteel: dad I'm going

manofsteel: I- wait you didn't ask

cksteel: I'm flying over auntie j!

williamofqueens: pick me up://

felicitysmoak: yeah come pick your boyfriend up superboy

manofsteel: don't call him that! you'll give him ideas!

sassysiren: “boyfriend” y'all were exposed 

tattooedbitch: I'm gonna have a bunch of teenagers in my apartment,,,, terrific

reneramirez: zoe says she likes something called always open

dreamer: she can come!

reneramirez: can that fly boy pick her up

cksteel: on my way where y'all at

williamofqueens: I'll show you

tattooedbitch: 5 teenagers in my apartment hmmm

dreamer: you mean 4

tattooedbitch: oh I meant 5

dreamer: KARA JAX IS BULLYING ME

poutypuppy: idc

detectivesawyer: she really said idgaf

poutypuppy: ok but has jax ever LOOKED YOU IN THE EYE

brainy: it's quite scary….

kaldur-drama: you are just big babies

tattooedbitch: yeah they are

kaldur-drama: I like this one

tattooedbitch: you're pretty cool too fishboy

kaldur-drama: pardon

emikoqueen: take the compliment, she tried

tattooedbitch: ight bye bitches I have sum business then I'll be home with dami, text me if ya'll coming and what you want to eat

sassysiren: we love a busy witch

timnotturner: does she even do legal stuff

generallane: lmao she's jax 

dickthedick: and

generallane: she does what she wants

generallane: anyways I'm heading to DC for the week so cha for now

vasquez: yeehaw

brainy: two mean ladies left

cksteel: I'm feeling italian tonight

dreamer: me too

williamofqueens: me three

reneramirez: zoe loves italian

cksteel: add her

williamofqueens added zoeramirez to the chat

williamofqueens: you feeling italian tonight?

zoeramirez: hell yeah!

reneramirez: ya'll are bad influences 

spoilergoesbrrrrrr: we do it in style tho

jasontheman: true

 

__________________

 

 

tattooedbitch: alrighty I ordered the food and me and dami are heading to pick it up

dreamer: I'm starving

cksteel: huRRY

tattooedbitch: I am NOT getting any speeding tickets in this

directordanvers: DON'T TEXT AND DRIVE 

tattooedbitch: actually she's not

manofsteel: hello damian

tattooedbitch: clark

 

manofsteel added demonspawn to the chat

 

demonspawn: ah how sincere

brucieboy: this is weird

demonspawn: ah yes, I was warned about you all.

jasontheman: “warned” what did we do something 

manofsteel: no dumbass he knows your counterparts and had a hard time with them

demonspawn: thank you clark

demonspawn: I have heard you guys like to party

sassysiren: OF COURSE 

jasontheman: someone say party

saralance: always up for one

speedyqueen: me too

tattooedbitch: you're underage shut the hell up

demonspawn: don't think I didn't see you with mother

tattooedbitch: hush

demonspawn: you were 15!

tattooedbitch: you shouldn't even remember that!

demonspawn: I was 6 I saw and remembered everything! sadly everything

olliequeen: wait wait wait did you ram talia?

tattooedbitch: no!

demonspawn: yes!

tattooedbitch: I SWEAR I DIDN'T 

tattooedbitch: I don't sleep with older women

demonspawn: she was 20!

tattooedbitch: and she had a child then!

tattooedbitch: AHeM

demonspawn: ok then you rammed auntie

tattooedbitch: I did NOT SLEEP WITH NYSSA

saralance: I would like to know the deets

demonspawn: oh I have HOT TEA sis

dreamer: SPILL DURING THE PARTY

saralance: WAIT WAIT I'M NOT INVITED 

sassysiren: THE TEA CAN'T BE SPILLED WITHOUT US

 

cockbite crew

 

tattooedbitch: we on our way let's get this

dreamer: the name of our chat HOW ORIGINAL

tattooedbitch: I forgot the og logo so I looked it up

tattooedbitch: don't look up cockbite all by itself on google….. just don't

zoeramirez: noted

zoeramirez: anyways I'm excited!

dreamer: what all do you wanna watch?

tattooedbitch: the first few eps of rvb 

demonspawn: we should have one of the podcasts on while we eat

cksteel: we should watch either the rt podcast or off topic

zoeramirez: or always open!

williamofqueens: or the rt shorts!

demonspawn: those are the BEST

tattooedbitch: gus isn't in today's rt podcast so let's watch off topic

dreamer: BOOOOOO

demonspawn: then who's in it????

tattooedbitch: matt hullum, burnie, gavin, and ellie

dreamer: I LOVE ELLIE

dreamer: MY BRITISH BABY

tattooedbitch: what about gavin

dreamer: gavin ruins everything

tattooedbitch: I KNOW HIM I'LL TELL HIM YOU SAID THAT 

dreamer: WAIT YOU KNOW GAVIN???

tattooedbitch: I met him when I was stationed in austin

tattooedbitch: and geoff

tattooedbitch: he said he liked my tattoos teeheehee

williamofqueens: LUCKY

tattooedbitch: they follow me on insta too

zoeramirez: STOP RUBBING IT IN

tattooedbitch sent a photo from @jjdanvers on Instagram

dreamer: RUDE

tattooedbitch: aight we need to get a photo for the gram

 

Instagram

 

jjdanvers celebrating @roosterteeth on their 16th with these fools @damialghul @nianall @williamqueen @zoe-r @king-conner

Liked by alexdanvers, loiskentlane, elizadanvers and 233 others  
View All 22 comments  
geofflramsey you coming to tex soon?  
nianall we cute  
saralance ugh can't believe I wasn't invited

 

arrowverse chat

 

olliequeen: how was your night kids?

williamofqueens: my tummy hurts

zoeramirez: I'm never eating that much again

demonspawn: y'all are babies

cksteel: yeah

tattooedbitch: I'm stuffed

cksteel: me too

tattooedbitch: you agreed with dami 2 secs ago

cksteel: I can't read suddenly, I don't know 

tattooedbitch: don't use a meme AGAINST ME

tattooedbitch: you should've just sat there and ATE YOUR FOOD

dreamer: you just got SCHOOLED!

tattooedbitch: now to prepare myself for hell

constantine: tell luci I said hi

tattooedbitch: man I wanna go to LA now

constantine: you weren't going there in the first place?

tattooedbitch: no, I have family dinner tonight

constantine: oh

olliequeen: who's luci

constantine: mortals like you don't need to know

demonspawn: I'm delighted for tonight:))

directordanvers: that's good

tattooedbitch: HE'S LYING HE'S NOT A SAINT

demonspawn: I AM TOO

tattooedbitch: YOU ARE NOT

demonspawn: RUDE

tattooedbitch: calm child

kaldur-drama: children being smartasses amirite

manofsteel: true

impulse: how rude

mommad: my plane is landing in 45 who's picking me up?

poutypuppy: jax is

tattooedbitch: what does WORK MEAN TO YOU DUMBASS

tattooedbitch: also I'm in sc sooooo ahahaha fuck you

detectivesawyer: I can pick you up eliza I'm nearby

mommad: thank you dear

mommad: and remember you can call me mom

detectivesawyer: 😳😳😳😳

directordanvers: MOM

saralance: DAMNIT A COP BEAT ME TO IT

detectivesawyer: what's that supposed to mean

saralance: you beat an assassin to one lucky lady:/

directordanvers: you still on abt that

saralance: UGH RUDE

oracle: I am back

jasontheman: you were gone?

casscain: shut up jason

oracle: don't be an ass

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope y'all liked it! kudos and comments are great! and yes the young justice kids are back! also I'm gonna start writing a superfriends chat fic but it corresponds with this! maybe a batfam chat too??


	12. sorry I don't speak italian

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the BC has risen! + another new member + sisterly fights

felicitysmoak: LADIES AND GENTLEMEN

dreamer: and nb pals

captaindrake: I WOULD LIKE TO INTRODUCE

captaindrake: MY LOVING, CARING GIRLFRIEND

captaindrake: THE BLACK FUCKING CANARY

sassysiren: double up bitches

barryallen: wait you two are both black canaries tho

sassysiren: I actually have to redeem myself but I'd never take the mantle from my baby:)

captaindrake: I love you baby❤❤

sassysiren: love you too

saralance: aaaaannnd they went to go fuck

saralance: but damn I forgot how good my white canary suit feels:/

felicitysmoak: you're always welcome back

saralance: I have the team, I can't leave them

notantman: actually

saralance: can it ray

directordanvers: well dinner was…..

dreamer: a fucking nightmare 

zarilovescharlie: what happened?

directordanvers: jax and kara got into a fight

directordanvers: and I broke it up before it turned physical

zarilovescharlie: oh shit

itshelenbitch: family drama, what a mood

directordanvers: when I stepped in front of that punch….. yeahhhhh

saralance: kryptonian punch or witch punch

directordanvers: witch

saralance: both ouchies

jasontheman: wait so I heard supermans weakness is crips at night

impulse: AHAHAHAHAHA

norawestallen: I WHEEZED

emikoqueen: alrighty who scared jax off to star city

emikoqueen: she ISN'T CALM IN THE FIELD WHILE ANGRY

emikoqueen: thanks to whoever pissed her off, I'm gonna go clean up THE MESS

directordanvers: I swear I did nothing

emikoqueen: WHICH ONE OF YA'LL

directordanvers: IT WAS KARA OK OK

olliequeen: what were they fighting over

directordanvers: damian accidentally let go that jax was dating someone and kara said that "all jax does is lie" and it pissed jax off🤷🤷 

directordanvers: that's what I heard before it got worse, they argued quietly for a little before it escalated

emikoqueen: what the fuck

emikoqueen: this is my fault

directordanvers: how???

olliequeen: you weren't there

emikoqueen: we've been dating in secret OKAY

emikoqueen: she didn't tell anyone who because I wasn't ready to come out

emikoqueen: the only people who know are damian because he walked in on us kissing

emikoqueen: that's all

emikoqueen: Y'ALL HAPPY NOW OR WHAT

emikoqueen: now I gotta go stop my girlfriend from killing people 

sassysiren: going✈ help emiko

captaindrake: going✈ stop emiko and laurel from being stupid going to stop jax from being stupid

saralance: going✈ make sure timeline is ok

zarilovescharlie: they won't affect it doing that tho….

saralance: I WANNA BE INCLUDED OK

brucieboy: I have breakfast for TWO MINUTES

demonspawn: where's jax

barryallen: look up in the chat

demonspawn: o yikes

demonspawn: back to bed ig

directordanvers: you want me to come over and make breakfast?

demonspawn: LMAO bold of you to assume that jax hasn't told me that you're a bad cook

directordanvers: ok rude…

lluthor: I am back

saralance: you literally missed so much

lluthor: it can't be that much

directordanvers: we have another sister

lluthor: WHAT

directordanvers: yep

lluthor: I wanna meet her!

directordanvers: she's actually on earth 1 rn kara and her got in a fight during dinner and now she's taking her feelings out on who I assume are criminals

emikoqueen: we are back to my apartment and if anyone knows how to deal with demons, please help

constantine: great not again

directordanvers: let's hope everything is okay

generallane: it's a normal thing when she gets really angry or sad

directordanvers: terrific

directordanvers: sooooo…. *clasps hands* how's DC?

generallane: boring as usual

sassysiren: it's just filled with a bunch of rich white dudes who belittle you no matter how high up you are

generallane: yes! exactly!

sassysiren: lawyers know how it is

generallane: true

generallane: has the jax situation calmed down?

emikoqueen: thankfully

mommad: you care for her don't you?

emikoqueen: yes

mommad: well when you're ready, I'm always up for a dinner

dreamer: I'm never going to dinner again that was-

emikoqueen: I'd like that

olliequeen: my sister: a secret softie

emikoqueen: I'll kill you

tattooedbitch: she will

demonspawn: finally I'M HUNGRY

directordanvers: I OFFERED TO COOK

tattooedbitch: thank god he said no, I don't need my apartment burned down 

directordanvers: RUDE

detectivesawyer: it's true babe…

saralance: you remember when you set the coffee pot on fire

dreamer: lmao

iriswestallen: bad cook squad!

directordanvers: y'all just turn on me whenever

tattooedbitch: gtg getting a new car

sassysiren: I HEARD CAR

sassysiren: what's the deets

tattooedbitch: 1958 plymouth fury :)))))

sassysiren: RED???

tattooedbitch: OF COURSE

sassysiren: I NEED TO SEE IT

tattooedbitch: come over for dinner and I'll take you to my garage 

tattooedbitch: bring dinah too

demonspawn: pls don't have a foursome I live here now:/

tattooedbitch: I'd never do that

tattooedbitch: ……..with you in the house

vasquez: you are three people who'd be the fourth?

vasquez: I volunteer

emikoqueen: it would be me so back off

sassysiren: so you'd be into it huh…

emikoqueen: it's you three of course

captaindrake: KINKY

tattooedbitch: foursome with my gf and two bestfriends?

tattooedbitch: it would bring us closer together lmao

 

foursome squad

tattooedbitch: alright what y'all want me to make for dinner

emikoqueen: well you'll be there so we'll all automatically have something to eat :)))

sassysiren: you beat me to it damnit

captaindrake: you make the greatest beef enchiladas and rice

sassysiren: ou with your fresh salsa

emikoqueen: AND THE CHIPS

tattooedbitch: enchiladas, got it

 

arrowverse chat

poutypuppy: hey guys

olliequeen: hi kara

poutypuppy: I see you're caught up on dinner

olliequeen: yes kara

poutypuppy: goodie

demonspawn: sister

tattooedbitch: yes dami

demonspawn: make up with other sister

tattooedbitch: ugh fine

tattooedbitch: I'm sorry that you were a dickhole and I got angry and tried to punch you

directordanvers: AHEM

tattooedbitch: ……. but ended up hitting alex because she jumped in front of you

directordanvers: that's better

directordanvers: now I'm going to go ice my fatass bruise

poutypuppy: you don't have to apologize jax

poutypuppy: I'm sorry for being pushy, and calling you a liar

tattooedbitch: oh I am one, a good one. but I do it for reason.

demonspawn: just know kara, family is the most important thing to jax

poutypuppy: wow… I'm an asshole

tattooedbitch: no you're not. we do things for the ones we love, and your case is stupid things

poutypuppy: yeah

poutypuppy: truce?

tattooedbitch: truce

tattooedbitch: let's re-do dinner tomorrow and I'll bring my gf with me

emikoqueen: said gf has a name:)

tattooedbitch: yes darling, you do

emikoqueen: I hope you're not busy at work

sassysiren: I visit her anyway usually 

detectivesawyer: we're just working on the case

detectivesawyer: alex, you wanna join?

directordanvers: sure:)

tattooedbitch: wha-

detectivesawyer: your girlfriend is coming to bother us so I invited mine to even it out

emikoqueen: "bother" lmao I'm taking her from you

detectivesawyer: make sure to bring her back:/

tattooedbitch: we're going for lunch

olliequeen: just lunch?

dovenotthesoap: they're gonna go fuck

tattooedbitch: woah there

tattooedbitch: where have you been

wondergirl: we went to lesbos

tattooedbitch: lucky ass

dovenotthesoap: yes she does have one

tattooedbitch: DASFHJFKAKA

olliequeen: you can't just put that thought into my head then change the subject

dovenotthesoap: uh yes I can, and I just did

olliequeen: jax when are you coming back to visit star city

tattooedbitch: I'm gonna come back with emiko after dinner tonight

olliequeen: good good good

tattooedbitch: should this hoe be a worry or,,,,,,

felicitysmoak: DASHDJSKAKAK

saralance: the biggest thing he's gonna do is either shovel talk you or challenge you to a duel LOA style

tattooedbitch: hmmmmm BET

emikoqueen: please please please oliver do neither….

olliequeen: hm

olliequeen: nah

emikoqueen: jax don't come back with me

tattooedbitch: just from hearing what sara said he might do it sounds fun

emikoqueen: great

emikoqueen: my brother is an idiot 

emikoqueen: my gf is an idiot

generallane: true

tattooedbitch: my ex gf and my current gf just agreed on something

tattooedbitch: is the end near?

detectivesawyer: run

tattooedbitch: I mean I could hide on e18 ya'll won't ever find me there

demonspawn: puh-lease I know where you would go and I would give the location away in a heartbeat

tattooedbitch: you have no clue

generallane: where would she go👀👀👀

demonspawn: she would go to gotham and rejoin the sirens and stay with selina

tattooedbitch: HOW'D YOU KNOW

demonspawn: father did not approve of your friendship with selina

tattooedbitch: fuck bruce

brucieboy: hey!

tattooedbitch: fuck e38 bruce

brucieboy: that's better

dickthedick: fuck batman

brucieboy: mood

poutypuppy: aren't you still batman???

brucieboy: I kinda retired

timnotturner: there is the whole batfam to keep the streets clear anyway

dovenotthesoap: we're here, we're queer, we keep the streets clear

dreamer: why does that sound like something from a fanfic

dovenotthesoap: idk🤷🤷🤷

dreamer: anyways

dreamer: GUESS WHO IS PROTECTING NATIONAL CITY WHILE KARA IS TAKING A SUPERGIRL BREAK

sassysiren: jax!

dreamer: NO IT'S ME!!!

tattooedbitch: yeah apparently I'm "too harsh" so I can't fight crime in NC

poutypuppy: you carry a SWORD

tattooedbitch: what can I not show off my moves every once in a while 

poutypuppy: one of the moves is literally called "human popsicle"

ciscoramon: caitlin literally just slammed her head on the desk from laughing at that

tattooedbitch: what, I live for that kinda shit

constantine: you or that thing inside of you

tattooedbitch: rude

sassysiren: "that thing inside of you" don't call emiko a thing

olliequeen: I quit

tattooedbitch: vaffanculo

dreamer: sorry I don't speak Italian

demonspawn: oh no

thelonglostolsen: why is there an intruder alert at catco

thelonglostolsen: who is it this time

demonspawn: she's here..

dreamer: FUCK NOW I HAVE THE DUOLINGO OWL AFTER ME

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey y'all! go check out my superfriends chatfic! thank y'all for reading.


	13. ncpd, gcpd, ccpd, scpd, how many cpd's are there???

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's chaotic. that's it. that's the summary.

generallane: hey guys 

demonspawn: ain't you that bitch that used to get rammed by jax

meanie: I like this kid

sassysiren: jax has the good alcohol going✈ liver cancer 

generallane: who knows about me and jax

olliequeen: literally everyone

notantman: jax is in here????

saralance: not waverider jax

tattooedbitch: though I might join the crew soon if these people don't hop off my dick

sassysiren: we can bunk!

olliequeen: so that's where you went

sassysiren: well I can't show my face in public rn sooooo

olliequeen: I thought you guys settled that

sassysiren: we did but you know the people of SS

olliequeen: true

olliequeen: well the waverider always needed another canary

saralance: you're damn right!

tattooedbitch: sarah manning

dreamer: YEs

emikoqueen: I'm taking the 3 birds from the chat to get plastered,,, byeeeee

saralance: see yah

 

5 hours and many drinks later

 

tattooedbitch: after much thought and deliberation 

tattooedbitch: I have decided to turn over a new leaf, and become a nun

manofsteel: at least her spelling is right

sassysiren: I'm literally higher than a kite

sassysiren: kite

sassysiren: is that the right spelling

sassysiren: kite is a weird word

olliequeen: oh no they're all high

emikoqueen: haha I think there's a rat in the apartment 

directordanvers: james stay away from emiko!

thelonglostolsen: WHAT DID I DO

sassysiren: you guys remember clexa

dreamer: #CLEXA AFTERLIFE 2020

sassysiren: when the 100 ends and bellarke never happens we're throwing a party sisters we've earned that right

poutypuppy: eldest child: bitch middle child: dumbass youngest child: thot

tattooedbitch: begone

tattooedbitch: if it wasn't for that whole you came here at 13 thing I'd technically be older than you

sassysiren: guys frank ocean just came on we're gonna go die

charlieloveszari: I want weed

zarilovescharlie: no

charlieloveszari: ok

jasontheman: man I could use some

timnotturner: I would like to try….

dickthedick: no

oracle: let us have fun!

kaldur'ahm: marijuana has never worked on me

impulse: what about seaweed

kaldur'ahm: are you-

blueboy: that was funny

sassiesnark: SEAWEED ASHDBSJAKK

kaldur'ahm: it was not that funny

impulse: it WAS THO

spoilergoesbrrrrrr: omg

spoilergoesbrrrrrr: seaWEED I get it DAFSJAKAK

constantine: that's bloody brilliant

constantine: zari let your girlfriend smoke the jane I mean tomorrow is what you american twats call 4/20

brainy: BLAZE IT

directordanvers: how

brainy: winn must've set a code for whenever somebody says 4/20 the machine answers

brainy: BLAZE IT

lluthor: hi guys it's late

tattooedbitch: is that a fucking luthor 

vasquez: I can feel the accent

manofsteel: I'VE BEEN SAYING THAT FOR MONTHS

lluthor: yes it is

tattooedbitch: WHAT THE FUCK IS A LUTHOR DOING IN HERE

poutypuppy: she's good she's good!

poutypuppy: nothing like her mom and brother 

demonspawn: ahhhh does super sister have a crussshhh

poutypuppy: excuse

lluthor: except I'm great at being manipulated

tattooedbitch: hmmm ok

detectivesawyer: luthor you found another rich idiot

tattooedbitch: rude!

tattooedbitch: also

 

tattooedbitch changed lluthor to thegoodone

 

thegoodone: I like it!

poutypuppy: but naming people is my job

ciscoramon: actually

caitlinsnow: cisco is jealous

poutypuppy: :///

thegoodone: you're good at everything kara

directordanvers: COUGH

demonspawn: idiots I say IDIOTS 

tattooedbitch: shhh dami

tattooedbitch: cisco myyy man!

ciscoramon: yes

tattooedbitch: so I heard you can go to different earths

ciscoramon: yes

tattooedbitch: my watch broke and I lost connection to earth 18

saralance: oooooohhhh who's there

tattooedbitch: my friends 

demonspawn: our friends 

ciscoramon: what happened to your watch?

tattooedbitch: SOMEBODY SHOT IT

emikoqueen: hEY YOU SCARED ME

olliequeen: she has good aim

tattooedbitch: she was aiming for my hand

emikoqueen: RUDE

tattooedbitch: you love it tho

emikoqueen: ugh touche

speedyqueen: stop being cute

tattooedbitch: sorry but a power couple like us gotta keep you losers in check sometimes

directordanvers: RUDE

detectivesawyer: we were the power couple FIRST

directorsharpe: actually we were

directordanvers: me and maggie were engaged before you two even met

poutypuppy: and you two broke up before they even met

detectivesawyer: who asked you

poutypuppy: rude

detectivesawyer: issa touchy subject

thelonglostolsen: hey can I add kelly

directordanvers: NO

poutypuppy: yes

directordanvers: kILL mE

 

thelonglostolsen has added theotherolsensister

 

ciscoramon: who comes UP WITH THESE NAMES

sassysiren: somebody's triggered

ciscoramon: I AM NoT

tattooedbitch: he his

tattooedbitch sent a photo [cmr: triggerednerd]

detectivesawyer: oH that's where you went

tattooedbitch: yeah I've been on earth 1 for like an hour now

tattooedbitch: you noticed that I was missing?

detectivesawyer: you didn't beat up the tech interns

tattooedbitch: beat em up sawyer!

poutypuppy: why are you so violent

tattooedbitch: well why not

poutypuppy: you could tone it down a little

saralance: THAT'S FUNNY

sassysiren: yeah why not

emikoqueen: being violent is fun

directordanvers: yeah!

olliequeen: I love how most of the violent people in here are women

iriswestallen: what's that supposed to mean ollie huh?

thebetterlane: yeAH

demonspawn: are you disrespecting my sisters and their friends?

demonspawn: is he gonna be a problem

speedyqueen: idk ARE you oliver?

olliequeen: ……

olliequeen: at this point why am I even in this chat

saralance: 🤷🤷

speedyqueen: beats me

olliequeen: fine I'll go

speedyqueen: WAIT YOU GINORMOUS IDIOT

saralance: he takes everything so seriously now omg

captaindrake: including his job, I'm lowkey proud

captaindrake: speaking of, team arrow meet in the bunker we have an emergency

emikoqueen: does this include me?

olliequeen: no

emikoqueen: alright I see how it is

emikoqueen: jackson baby come over:/

tattooedbitch: I'm sorry but I got a work emergency

emikoqueen: wow no one needs me ok I see how it is

reneramirez: watch over the glades

emikoqueen: might go kill someone idk

sassysiren: I'd help buuut

sassysiren: tin man wants to train

notantman: rude

detectivesawyer: wait the ncpd doesn't have any active emergencies

demonspawn: then it probably isn't ncpd

poutypuppy: welp since I can't supergirl rn

poutypuppy: going✈ do my actual job

detectivesawyer: wow people in this chat are actually WORKING

detectivesawyer: so howdy team flash and time travel people

caitlinsnow: team flash is busy with the three rogues going around 

detectivesawyer: why aren't you with them

caitlinsnow: my dad died

detectivesawyer: oh more daddy issues…. terrific

sassysiren: the rest of the legends are on a mission rn, idk where mick and charlie went tho

hungryhungryharley: wow this chat still exists

detectivesawyer: yeah

hungryhungryharley: hiya gal, my names harley

detectivesawyer: I'm maggie

hungryhungryharley: does that make you maggie sawyer?

detectivesawyer: yes..

hungryhungryharley: oh well I know earth 1 you!

hungryhungryharley: we're buds!

brucieboy: if you count her trying to arrest you and you hitting her with a giant mallet as best buds thennn…

hungryhungryharley: that's all in the past brucie!

oracle: didn't you shoot my dad once

hungryhungryharley: it was only the foot!

blueboy: "only" DASHFJSKAKAK

drisley: leave her be!

hungryhungryharley: they're only making conversation pam

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyyy y'all! it's may! I have 6 weeks of school left and my uncle is coming back to the states in two weeks so I have alot planned during my break and when I go and visit. also I took down my dinahsiren fic to rewrite the first chapter so don't worry! I appreciate the comments and PLEASE talk to me on Twitter @ mafiadaddygully


	14. oh great who's dead this time

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> meet the people jax mentioned! also trouble in team arrow town! (trouble in terrorist town get it? hehe)

sassysiren: hey uh guys

zarilovescharlie: what's wrong

sassysiren: team arrow are at the scpd

directordanvers: aren't they like deputized or something

sassysiren: yeahh but two guards were found dead at the metro

sassysiren: guys roy KILLED them

speedyqueen: oh no

speedyqueen: I thought nyssa fixed it

tattooedbitch: fixed what???

speedyqueen: when we were looking for the last lazarus pits he died

tattooedbitch: and now he has bloodlust

speedyqueen: the elixir was working!

tattooedbitch: the elixir NEVER STAYS WORKING

tattooedbitch: which pit did you use

speedyqueen: the one in saudi arabia

tattooedbitch: …….

tattooedbitch: let me finish fixing my watch, I'll meet roy at the bunker

captaindrake: the team is clear, but I'm risking my job for this

olliequeen: if one of the team is in trouble, we go down with them

reneramirez: you're damn right

felicitysmoak: dinah your acting was HOT

captaindrake: thank you

captaindrake: your acting was,,,, hormonal

felicitysmoak: well I couldn't HELP IT

saralance: hi y'all….

tattooedbitch: what did one of of y'all kill someone too

saralance: ray is possessed…

tattooedbitch: well that's why you have a johnny mf constantine

saralance: he has john..

tattooedbitch: well you have nora!

saralance: nora is in a coma

tattooedbitch: WHAT THE FUCK

charlieloveszari: mood

tattooedbitch: well I'd help buuuuut I'm helping team arrow rn then I have to go to earth 18

saralance: we can do this ig

tattooedbitch: I'm gonna send something through a portal, jab it into one of nora's veins

felicitysmoak: I walk into the bunker and jax is covered in blood jesus how many murders do we have to cover up

tattooedbitch: I'm BUSY

felicitysmoak: BUSY GETTING BLOOD ALL OVER MY FLOOR

tattooedbitch: YOU WANNA COME HERE AND SAY THAT

directordanvers: a pregnant woman vs jax

sassysiren: 20 bucks on jax

iriswestallen: 20 on jax not hurting a pregnant woman

tattooedbitch: damn u right tho

iriswestallen: 20 bucks pls laurel:)))

sassysiren: can I buy u wine instead

iriswestallen: OF COURSE

felicitysmoak: going✈ back to find the bad guys, team arrow out

tattooedbitch: alrighty folks I'm off to earth 18! 

sassysiren: :((((

wondergirl: send nudes!

tattooedbitch: i only know the james charles brand is that good

timnotturner: HAHAHAHAHA

ciscoramon: don't break the watch again!

iriswestallen: wait isn't wally dating someone from earth 18

barryallen: I think so

theotherolsensister: what is this

vasquez: says anyone who has entered the chat

cksteel: you were added like a day ago and you just now seeing this

theotherolsensister: I work

cksteel: OOOOOOOOHHHHH WOOOOORK

manofsteel: conner don't harass james' sister

thelonglostolsen: or do

vasquez: I THOUGHT YOU NEVER USE THIS CHAT

thelonglostolsen: I read

cksteel: we have a lurker on our hands

thelonglostolsen: this is the superhero chat I told you about

theotherolsensister: ooohhhhh

thelonglostolsen: guys this is my sister kelly

directorsharpe: alex's ex?

directordanvers: SHUT UP AVA

directorsharpe: teehehe

directordanvers: I thought you were at work

directorsharpe: I take breaks

directordanvers: lmao I'm avoiding the deo rn

saralance: cause of the whole agent liberty shit

directordanvers: yeah..

saralance: and I'm guessing kara is back at catco cus of the whole supergirl situation

lluthor: actually we're all at my apartment

saralance: you and kara orrr

lluthor: me alex kara and maggie

saralance: a Fearsome Foursome©

poutypuppy: wouldn't that be incest

detectivesawyer: my sister in law is an idiot 

iriswestallen: "sister in law" 

iriswestallen: did you get hitched and not tell us?

directordanvers: no

directordanvers: BUT YOU REMEMBER THE LAST TIME WE WENT TO A WEDDING

directordanvers: If I remember it was YOUR wedding

iriswestallen: oh yeah felicity and oliver crashed it

directordanvers: DON'T FORGET THE NAZIS

saralance: also don't leave out the part where we sleep together then become a badass duo!

directordanvers: i-

directordanvers: I'm leaving

barryallen: I forgot about that!

directordanvers: how can you when people bring it up EVERY TWO SECONDS

saralance: hey that was a good memory!

directordanvers: I DIDN'T SAY IT WAS A BAD ONE

saralance: you thought it tho!

directordanvers: no

 

 

hours later

 

earth 18/38 idiots

 

lilrickie: why is my window open

timmytwoknives: why do you assume one of us did it

lilrickie: first of all

timmytwoknives: fight me

kitty: please I don't need to clean the rug AGAIN

lilrickie: just buy another, I know you have the money

kitty: fuck you rick

tattooedbitch: suprise BITCH

babs: JAX

kitty: JAY

timmytwoknives: YOU'RE BACK

orphan: !!!!

stephonup: I MISSED YOU

tattooedbitch: I missed y'all://

lilrickie: no you didn't

tattooedbitch: ****I missed everyone except u

tattooedbitch: dickhead

tattooedbitch: damn I know too many dick/ricks

lilrickie: ???

tattooedbitch: it's hard to explain

kitty: we live on another earth that isn't ours, your news shouldn't be hard to explain

tattooedbitch: my sister's added me to a superhero group chat and I met some of your earth 1 counterparts

kitty: is earth 1 me a snack?

tattooedbitch: you're not in the chat, that I know of

tattooedbitch: I'll have to ask bruce if he knows you

lilrickie: BRUCE????

tattooedbitch: shut up the adults are talking

tattooedbitch: but yes E1 bruce is there, and he is nice

timmytwoknives: at least one of them are nice

tattooedbitch: also the barbara on E1 is paralyzed???

babs: WHAT

tattooedbitch: yeahh… she has a hard life

tattooedbitch: the joker killed her parents then shot her in the spine

babs: what the FUCK

tattooedbitch: yeah, but bruce and kate killed him

timmytwoknives: I would like in this chat

tattooedbitch: there's literally 40 people in it

timmytwoknives: and?

tattooedbitch: MAYBE

tattooedbitch: damnit no one is answering

timmytwoknives: lies

tattooedbitch: LITERALLY

tattooedbitch: brb

 

arrowverse chat

 

tattooedbitch: why nunya bitches answering my messages

sassysiren: I'm here

tattooedbitch: I need kara or alex

sassysiren: ok I see

tattooedbitch: while I'm here tho

tattooedbitch: AYE YO BRUCE

brucieboy: you called?

tattooedbitch: do you know selina kyle

katekane: I do!

tattooedbitch: so she is on your earth?

katekane: yes but she moved out of gotham years ago and I haven't seen her since

katekane: why?

tattooedbitch: I was talking to my E18 fam and selina asked if I knew a E1 her and I said I'd ask the chat

katekane: oh cool, tell her I said hi even tho she don't know me

tattooedbitch: will do

tattooedbitch: also anyone talk to emiko or team arrow??

tattooedbitch: she isn't answering me I'm worried that she's mad at me cus I'm on another earth

sassysiren: I haven't heard anything from dinah so they're probably still busy

tattooedbitch: ah shucks

 

earth 18/38 idiots

 

tattooedbitch: selina you are on earth 1 but you moved out of gotham a few years ago

tattooedbitch: also kate says hi even tho she don't know you

kitty: HI!!!!

tattooedbitch: so ig both my sisters are busy they ain't answering

tattooedbitch: most of the teams are busy

tattooedbitch: but team arrow needs to get back now!

timmytwoknives: why you like team arrow sm?

babs: I bet her gf is on it

tattooedbitch: how'd you know

babs: I just feel it

tattooedbitch: yeah well none of them are answering and I'm worried the mission went wrong or she's mad at me

lilrickie: so you keeping a gf from us?

tattooedbitch: and you keeping a boyfriend from us

lilrickie: huh?

tattooedbitch: I'm friends with wally, rick

stephonup: woah woAH WOAH

stephonup: BOYFRIEND?????

lilrickie: OKAY OKAY

lilrickie: I just want us to be honest

tattooedbitch: hmmm ok

tattooedbitch: I ain't reopening shit rick so don't even pull up with that bullshit

lilrickie: fine

tattooedbitch: ANYWAYS

tattooedbitch: how are the titans?

lilrickie: they're good

lilrickie: how's dami?

tattooedbitch: good, he's at my apartment rn since it's spring break

stephonup: tell him we said hi!

tattooedbitch: will do

tattooedbitch: actually he's with my cousin, I forgot that he said he would go help them on the farm

timmytwoknives: clark?

tattooedbitch: yeah

tattooedbitch: ALSO GUESS WHO'S IN TOWN

kitty: WHO

tattooedbitch: lucy!

orphan: she was an asshole

tattooedbitch: and she still is but we cool

orphan: that's good

timmytwoknives: has the military called you back?

tattooedbitch: not yet but I have the feeling that it'll be soon now

 

 

arrowverse chat

 

sassysiren: GUYS IT'S BEEN A DAY

vasquez: good she can count!

sassysiren: dinah hasn't answered my calls or texts 

sassysiren: felicity hasn't either

sassysiren: there's no sign of them at the bunker and their suits are offline

barryallen: go pick zoe up from school, I'll search the city

sassysiren: on it

iriswestallen: wait felicity never goes on missions??

sassysiren: they needed her to hack a system

iriswestallen: makes sense

iriswestallen: has jax heard back from emiko?

sassysiren: she switched back to earth 18 mode so I haven't heard anything

barryallen: I'm checking the city now

barryallen: message here with anything

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> omg I posted early for once??? anyways hope y'all enjoy this! kudos and comments are great!
> 
> explanation for the earth 18/38 situation:  
> so the whole group is from earth 38 but after their jason died, rick took tim cass and steph to earth 18 to start a new life. jax hates rick for that and she hates him for the fact that rick never protected them all when she was in the military. so she blames herself for jason's death. jax is 27, rick is 25, tim is 21, cass and steph are 19, selina is 29, damian is 15. they were all raised by the league (except selina). for the time bruce spent on lian yu they were all a team (except dami) then he left them and a very pregnant talia. when jax was 18 talia got killed and jax promised to watch over damian. jax has mafia and gang ties so she has protection over damian as he goes to school in italy. there are two parts to the league, the bad and good side. and both sides have powerful witches and warlocks. jax isn't bad but some people would argue that she isn't good. she's not evil she just has different positions ig you can say. jax also has been resurrected over 4 times and that has caused a demon to reside in her, she isn't possessed it's just like how caitlin snow has killer frost. 
> 
> that's all I can think of to explain, if you have questions please COMMENT. and ask if you wanna put jax in one of your fics! you can reach me on tumblr @ blue-impulse and twitter @ mafiadaddygully


	15. 2 betrayals and a funeral(sorta)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a death + the groupchat getting bigger(ik ik)

barryallen: I didn't find them

barryallen: what were they looking for???

sassysiren: the ninth circle

sassysiren: they're a new "terrorist" organization in town and they're the reason I got outed

barryallen: know anything else?

sassysiren: I know that emiko used to be part of them

demonspawn: did you say "used to" ?

sassysiren: yes

demonspawn: where we're from if you say you aren't part of something anymore that you were born into, that's a lie

poutypuppy: you don't know what you're saying

demonspawn: yes I do, it applies to many things that I know

brucieboy: that would mean…

brucieboy: jax is still…

demonspawn: yes

demonspawn: of course she is

poutypuppy: jax is still what??

saralance: she's still part of the league

demonspawn: I mean so am I, y'all know who my mom is

demonspawn: you can never get out of something you were born into unless you take it down

saralance: that's why I could get out easily.

saralance: ish

barryallen: does jax know that emiko is still part of it??

sassysiren: she wants them dead

barryallen: she's not gonna enjoy this then

saralance: we need to find the team AND emiko

saralance: laurel put that good suit of yours on

saralance: we're going to star city

demonspawn: stay safe

manofsteel: if you need some kryptonians let us know, I'm by the phone

saralance: will do

saralance: see you guys soon

ciscoramon: if you need jax I can vibe someone to earth 18 to get her

demonspawn: I know where she is

brucieboy: why didn't you go with her?

demonspawn: I promised to help clark on the farm

barryallen: the farm where lois almost beat oliver with a wrench

thebetterlane: that very one!

demonspawn: smallville booooooyyyysss

generallane: I'm back with news

iriswestallen: oh no is something wrong with team supergirl?

generallane: no it's military related

iriswestallen: oh

generallane: where's jax I need to talk to her

iriswestallen: she's on earth 18

generallane: whaT thE FUCK

generallane: well she needs to get her ass back 

generallane: her unit is being sent to israel and she's A team

demonspawn: WAIT WHAT

directordanvers: WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY

sassysiren: so now you're here

directordanvers: I was busy

sassysiren: well go up and read what you missed dummy

detectivesawyer: don't call her that

sassysiren: you wanna go

detectivesawyer: YEAH

sassysiren: I don't need to waste my time on a cop I have my friends to save and terrorists to kill

sassysiren: and by friends I mean that pregnant idiot and my GIRLFRIEND

 

move this wherever it will fit

 

earth 18/38 idiots

 

demonspawn: jax get ur ass HOME

demonspawn: there are many issues

demonspawn: also hi y'all

lilrickie: DAMIAN

demonspawn: aCtuAlLy I gO bY ian NoW

lilrickie: rude

babs: rick and jax are getting along!

tattooedbitch: what's wrong

demonspawn: lucy said she needs to talk

demonspawn: also team arrow is missing

tattooedbitch: is emiko okay????

demonspawn: she is nowhere to be found

demonspawn: but I have some news that you're not gonna like,,,

tattooedbitch: what

demonspawn: it's bad 

tattooedbitch: WHAT IS IT

demonspawn: we have reason to believe that emiko is still part of the ninth circle

tattooedbitch: who fucking put that into your head

demonspawn: emiko was raised into it

tattooedbitch: oh great my logic being used against me

tattooedbitch: FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

lilrickie: doesn't it suck being right all the time

tattooedbitch: we were being NICE FOR 2 SECONDS I WANT THIS TO LAST RICK

lilrickie: DAGSFAJAKAK I'M SORRY

tattooedbitch: I guess I'm going home sooner than I wanted to 

timmytwoknives: rick scares off another one

kitty: love you j

tattooedbitch: love you too

kitty: remember if she leaves you I'm still here!

tattooedbitch: too soon

kitty: sorry

 

 

arrowverse chat

 

tattooedbitch: I'm back and I'm on a path

tattooedbitch: who's my crew

sassysiren: me

sassysiren: sara has to deal with her waverider issue

tattooedbitch: true

tattooedbitch: we're taking my harley!

hungryhungryharley: awwww you guys it feels great to be included

sassysiren: she's talking about her bike

hungryhungryharley: rude

saralance: well shit is going to shit

saralance: not only does neron have ray and john but gary too

felicitysmoak: guys I'm okay!

felicitysmoak: I don't know about the team though

sassysiren: WHY WEREN'T YOU AT THE BUNKER

felicitysmoak: I'm heading there now, we ran into……. problems

tattooedbitch: who's we?????

tattooedbitch: and if you say the baby imma clap you

felicitysmoak: no me and alena dajdjskakak

tattooedbitch: thank satan

felicitysmoak: but we need to let the team get out on their own

tattooedbitch: explain

felicitysmoak: their coms are fine meaning they are fine

felicitysmoak: if you go in, you risk the place collapsing even more, risking the loss of two more of the team

tattooedbitch: fuck

tattooedbitch: what about emiko, is what they say true?

felicitysmoak: we're not sure, she could be faking them out, or doing their work

tattooedbitch: I need to walk…. or kill something

sassysiren: how about a burger! I'll get you a burger!

tattooedbitch: what about that food truck

sassysiren: I'll get you enchiladas!

tattooedbitch: 3 red sauce with extra rice please

felicitysmoak: can I have some churros…?

sassysiren: shit I left my wallet on the waverider

impulse: your wallet is right next to you

tattooedbitch: I'm right next to her

tattooedbitch: oh-

demonspawn: I'M SENDING THIS TO THE EARTH 18 CHAT AGDHAKAKAK

tattooedbitch: my soul

 

felicitysmoak added alenathecomputer

 

alenathecomputer: I'm #blessed

demonspawn: tim asks why he isn't allowed in the chat

timnottheturner: yeah why isn't tim #2 allowed

tattooedbitch: the chat is SO full

brucieboy: ADD YOUR BATFAM

tattooedbitch: the caos….

demonspawn: do it pussy, or I will

tattooedbitch: RUDE

alenathecomputer: this chat is wilder than I thought

kaldur'ahm: it is only monday

tattooedbitch: it's about to get wilder

 

tattooedbitch added lilrickie, timmytwoknives, kitty, babs, orphan, and stephonup to the chat

 

timmytwoknives: about DAMN time 

tattooedbitch: this is gonna turn into a mess..

kitty: and we'll clean it up!

babs: YOU NEVER CLEAN UP MESSES

kitty: I CLEAN UP EVERY MESS THAT RICK AND TIM MAKE

brucieboy: hello hopefully emotionally stable batfam

lilrickie: is that possible?

brucieboy: god knows

tattooedbitch: he knows NOTHING

dreamer: you know nothing jon snow

kidflash: rick!

lilrickie: you're in this?

kidflash: yeahhh

lilrickie: well I would've wanted in sooner if I knew you'd be here

babs: is this speedy boyfriend

kidflash: I'm speedy boyfriend!

iriswestallen: WAIT THIS IS HIM

kidflash: yes!!!

iriswestallen: CUTE

alenathecomputer: happy gays uwu

tattooedbitch: you're about to see a SAD gay

tattooedbitch: where's the nearest bridge

alenathecomputer: well if you wanna go sightseeing, the bridge in the glades is nice

tattooedbitch: thanks

felicitysmoak: NO

felicitysmoak: we'll get through this together!

lilrickie: you guys seem fun

detectivesawyer: I once said that

directordanvers: rude

timmytwoknives: hey is that alex?

directordanvers: yes..

timmytwoknives: I'm tim! your brother!

directordanvers: jax is the batfam my whole family…?

tattooedbitch: yes!

mommad: I heard family

kitty: hi mom!

mommad: I like these people already

timmytwoknives: finally a mom who loves me

timnottheturner: mood

timmytwoknives: are you…. me?

timnottheturner: yes

timmytwoknives sent a photo [cmr: pointingspidermen]

timnottheturner: I LIKE THIS ONE

tattooedbitch removed emikoqueen from the chat

tattooedbitch: I know how to get emiko's attention

felicitysmoak: spill

tattooedbitch: I'm gonna fake my death

poutypuppy: how?

tattooedbitch: I'll die

tattooedbitch: I was reading through past team arrow cases, and I read about christopher chance

tattooedbitch: like I'm gonna set some shit up at the station, I'll talk to some contacts

tattooedbitch: do a spell and people will see my body and the paramedics will "take me away" 

tattooedbitch: then I'll slip out of the van in EMT uniform and head to a hideout

poutypuppy: should we set up a fake funeral?

tattooedbitch: of course

felicitysmoak: shit

detectivesawyer: what are we gonna tell the station

tattooedbitch: I'll say I have criminals after me

tattooedbitch: I know captain will understand and I hope I can get everyone in

detectivesawyer: okay

tattooedbitch: "known terrorist kills us air force soldier" seems eh

felicitysmoak: I can do some hacky tings

poutypuppy: I can get someone to write an article

demonspawn: shit

demonspawn: we actually going through with this?

tattooedbitch: yeah

directordanvers: sounds understandable

felicitysmoak: I can get word around on earth one that red bird is dead

tattooedbitch: yeah you do that

sassysiren: will she believe that is the question

dreamer: we have to act believable

manofsteel: we'll come to the funeral

generallane: same

tattooedbitch: just talked to the captain, looks like I'm gonna die tomorrow

tattooedbitch: I'm gonna die in my apartment I guess

poutypuppy: we'll get the killer don't worry!

tattooedbitch: DAFDGAJAKAK

timmytwoknives: gone too soon

lilrickie: a true american hero

blueboy: *bagpipes*

tattooedbitch: YA'LL WTF

blueboy: it's like we can still hear her voice

kitty: sniff sniff

poutypuppy: she was a great sister, I can't believe she's gone

vasquez: she was mean but she was pretty lit

tattooedbitch: y'all I might die fr

lilrickie: WE'RE BEING GOOD ACTORS

tattooedbitch: and?

tattooedbitch: you want a fucking oscar

lilrickie: maybe I do

directordanvers: welp bye

tattooedbitch: man I can't even have one last good fuck before I die

sassysiren: you'll never smoke weed again!

tattooedbitch: I'll bring sum with me:/

detectivesawyer: get some sleep, you have a death tomorrow

tattooedbitch: you right

demonspawn: I'll stay at clark's for good measure

tattooedbitch: see y'all bitches in the afterlife

alenathecomputer: relatable last words

alenathecomputer: rest in peace

 

_________________

 

hours and one "murder" later

 

directordanvers: guys she's gone

brucieboy: WHO

directordanvers: read up dipshit

brucieboy: rude…

felicitysmoak: the news is out on earth one, me alena and laurel are in mourning:(

saralance: 20 bucks says they're eating

sassysiren: you can't mourn without food

sassysiren: and we have to be prepared for emiko to come to the bunker

sassysiren: going✈ bottle of whiskey

directordanvers: we have a funeral set up

lilrickie: looks like we're coming to earth 38 again

timmytwoknives: is the walking dead still going there

dreamer: yes

timmytwoknives: good

lilrickie: OUR SISTER DIED AND YOU'RE WORRIED ABOUT IF EARTH 38 HAS TWD

timmytwoknives: ummm yes bitch

timmytwoknives: I have to mourn both fictional and non fictional

zarilovescharlie: wish we could come to the funeral

poutypuppy: us too

zarilovescharlie: where'd she go anyway

poutypuppy: somewhere secret, her last words in the chat were her last words to us

sassysiren: I'm on the waverider keeping eyes on the cameras in the bunker, so I'll know if emiko comes

felicitysmoak: we're going dark

sassysiren: same

directordanvers: keep us updated

sassysiren: you too

demonspawn: y'all stop making jokes this shit ain't funny 

directordanvers: true

lilrickie: well are we gonna have dinner tonight or something cus we're bored af

poutypuppy: sure

stephonup: thank god

 

 

hours later

 

sassysiren: the outside camera just went out

sassysiren: EMIKO IS THERE

sassysiren: she looks sad

sassysiren: she's pissed

sassysiren: she's aiming at felicity bitch I'm boutta hop over there

directordanvers: felicity can handle herself just keep watching

sassysiren: she fired at the monitors

sassysiren: she put her bow down

sassysiren: they're talking

sassysiren: felicity waved at the camera, I'm heading over

directordanvers: we need an inside bitch though!

demonspawn: yeah we need to know if jax is dead or not

dreamer: idk why this shit funny

manofsteel: this is a serious matter! a woman is dead!

vasquez: ASDFGHJAKALAL

sassysiren: emiko is innocent

detectivesawyer: are you SURE 

sassysiren: she wasn't there, it was that irish dude I don't remember his name

ciscoramon: the one who stole archer?

sassysiren: yeah him

directordanvers: fuck

sassysiren: she wants to know where jax is

demonspawn: you trust her that much?

sassysiren: yes

demonspawn: nanda parabat

demonspawn: I will send for her to come back

detectivesawyer: I guess I'll tell the captain to dismiss everything

directordanvers: and cancel the funeral ig

saralance: wait she's in nanda parabat? I hate going near there idk how she does it

demonspawn: it's changed a lot for us

demonspawn: there's still bad memories tho

poutypuppy: is that on luna yuh or whatever

lilrickie: "luna yuh" FUCK

lilrickie: it's lian yu, and no it's in saudi arabia

poutypuppy: so that's where she gets the traditions

lilrickie: yeah, we're all like that

lilrickie: she follows like 3 different religions

lilrickie: I follow like 2

demonspawn added emikoqueen to the chat

lilrickie: dami follows 1, he's practically a satanist

demonspawn: am not!

orphan: oh you definitely are

stephonup: sorry but I gotta agree

demonspawn: we'll see what jax says

emikoqueen: is she back…?

demonspawn: I couldn't get ahold of her imma keep trying tho

lilrickie: we came here for nothing lmao

demonspawn: I like you back here

timmytwoknives: yeah

felicitysmoak: hey guys

demonspawn: what's wrong

felicitysmoak: nothing! everyone got out, with minor-ish injuries

emikoqueen: if you don't trust me I understand but I may know where they might next hit

olliequeen: we need all the help we can get… but we need to talk

emikoqueen: of course

sassysiren: I'm glad to have my baby back

captaindrake: :)))

alenathecomputer: uwu

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ok so there are officially 49 people in this chat. and fuck is it gonna get bigger. this is just a big ol mess and rn I'm juggling the storylines and blah. this would've been posted Wednesday but me and my mom didn't watch arrow until last night so I couldn't write until I knew what happened. tbh I really don't know what to do with the emiko situation, but I DON'T want her to be a fucking terrorist like the show is doing. after the shows end I'm gonna do like this bigass summer party. also the master of group meetups is the great @doctormissy they recently mentioned jax in their chatfics so PLEASE GO CHECK OUT THEIR AMAZING WORK!!! love ya'll n see yah next week around this time. 
> 
> tumblr- @blue-impulse   
> twitter- @mafiadaddygully


	16. 98% of our mothers are dead

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is like a filler chapter ig it's crazy and lazy

dreamer: howdy guys gals and nonbinary pals

dreamer: I need a theme song

cksteel: can't nobody tell me nothinnn

cksteel: you can't tell me nothinnn

cksteel: my life is a movie

cksteel: bullriding and boobies

cksteel: cowboy hat from gucci 

cksteel: wrangler on mah booty

dreamer: can it be the billy ray remix

cksteel: YES

cksteel: I WAS GETTING THERE

cksteel: anyways

cksteel: so jax, how's your current relationship status 

demonspawn: jax can't come to the phone right now

demonspawn: please leave a message after you hear the tone

demonspawn: when you are done recording please hang up or dial 666 for more options 

lilrickie: satanist

blueboy: hey sleepyhead! I like that song

blueboy: it's a good pick

dreamer: thank u

impulse: next

cassiethesnark: bitch

poutypuppy: mood

lluthor: I witnessed that with my own eyes:))))

zarilovescharlie: please don't mention eyes- nora

saralance: wait nora isn't in this

 

saralance added thegooddarhk to the chat

zarilovescharlie: now we have 3 supernatural being in here!

thegooddarhk: "supernatural beings" that's a way to put it

saralance: is it true that both jax and john know lucifer

demonspawn: idk about john but I know jax does

demonspawn: I was never allowed to go to LA with her tho

olliequeen: well hello

barryallen: the talk go well?

olliequeen: better than I thought, but this talk was somewhat easier for emiko then her talk with jax is gonna be

lilrickie: for sure

olliequeen: did more people get added while we were on the mission….

lilrickie: you're damn right

thegooddarhk: I'm finally here

timmytwoknives: that's what I said

alenathecomputer: me too

directordanvers: hi I'd do it but I have some personal shit rn so can someone check in on jax

demonspawn: I LEAVE FOR 2 SECONDS

lilrickie: she's probably in some major feelings so she'd go to a safe place

mommad: she's not here, but she'll always answer my calls

emikoqueen: please, she isn't at her apartment

emikoqueen: I need to talk to her

lilrickie: you guys literally just mentioned where she is

blueboy: old town road?

lilrickie: nO

nonorawestallen: that song just came on the radio

lilrickie: LA YOU IDIOTS

demonspawn: oh

demonspawn: well whoever goes to get her say hi to lucifer for me

emikoqueen: well where in LA

demonspawn: lux, it's luci's club in downtown LA

emikoqueen: looks like I'm going to LA

demonspawn: say hi for me PLEASE 

emikoqueen: ok ok

emikoqueen: wish me luck

kitty: you brought it to be

speedyqueen: hi u gay mfs

timmytwoknives: what the-

lilrickie: WHY

demonspawn: you just broke them

speedyqueen: I'm that bitch

demonspawn: guys it's not earth 38 her chill out

speedyqueen: oh yeah, me and jax are chill

speedyqueen: but my sister fucked her before me:////

lilrickie: damn u really are that bitch

speedyqueen: thank you

emikoqueen: ok I'm in LA and I literally don't know where tf I'm at

lilrickie: look it up dummy

directordanvers: I don't think jax even wants to see you right now

emikoqueen: I need to apologize, she can't beat herself up for what I did

 

interlude to lux

 

Emiko walked into the club, the music was not the typical upbeat that you usually hear. She eyed the crowd looking for Jax, or hopefully someone who she would assume was Lucifer.

After a while of looking she heard that laugh, the laugh that she had grew to love. The laugh that made her remember all the good things in her life. The laugh that wasn't so suddle it was loud, some people would call it obnoxious, but to her, it was the greatest thing.

She almost cried hearing it, she felt that she betrayed Jax. Emiko walked slowly over to where Jax sat. She was sitting with four people, all of them women except one, who she assumed was Lucifer.

Chloe began to speak but stopped when she saw Emiko standing there. It was enough for the whole group to look at where Chloe had been looking.

Jax stood up, "Emiko?" She was almost in tears, her face showing so many emotions. Emiko didn't know what to say.

Before she could even apprehend the situation Jax walked over to her and pulled her into a teary bone crushing hug. "I missed you so fucking much." They were both crying.

They let go and Emiko pulled Jax to the side. "We really need to talk, well I really need to talk to you." Jax nodded and they took a seat. 

"I need to apologize, for how stupid I was. I lied, I was still doing stuff for the ninth circle. And to think, I did it knowing all of what you've been through. I betrayed you and I can't imagine how much I hurt you. But I want you to know, I had nothing to do with what happened to the group."

Jax took Emiko's hands in hers, "I've never been good with feelings, I mean look, I ran to another fucking city. I run, so much. I just, I'm horrible when it comes to me. And to hear that you were still with the ninth circle I just lost all hope. The woman that I let in and fell in love with is part of some terrorist organization."

Emiko was taken back, "what did you just say?" Jax raised her eyebrow. "Um what did I say." Emiko was smiling like an idiot, "You said you love me you dummy." Jax's mouth turned into the perfect O. 

She was redder than a fire truck. "I- I didn't mean to. Unless you're okay with it I just, it slipped." Emiko cupped Jax's cheek then pulled her into a deep kiss.

"I love you too, you colossal idiot." She grabbed Jax's hand, "now introduce me to your friends."

 

 

arrowverse chat

 

sassysiren: did emiko make it to the club lmao

lilrickie: I haven't heard anything

demonspawn: yeah me either

mommad: jackson never answered my call

lilrickie: she's probably busy

timmytwoknives: don't think I didn't see that

lilrickie: what do you mean??

timmytwoknives: oh you know

timmytwoknives: I saw what you originally typed

lilrickie: I have no idea what you're talking about

kidflash: leave my baby alone

timmytwoknives: oh we taking sides now are we

kaldur-drama: so what are you all doing this weekend? I know it's mothers day but idk who has mommy issues

dreamer: 98% of our mothers are dead

saralance: true

mommad: that's terrible

saralance: and a good bit of those mothers were killed in front of us

barryallen: ugh don't remind me

olliequeen: yeah please

iriswestallen: mrs danvers are you coming to nc for mothers day?

mommad: please call me eliza, I haven't been legally married in years

mommad: and no

iriswestallen: we should have a mothers day party at star labs!

lilrickie: dami's bday is on sunday too

greatdetectiveralph: I HEARD PARTY 

cksteel: LET'S DO IT 

tattooedbitch: ̶ s̶a̶d̶ ̶g̶a̶y̶ 

tattooedbitch: happy gay✅

alenathecomputer: uwu

tattooedbitch: me and emiko are gonna stay in LA for a while though

tattooedbitch: we both need the break

emikoqueen: and plus, hanging with the devil is pretty dope

thegooddarhk: wait y'all know lucifer?

tattooedbitch sent a photo [cmr: luciferandfriends]

brucieboy: ummmmmm…….

katekane: oh WAIT

katekane: LMAOOO

jasontheman: wHat

katekane: y'all remember that threesome bruce mentioned with john

olliequeen: BRUCE SLEPT WITH THE DEVIL?????

tattooedbitch added lucifermorningstar to the chat

lucifermorningstar: indeed

lucifermorningstar: now goodbye you petty humans

olliequeen: WAIT WAIT WAIT

demonspawn: hello lucifer

lucifermorningstar: hello damian

tattooedbitch changed lucifermorningstar to hornydevil

hornydevil: 👹

olliequeen: wow

hornydevil: queen…. hmmm

hornydevil: have I slept with you?

olliequeen: I'm not sure

felicitysmoak: the fact that he doesn't know shows a lot

manofsteel: have I slept with you?

hornydevil: probably not tin man

manofsteel: i-

generallane: WE GET IT YOU EXPERIMENTED 

olliequeen: I'm not being shit on for once

emikoqueen: oh it's coming

olliequeen: TWO SECONDS

hornydevil: soooo can I add my pals?

olliequeen: y'all gonna do it anyways

hornydevil: don't be salty queenie

 

hornydevil added thedetective, mazequeen, ellaumbrella, amen, and evee to the chat

dreamer: is that a pokemon joke

ellaumbrella: I made her do it

evee: I don't understand it

hornydevil: it should be daddysgirl

dovenotthesoap: are you guys more kinky than us???

hornydevil: no one can compete against us

poutypuppy: ehhhhhhh

hornydevil: they call me the horny devil for a reason

hornydevil: and where's your ever nickname miss dovenotthesoap

dovenotthesoap: I'm the dove….

evee: that's funny!

mazequeen: eh

iriswestallen: so are we going through with the mothers day party or what

poutypuppy: let's do it

mommad: I guess I'm in

iriswestallen: good cause you're the only mother

norawestallen: well technically you are:))))

iriswestallen: I-

demonspawn: I wish mom was here for this

tattooedbitch: isn't she alive on earth one

olliequeen: yes, she was in prison with me

sassysiren: keyword was

speedyqueen: I only am in contact with nyssa

speedyqueen: she is next to me rn too

olliequeen: she is the only one who I'd actually let in here

hornydevil: what do you not enjoy our presence ollie?

mazequeen: do I have to kill him

hornydevil: hmmm I'm not sure yet

detectivesawyer: how come this chat is either talking about our weird ass missions, parties, sex, and killing eachother

mazequeen: mortals are weird:/

dreamer: wait are there more supernatural beings

thegooddarhk: STOP CALLING US THAT

dreamer: rude

hornydevil: me maze and eve

dreamer: thank u for answering my SIMPLE QUESTION 

directordanvers: eve?

evee: that's me!

directordanvers: like uh

directordanvers: like adam and eve?

evee: yeah!

directordanvers: that's wild

hornydevil: she has a girlfriend too

mazequeen: she truly is daddy's girl

evee: 🥴🥴🥴🥴

iriswestallen: hey uh we ran into an issue we're gonna have to cancel the party

olliequeen: us too

mommad: that is understandable

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi ya'll I'm back early! damn I can't believe the shows are ending already this year has gone by so fast. hope y'all are having a better weekend than me. I'll be back in a couple days


	17. the end of an era

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> SPOILERS for arrow 7x22!

tattooedbitch: hi guys..

iriswestallen: what's wrong

tattooedbitch: well see lex made kaznia attack the US so he could "become a true American hero" and save us

tattooedbitch: and that undid so much out of the US

tattooedbitch: so I have to go stitch together the united nations

tattooedbitch: idk how long I'm gonna be gone, until the issue is resolved is all I know

iriswestallen: didn't you have to go to like afghanistan or something

tattooedbitch: I was switched out due to reranking, and they need a lawyer not a soldier

felicitysmoak: don't die

tattooedbitch: uhhhh bitch don't make that a concern

emikoqueen: YEAH

emikoqueen: we just said i love you, i don't need to lose her

jasontheman: that made me sister soft

timmytwoknives: sister is sister canceled

jasontheman: wait that happened on earth 38 too?

timmytwoknives: yeah queen tati ended sister j*mes in 45 minutes

jasontheman: lmaoooo

brucieboy: I wish you good travels jax

tattooedbitch: thanks

emikoqueen: she said that out loud with the most confused face

emikoqueen: she's cute sometimes

tattooedbitch: I'm cute all the time

emikoqueen: ehh

captaindrake: you two remind me of me and laurel

saralance: soooo laurel

sassysiren: I'm literally a room away from you but

sassysiren: yeah

saralance: when are you gonna bring another dinah drake into the lance family

sassysiren: patience

poutypuppy: wait,,, another????

saralance: yeah our mom's name was dinah drake

poutypuppy: that's wild

poutypuppy: also we made friends with the kaznia me!

sassysiren: describe friends?

poutypuppy: she's actually a lot like me

tattooedbitch: yeah sadly there are two of her now

thegoodone: i don't know how i would handle it

 

poutypupy added emopuppy to the chat

 

olliequeen: MORE PEOPLE ARE YOU KIDDING 

olliequeen: THERE ARE LIKE 60 PEOPLE IN HERE NOW

emopuppy: is that a problem?

olliequeen: kara i thought you said you two were alike….

felicitysmoak: he says that in fear

poutypuppy: we have our differences 

sassiesnark: CAN THIS CHAT STAY ON TOPIC FOR 2 SECONDS

detectivesawyer: ugh 

olliequeen: not to go off topic but we have another mission, be back soon

emikoqueen: I think it's best if I stay out of that mess

demonspawn: mood

poutypuppy: good luck!

captaindrake: we need no luck

emopuppy: what is the purpose of this chat

iriswestallen: it's so our true selves are exposed

iriswestallen: we're neutral caotic

emopuppy: humans are,,, weird

hornydevil: true

mazequeen: I've literally said that for years

thedetective: I'm normal

saralance: not anymore

zarilovescharlie: you know LUCIFER you are not normal

hornydevil: is that a compliment or..?

zarilovescharlie: well she knows the king of hell so she isn't normal but idk you as a person sooo

hornydevil: well darling we need to meet

zarilovescharlie: and I oop

iriswestallen: hey when is jax leaving

directordanvers: her plane leaves in an hour we're saying goodbye rn

iriswestallen: send pics!

directordanvers sent a photo [cmr: family!]

lilrickie: after she leaves we're going back home

ciscoramon: did you guys get my present?

lilrickie: yes we did! thank u.

brucieboy: what was the present

ciscoramon: I sent them the interdimensional key so they can text from their earth

brucieboy: oh cool

 

hours later

 

olliequeen: we really saved the city PHEW

reneramirez: it feels great

olliequeen added arsenal to the chat

barryallen: and you complain about there being too many people in this chat

olliequeen: oop

arsenal: hi barry

barryallen: roy!

caitlinsnow: oh good cisco's boyfriend is here

ciscoramon: don't bully me

arsenal: hey cisco!

ciscoramon: hi roy

norawestallen: teehee

ciscoramon: what was that mini barry

norawestallen: nothing

felicitysmoak: hey guys we have an announcement

iriswestallen: ou tea!

olliequeen: we're leaving star city

barryallen: wait WHAT

olliequeen: with all the trouble we've been through this year we think it's best to keep the baby safe

felicitysmoak: john is setting us up in a safe house

felicitysmoak: and the neighborhood is all people he trusts 

saralance: what about the rest of the team?

captaindrake: we'll still watch over the city 

olliequeen: it's been 7 long years, it's time for another team to come in

olliequeen: but I'll still be here for those crossover things we have every year

barryallen: we'll miss you ollie

manofsteel: good luck

thebetterlane: you'll be great parents

poutypuppy: I'm proud of you two

iriswestallen: we're gonna miss you guys

olliequeen: and other news, william's grandparents are giving us shared custody

saralance: that's great

olliequeen: we'll check in here every once in a while, but it was a fun ride with you guys

poutypuppy: we love you

olliequeen: I love you all

directorsharpe: mr queen are you getting soft on us?

olliequeen: enjoy the moment

saralance: man I'm crying

poutypuppy: me too

speedyqueen: I wish I was here to see y'all 

brucieboy: have fun kids

felicitysmoak: "kids"

felicitysmoak: oh and please keep us updated on the demon situation sara!

saralance: will do

felicitysmoak: oh and keep us updated on the lex situation too kara

poutypuppy: don't worry we will

poutypuppy: let us know when you have the baby?

felicitysmoak: we will

olliequeen: man is it hard to say goodbye

olliequeen: it's the end of an era, and I'm thankful for all of you guys. we're a family, so make sure it stays this way.

barryallen: we'll never forget each other

olliequeen: never.

poutypuppy: I swear to rao

manofsteel: me too

saralance: idk who that is but I swear to rao too

arsenal: you made us all better people oliver, we'll never forget that

olliequeen: alright I'm crying now

olliequeen: I love you all one last time

felicitysmoak: bye guys!

alenathecomputer: ❤

barryallen: what's the point in life now

poutypuppy: idk anymore

saralance: should we like have a gc with the leaders?? so it's just business on when we need help or yadda yadda

barryallen: that's a good idea

saralance: gideon is gonna make one

 

 

gideon has made an mini group inside of arrowverse chat

gideon added barryallen, poutypuppy, saralance, olliequeen, lilrickie, kaldur-drama, arsenal, hornydevil, and brucieboy to the chat

arsenal: wait lmao I'm not a leader

gideon: since oliver is not always going to be here captain lance suggested adding you as the new team arrow leader

arsenal: shouldn't it be dinah or rene or someone else?

poutypuppy: you don't believe in yourself?

arsenal: I killed two guards, I don't trust myself

barryallen: well we trust you roy

saralance: with our lives

lilrickie: well I feel blessed to be even thought of

poutypuppy: you're the only way we can get ahold of our earth 18 buddies if something goes down 

brucieboy: I'm not even batman anymore

gideon: can you petty humans stop complaining, you all are damn fine leaders and the only changes to this chat will be different team leaders

hornydevil: I like this one

poutypuppy: just for that

poutypuppy changed the chat name to the council of self-doubting idiots

gideon:

gideon: you're not wrong

hornydevil: hehe

hornydevil: my apologies but I'm afraid I have business to take care of

 

arrowverse chat

 

iriswestallen: how much u wanna bet that the leaders gc is already off topic 

captaindrake: I have no doubt

lilrickie: they're complaining how they're not good enough to be leaders

iriswestallen: lmao they're the depressed gc

sassysiren: it's been weeks since we used the gays and the girls night chat

iriswestallen: omg I forgot about that

theotherolsensister: I forgot about this chat

iriswestallen: how do you forget about it when it blows up every 2 seconds

theotherolsensister: I have it muted 

iriswestallen: I'm hurt

iriswestallen: anyways

iriswestallen: cisco why did you-

greatdetectiveralph: ou cisco turn it UP

caitlinsnow: two types of people 

barryallen: cisco WHAT

caitlinsnow: for those who don't know cisco is blaring the thotiana remix over the labs speakers

sassysiren: that's why cisco is my favorite person

captaindrake: aHEM

sassysiren: …..he's my 2nd favorite person 

ciscoramon: we needed some happiness 

directordanvers: the deo could surely use some happiness 

directordanvers: I'm 2 seconds away from killing lockwood

thegoodone: not if I kill him first

directordanvers: oh I'll kill him first 

thegoodone: you'll get court-martialed 

generallane: and you'd need a good ass lawyer for that

directordanvers: I have jax for that

generallane: I WAS TALKING ABOUT ME

directordanvers: I still have jax for that

generallane: fuck u

 

 

the council of self-doubting idiots

 

saralance: we fixed the neron problem

hornydevil: neron?

hornydevil: that bloody bastard got out?

hornydevil: send him to me and I'll gladly punish him

saralance: oh I will 

saralance: well john will

hornydevil: he'll get what he deserves

 

arrowverse chat 

 

notantman: hey guys!!!

barryallen: RAY YOU'RE BACK!

notantman: and it feels good to u know not have a demon in me

barryallen: you feeling good?

notantman: yeah

notantman: so what I miss?

barryallen: scroll up dude

notantman: okay!

emikoqueen: is he always that happy

saralance: yeah

emikoqueen: woah

emikoqueen: can't imagine it

saralance: how is it without jax?

emikoqueen: it's only been a few hours but I'll be okay

poutypuppy: you're always invited to game night

emikoqueen: isn't it on fridays?

poutypuppy: yep! and my clone will be there

emopuppy: I have a name

poutypuppy: oh YEAH this is linda guys!

poutypuppy: she'll fit in with the laurel and jax area

sassysiren: I'll see y'all at game night so I can meet my new bestfriend

poutypuppy: she doesn't listen to music tho

sassysiren: SIN

sassysiren: do you drink????

emopuppy: lots of water

sassysiren: disgusting

captaindrake: you need to stop drinking like that

sassysiren: what's an alcohol

captaindrake: 🤦🤦🤦

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey guys! I'm posting this before the flash airs because I just got in serious trouble and idk if my mom will take my phone or what(it's a precaution) I'll still be on tumblr and possibly twitter (whichever login I remember, I have ways to get on the internet) twitter @ mafiadaddygully  
> tumblr @ blue-impulse
> 
> hope y'all liked it!


	18. the end of an era pt 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is the flash part of the last chapter

ciscoramon: hiiii guys

poutypuppy: oh no

ciscoramon: it's not bad!

poutypuppy: thank rao

ciscoramon: but I did take the meta cure

poutypuppy: WHAT

sassysiren: you did WJAT

ciscoramon: it was a personal decision

ciscoramon: I just wanna be cisco

ciscoramon: and I wanna be known for way more than just being vibe

sassysiren: I'm proud of you surfer dude

notantman: his name is cisco

sassysiren: I KNOW

ciscoramon: I'm proud of you too miss screamer 

notantman: ahhh nicknames, got it

sassysiren: shut up fake ant man

notantman: aCtUaLlY

ciscoramon: anyways, I will still be part of team flash for anything they need, but I won't be vibe anymore

ciscoramon: we also saved nora from being erased in the timeline too

norawestallen: and this is how my brother comes in

norawestallen: probably

norawestallen: maybe

saralance: so I heard eobard came back

ciscoramon: yeahhh

saralance: did he ever say why he is still wearing wells' face?

ciscoramon: no but it's probably because it's the face that we all know him too well by

saralance: true

meanie: that bastard is still alive?

ciscoramon: unfortunately 

meanie: how come barry hasn't killed him

barryallen: I don't believe in it

meanie: ok speedy man

zarilovescharlie: mick I got donuts

meanie: I'm coming

poutypuppy: he's secretly a softie

dreamer: he's a good writer too

directorsharpe: oh good you got the book we sent you

norawestallen: I got it too!

barryallen: hopefully the city calms down a little, I need my summer break

poutypuppy: me too but we still have this lex problem 

barryallen: well I'm here if you need help

manofsteel: me too

poutypuppy: thanks guys but I think we got this

directordanvers: yeah we do

dreamer: we can do it!

saralance: so are you guys the only ones dealing with seasonal villains?

directordanvers: "seasonal villains"

poutypuppy: yeah sadly we are

saralance: any word on jax?

generallane: she should be home in the next few weeks

generallane: unless she is assigned to another job after her current

saralance: how likely is that?

generallane: well she just got a new rank so it's 25% more likely she'll be reassigned

generallane: hell in like 2 years she'll be moving up in rank again

emikoqueen: WEEKS???

generallane: unfortunately

emikoqueen: son of a bitch

dreamer: I could hear that

norawestallen: gta???

dreamer: actually

dreamer: I hear it, but I have no idea what it's from

norawestallen: every white cop in the desert part of the map

dreamer: ooooohhhhh sandy shores

norawestallen: yeah that one

dreamer: I like beating up cops

detectivesawyer: ahem

captaindrake: pardon

thedetective: ?

dreamer: in gta

emikoqueen: me and jax beat cops up together:/

saralance: are you in the depressed phase

emikoqueen: …..

emikoqueen: yes

saralance: mood

saralance: ava has been busy for the past 2 days

captaindrake: my baby just don't like me

sassysiren: hey I said we should talk about apartments!

alenathecomputer: y'all are cute

sassysiren: tyty

captaindrake: canaries by the beach

sassysiren: ou I like

mommad: I live in a house on the beach, there's one for sale nextdoor 

sassysiren: yes and we can bother you guys during Christmas

poutypuppy: no please don't 

sassysiren: love thy neighbor kara

demonspawn: my dorm is by the beach

sassysiren: you're in another country

barryallen: so what are you all planning on our hopeful time off?

saralance: me and ava want to take a vacation 

manofsteel: I'll be working on the farm all summer

iriswestallen: I wish barry would take me on a vacation

barryallen: we keep getting interrupted

iriswestallen: true🙄

sassysiren: every trip with the legends feels like a vacation

saralance: that's how we're total opposites 

jasontheman: hey where's zari

zarilovescharlie: I'm here

jasontheman: you should've auditioned for jasmine in aladdin

charlieloveszari: I second that

zarilovescharlie: awww you guys

charlieloveszari: you'd fit that role perfectly

directordanvers: omg yes!

 

girls night

 

iriswestallen: after the lex situation is over we need to MEET

poutypuppy: true

emikoqueen: shit isn't game night tomorrow

poutypuppy: yes:)))

directordanvers: iris and caitlin you are invited

directordanvers: and killer frost:))

caitlinsnow: I'm free tomorrow!

caitlinsnow: so is killer frost

poutypuppy: yes!

poutypuppy: sara and the gals you are invited too

poutypuppy added thegooddarhk

saralance: we still have a small issue so maybe another time 

thegooddarhk: awww I wanna go

thegooddarhk: wait where is your witch sister that I heard about

directordanvers: oh she's on a job rn in europe

thegooddarhk: ahh ok

detectivesawyer: I'm coming to game night

poutypuppy: oh good

poutypuppy: this chat is missing so many people 

poutypuppy added theotherolsensister, emopuppy, thedetective, mazequeen, evee, and ellaumbrella to the chat

emopuppy: how many chats do you have jesus 

mazequeen: don't bring that crackhead up

poutypuppy: anyways I'm having game night at my house tomorrow who's in

theotherolsensister: oo I'm in

thedetective: I could use some time off

mazequeen: tbh me too

evee: yeah bounty hunting is pretty hard

emopuppy: I have no choice in this?

poutypuppy: you're living with me until the lex situation dies down

emopuppy: shame

poutypuppy: see you ladies tomorrow night!

poutypuppy: I'll message you LA gals my address

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey y'all I'm not grounded lmao. hope you enjoyed the 2nd part. this summer I'm gonna try and post every week idk how long I'll be able to keep it up. 
> 
> have a good week!
> 
> tumblr @ blue-impulse   
> twitter@ mafiadaddygully


	19. why you gotta be so ruuuude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the superfriends finish off their seasonal villian WARNING MAJOR GAME OF THRONES SPOILER

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another warning there are SPOILERS for the series finale of game of thrones!!!

tattooedbitch: hi guys I'm on lunch

generallane: you're hiding in the bathroom aren't you

tattooedbitch: yes

sassysiren: it's a room full of white men isn't it

tattooedbitch: yes

emikoqueen: beat them up

tattooedbitch: I'm 2 seconds away from it

saralance: so lucy said that you got a new rank?

tattooedbitch: yeah I'm finally rid of being captain

saralance: so you're major now?

tattooedbitch: yeah, and in about 2 years I'll be lieutenant colonel

emikoqueen: that's my baby

directordanvers: you gonna be back soon?

tattooedbitch: we're about to wrap up the UN in a couple days but iran is threatening to start a war so I'm not very sure

tattooedbitch: see you all later

poutypuppy: fuck

emikoqueen: :,)

 

days later

 

emopuppy: Көмектесіңдер

saralance: what's wrong???

poutypuppy: what did she say

saralance: she said help

thegoodone: kaznia

thegoodone: they're gonna invade

thegoodone: and lex is gonna save us

poutypuppy: not on my watch

iriswestallen: yo go girl!

arsenal: kill em

directordanvers: see y'all later

sassysiren: when did you learn kaznian

saralance: it's like russian and kazakh

sassysiren: fair

iriswestallen: sounds like they're finishing off their seasonal villain

emikoqueen: so did any of y'all watch got

sassysiren: yeah

sassysiren: lmao kings landing ain't even fucking wheelchair accessible

oracle: you have something against wheelchairs?

sassysiren: no

emikoqueen: drogon was like "cmon daenerys let's go"

emikoqueen: and she was laying there like that one vine of the chick face down on her floor with the cha cha slide playing in the background

barryallen: ASFGAJKA THAT WASN'T FUNNY

emikoqueen: WATCHING THE VINE MAKES IT FUNNY

barryallen: I'll watch it🙄

barryallen: OK OK THAT WAS FUNNY 

emikoqueen: SEE SPEEDY BOY

sassysiren: one hop this time

iriswestallen: y'all are weird 

saralance: so did game night pan out correctly or what

thegooddarhk: yeah it was pretty fun

thegooddarhk: so many people tho

iriswestallen: we didn't get totally plastered

brucieboy: we feel left out

saralance: who cares

brucieboy: hey! this chat is supposed to bully oliver barry and clark!

saralance: and now you've been added to the bunch!

brucieboy: rude

saralance: where has the batfam been lately

brucieboy: we've been on vacation for a bit

katekane: they've been on vacation and I've been in the city

saralance: and you're just not a talkative person

katekane: nope

detectivesawyer: why is lex luthor a literal nazi

saralance: what are y'all fighting nazis without me

saralance: we've done it together before I thought u would've thought to invite us:/

detectivesawyer: wAIT 

detectivesawyer: YOU GUYS FOUGHT NAZI'S

saralance: yes that's when I slept with ur gf:))

detectivesawyer: oh okay

katekane: I feel the depression in that

detectivesawyer: well my gf is off fighting some superpowered nazi and I'm worried rn:/

theotherolsensister: wait is that where james is?

detectivesawyer: probably

detectivesawyer: I only saw kara alex and nia leave

detectivesawyer: they mentioned lena

theotherolsensister: okay

detectivesawyer: do they really expect me to stay here and do nothing

saralance: mood

saralance: also we're opening heyworld today wish us luck

detectivesawyer: please do better than we are

zarilovescharlie: I hope so

detectivesawyer: wait so I heard that dragon hatched

zarilovescharlie: yes!!!

detectivesawyer: zari tomaz, first of her name, goddess of wind, hacker of computers, legend of tomorrow, mother of dragon

zarilovescharlie: omg that almost made me cry

meanie: did you idiots spoil GOT for me earlier

sassysiren: this is a SPOILER ZONE

meanie: fine

sassysiren: I'm a professional sansa stark stan

barryallen: what about dany

sassysiren: unpopular opinion: I never really liked her

sassysiren: but I felt for her in the beginning seasons

barryallen: true

constantine: this season was horrible

emikoqueen: stop shitting on bran stark 2Kforever

constantine: same love

hornydevil: what is it with you mortals and that stupid show

mazequeen: hEY I LOVE GAME OF THRONES 

ellaumbrella: i love GOT but this season just ended too quickly

ellaumbrella: though I would not sign that dumb petition to redo it

thedetective: you literally signed it this morning????

ellaumbrella: lies

thedetective: YOU SENT ME AN EMAIL TO JOIN

ellaumbrella: I THOUGHT I DELETED IT

thedetective: got you!

ellaumbrella: rude

sassysiren: this chat vs saying rude 24/7

iriswestallen: you had to call us out like that

saralance: we're gonna dress up and do a commercial for heyworld

saralance: but come join the show ya'll it's in 2019!

brainy: you guys have to work something different out

saralance: why

brainy: I can't say much but what you guys are going to do is going to cause a big event is miss tomaz's life to change

brainy: so try not to show off your powers

zarilovescharlie: in my life?

brainy: correct, using your powers in front of the world will cause the anti meta act to not go into place

zarilovescharlie: meaning my brother would not have died

brainy: and you would've never met the legends or joined the team

saralance: change of plans

saralance: team meeting in 5

detectivesawyer: shouldn't you be helping nia and j'onn

brainy: supergirl is currently fighting lex, alex has arrested ben lockwood. we are practically done

detectivesawyer: ok

detectivesawyer: time to go home ig

detectivesawyer: maybe order food

iriswestallen: give alex all the cuddles

detectivesawyer: I will

sassysiren: I wanna mcdie

detectivesawyer: mcdont

sassysiren: dasgdhjsk

poutypuppy: hi guys!

sassysiren: hello

poutypuppy: guess what!

arsenal: you finally killed someone

thegoodone: oh I did the killing

arsenal: kara got her gf to do it, close enough

katekane: gf???

directordanvers: 👀

poutypuppy: lena isn't my girlfriend!

arsenal: okay my bad

thegoodone: what was that alex

directordanvers: nothing

thegoodone: what I thought

thegoodone: also you can thank my mother, she poisoned lex making him weaker

poutypuppy: I'll thank her

poutypuppy: she has redeemed herself don't say shit!

thegoodone: yeah lex quoted hitler and even she called him out on it

directordanvers: momma luthor has really changed

thegoodone: prison, what else can I say-momma L

sassysiren: is she hot

poutypuppy: LAUREL

sassysiren: wHAT

thegoodone sent a photo [cmr: luthorbitches]

sassysiren: ok milf

directordanvers: vilf

vasquez: fvilf

thegoodone: the last one???

vasquez: former villian I'd like to fuck

thegoodone: lmaoo

tattooedbitch: hi bitches

directordanvers: JAX

sassysiren: FINALLY

emikoqueen: please say you're coming home

tattooedbitch: welllll

tattooedbitch: no, it's in another country

tattooedbitch: and unfortunately I don't think it has cell service

emikoqueen: can I come with you??

tattooedbitch: it's business I'm sorry baby

emikoqueen: fuck

tattooedbitch: how are you?

emikoqueen: I'm okay

tattooedbitch: how's simmons?

emikoqueen: he's a puppy

tattooedbitch: he's that hyper huh?

emikoqueen: yeah

sassysiren: do all of your conversations sound this depressing?

tattooedbitch: ok change of plans

tattooedbitch: I need more stuff so I'll come home for a few hours, but I gotta go

emikoqueen: oh thank god

directordanvers: well while you were cleaning up the UN we cleaned up national city

poutypuppy: and the whole US

directordanvers: that too

tattooedbitch: danvers sisters!

directordanvers: WOOO

poutypuppy: yessir

iriswestallen: iconic

tattooedbitch: I saw that you went to game night

iriswestallen: yes! we missed you though

tattooedbitch: well you might have to get used to that for a little

tattooedbitch: I'm on my way to my apartment, I'll talk later!

arsenal: bye

 

 

generallane to tattooedbitch

 

generallane: there aren't any active missions for you👀👀👀

tattooedbitch: can you keep it quiet

generallane: yes

generallane: but is this gonna hurt a certain someone though?

tattooedbitch: emiko? no, that's why I don't want her with me. I don't need anyone getting involved with what I'm dealing with.

generallane: and what is that?

tattooedbitch: nothing, just don't say shit. you're already on thin ice knowing it's not even military stuff

generallane: promise me you'll keep your ass out of hell this time

tattooedbitch: lmao I promise shithead

generallane: bye dummy

tattooedbitch: see yah

 

 

unknown to tattooedbitch

 

unknown: you have 24 hours, ja'as

tattooedbitch: I know

tattooedbitch: but are you ever gonna tell me who you are?

unknown: you know who I am, but soon you'll just know the leviathan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi ya'll! I have keystones this week so the next chapter probably won't come until Monday unless I have one of those nights where I write a whole chapter in 2 hours. also! they brought up leviathan on supergirl!!!! in the comics they were an offshoot of the league of assassins and they were fronted by TALIA. they appeared in supergirl many times so maybe they're introducing the earth 38 talia!! and of course I'm going to make LEMONADE WITH MY LEMONS. LOTS OF LEMONADE.  
> also I posted that dany meme on my tumblr   
> tumblr: blue-impulse  
> twitter: mafiadaddygully


	20. the lurker, the horny, and the brooding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this is a mess

poutypuppy: goodmorning all

tattooedbitch: it's 6 am wtf kara

poutypuppy: well since we all finished our seasonal villains we're all here

tattooedbitch: I'm sorry but jax has to go

saralance: emiko said NOT TODAY

poutypuppy: mood

poutypuppy: who wants to get breakfast

katekane: I'm free

thegoodone: who

directordanvers: look who's doing it this time luthor

poutypuppy: doing what

thegoodone: nothing

thegoodone: fuck u alex

 

lgbt vigilante morons

 

saralance: ok ok are we team lena or team kate

directordanvers: this is a hard one

sassysiren: kate to corrupt her, then lena

directordanvers: "corrupt" THAT'S MY SISTER

katekane: I'm literally in this chat

saralance: and i oop

katekane: I'll just excuse myself 

sassysiren: yeah go get ready for breakfast

katekane: also, I'm with rene

saralance: lena is now back in the race!

directordanvers: wait I forgot about that

katekane: duhhhhh

sassysiren: damn

 

arrowverse chat

 

arsenal: I actually like this chat

sassysiren: good

sassysiren: also is jax gone yet or are her and emiko still shagging

emikoqueen: she left a few minutes ago

sassysiren: that bitch didn't say bye

tattooedbitch: well I'm DRIVING

tattooedbitch: but byeeee

arsenal: see ya

sassysiren: bye dummy

directordanvers: bye sis

poutypuppy: love you

emikoqueen: and now I go idk how long without sex

sassysiren: fuck yourself

emikoqueen: doing it alone isn't fun tho

saralance: that's what I say when ava isn't home

constantine: there is a spell to make people undone

emikoqueen: hmmm

saralance: wait doesn't jax have that little smart thing on her arm where she can record and check cams and shit

emikoqueen: yeah

saralance: do that

emikoqueen: true

norawestallen: like IQ?

emikoqueen: not exactly

norawestallen: oh ok

iriswestallen: wait isn't that considered phone sex

saralance: yes? maybe?

poutypuppy: so what are we gonna do now that it's summer

barryallen: I was just thinking that

thegoodone: well remember I do have a beach house

poutypuppy: ****several

thegoodone: yea

barryallen: I might go to coast city

iriswestallen: we******

barryallen: yea that

brucieboy: say hi to hal for me

barryallen: who

generallane: hey I know him

generallane: well earth 38 him

brucieboy: did you meet in the military?

generallane: yep, he was a pilot if I remember

generallane: ask jax

brucieboy: yeah I'll ask in the 5 months when she comes back

emikoqueen: MONTHS

saralance: let's change the subject!

emikoqueen: my saviour

saralance: me and ava are going to dinner tonight

saralance: what are y'alls plans

detectivesawyer: me and alex are going on a double date

captaindrake: with us!

saralance: yeehaw

barryallen: we're doing team bonding 

killerfrost: sadly

poutypuppy: it's probably just gonna be a normal night for me

emikoqueen: same

charlieloveszari: same with us

notantman: jax is having a barbecue so me nate and nora are going to central city

barryallen: say hi to him for us!

notantman: will do

saralance: we have two jax's lmao

saralance: we should add him

barryallen: I can feel oliver yelling at us for this

saralance has added jjackson

jjackson: you have a superhero chat WITHOUT ME?????

jjackson: i see how it is

saralance: well ur a dad now so we thought to leave you be

jjackson: i wanna be in touch with u idiots

barryallen: jax!

poutypuppy: hi it's your favorite kryptonian!

jjackson: barry! kara!

poutypuppy: how's life?

jjackson: I have a kid, so it's a rodeo

ciscoramon: martina right?

jjackson: yep! she looks just like me

barryallen: dad squad!!!

jjackson: wait really?????

barryallen: she's from the future

jjackson: of course

norawestallen: 👋👋

jjackson: after your mother

barryallen: yep

barryallen: she's just like her mom tho

iriswestallen: no no, she's just like you bar

saralance: I 2nd that

poutypuppy: I 3rd that

manofsteel: everyone agrees

jjackson: I bet

jjackson: anways, dad duty calls. see y'all at dinner!

saralance: man I miss him

saralance: and stein

saralance: and snart

barryallen: earth x snart!

saralance: hhhdhhhhhh

directorsharpe: she's depressed now

ciscoramon: you disappeared for a bit

directorsharpe: am I the only one who works for a living around here?

sassysiren: yeah we get it you still have a job

emikoqueen: still sorry about that

sassysiren: and I forgave you for it

detectivesawyer: hey I have a job

thegoodone: me too

poutypuppy: me three

directordanvers: me four

dreamer: me five

vasquez: sadly me six

jasontheman: mood

vasquez: also I just realized 

vasquez: crabby patties were made from crab?????

poutypuppy: WHAT

vasquez: also did you notice how the krusty krab was a lobster trap

vasquez sent a photo [cmr: krustykomparison]

poutypuppy: I need to take a moment to process this

directordanvers: you never knew this?????

dreamer: DOES IT LOOK LIKE SHE KNEW THIS

directordanvers: lmaoo

sassysiren: that's the funniest thing I've seen all day

captaindrake: other than me falling off our bed butt naked

dreamer: video or it didn't happen

sassysiren: I have it somewhere

barryallen: please don't accidentally send a nude

sassysiren: I WOULD NEVER send a nude to the whole chat

barryallen: 🤦♀️🤦♀️

sassysiren sent a video [cmr: wheezing]

thegoodone: BEST THING EVER

captaindrake: man I do have a nice ass

sassysiren: yeah you do

saralance: that reminds me of a certain someone

directordanvers: shut it lance

saralance: I didn't get it on video tho

detectivesawyer: alex does that 24/7

saralance: so it wasn't just me?

detectivesawyer: nope

saralance: 🤦♀️

directordanvers: WHAT I'M CLUMSY OKAY

dreamer: WE GET IT YOU SLEPT TOGETHER NOW GET OVER IT

norawestallen: mood

norawestallen: also I'm still gonna be in chat but I'm heading back to the future!

notantman: GREAT MOVIE

saralance: see yah mini west-allen

dreamer: bye nora!

directordanvers: it was fun letting you ruin my couch

norawestallen: thanks for kicking me out of your apartment to have sex

directordanvers: touche

timnottheturner: byeee

norawestallen: where have you been

timnottheturner: we're on vacation

barryallen: of course🙄

timnottheturner: hey at least we stopped most crime in our city

barryallen: but then there wouldn't be no work

katekane: you're literally a cop

timnotturner: AND I SAID MOST

katekane: and by we he means me

barryallen: am I olivers bully replacement?

saralance: no we're just after men with kids

brucieboy: oh no

manofsteel: :○

sassysiren: lmaooo

manofsteel: both of the lance sisters are trouble 

sassysiren: you don't say

saralance: so are the queen sisters!

saralance: also where is thea???

speedyqueen: lurking

speedyqueen: where's emiko?

saralance: she's brooding because her girlfriend is in another country

speedyqueen: my boyfriend is in another one too

saralance: wait I thought you slept with alex

directordanvers: we wanted you to think we slept together

arsenal: we been knew

barryallen: wait for once I didn't believe you guys!!

speedyqueen: FINALLY 

iriswestallen: he was literally jumping with joy

emikoqueen: oh great the kid is here

demonspawn: what it's not like you're having sex

demonspawn: and plus i know jax told you that i'm moving in come summer, and well it's summer

poutypuppy: wait are you switching schools?

demonspawn: yeah

demonspawn: there's league trouble that's why I moved here and she's over in saudi taking care of it

emikoqueen: WAIT WHAT

demonspawn: did i say something

emikoqueen: she's taking care of league business?????

demonspawn: yup i said something

poutypuppy: damian tell us everything

demonspawn: she'll kill me!

directordanvers: damian please

demonspawn: she told me that she had to go take care of some business that's all

demonspawn: I never ask because I don't wanna know

generallane: thank god someone else spilled

emikoqueen: YOU KNEW????

generallane: of course

generallane: i only knew cus i know when she's deployed, and she wasn't being deployed

emikoqueen: fuck

emikoqueen: is she in danger?

demonspawn: it's the league, you never know

demonspawn: she's a very dangerous assassin and a powerful witch, she can protect herself

emikoqueen: it's just that she said there was a rise in witch hunters and I'm worried

demonspawn: look it's not like my mom or grandpa are gonna come back from the dead and try to kill her or anything

hornydevil: stupid mortals

emikoqueen: WHAT

hornydevil: oh it's nothing

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wassup peeps I'm back with another mess of a chapter. I hope y'all are having a good start to summer(if it's starting) I get out next week and I'm going to go see Sammy Hagar with my uncle this Friday so I'll probably get some writing in during the trip so I'll finish up my tumblr prompts.
> 
> anyways hope you enjoy and please comment I'd like to know what ya'll think!!  
> tumblr @ blue-impulse


	21. imma dip my balls in sum thousand dollar dressin, cause i got depression

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> fuck

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the name of the chapter, yes you read it correctly (zach fox is a MOOD)

poutypuppy: so what's our plan

emikoqueen: we wait for signs that she's in danger

poutypuppy: thats your plan?????

emikoqueen: I believe in her

emikoqueen: I trust that she can handle herself

poutypuppy: she's out there alone and you trust she's okay against a CRIMINAL ORGANIZATION

emikoqueen: yes

demonspawn: I trust she's okay

generallane: me too

manofsteel: yeah me three

lilrickie: she's the reason me and the rest of us are alive to this day

timmytwoknives: yeah

hornydevil: oh are we doing sweet little things about jax? well I guess I'll join this

poutypuppy: I get the point now I don't need more

hornydevil: ooohhh really?

hornydevil: is it because I'm the bloody devil?

hornydevil: do you have something against me miss steel girl

poutypuppy: u know what go ahead

hornydevil: I will not follow your mortal rules

hornydevil: I AM LUCIFER MORNINGSTAR

hornydevil: THE KING OF HELL

hornydevil: I will do as I please

thedetective: you good

hornydevil: oh just peachy

sassysiren: and he was not peachy

poutypuppy: I think I pissed him off?

emikoqueen: no shit

hornydevil: it would just be great if I could join in on your silly little shenanigans once in awhile, it's quite lonely in hell

dreamer: me in highschool except no one liked me

hornydevil: oh that too

hornydevil: I also have many bullies here, not fun

dreamer: bully beater squad?

hornydevil: ohhh sounds good

dreamer: YEEHAW

generallane: hey uh emiko can I talk to you on the farm

emikoqueen: sure, I'm in the pasture

generallane: omw

demonspawn: uh oh

thedetective: huh

demonspawn: the ex gf and current gf are conspiring

generallane: shut up child

demonspawn: don't text and drive!

hornydevil: and I won't resurrect you

generallane: ugh rude

directordanvers: that's what texting and driving gives you!

caitlinsnow: you do it all the time

directordanvers: CAITLIN

detectivesawyer: YOU EXPOSED HER BEFORE ME

wondergirl: woah you're exposing without me

directordanvers: you're the one who disappeared from the chat

wondergirl: well that's what happens when you go back home

directordanvers: themyscira????

wondergirl: yes, me and donna went

dovenotthesoap: it was amazing

directordanvers: well we're glad you guys are back the chat is boring

wondergirl: ah yes you need us

directordanvers: uh yeah

dovenotthesoap: so everyone is done their seasonal villians?

directordanvers: YOU TOO????

dovenotthesoap: no lmao I was just catching up on what I missed

directordanvers: thank god

hornydevil: ah yes please keep sucking fathers dick

directordanvers: ….. thank rao..?

hornydevil: he isn't too good either

directordanvers: don't say that to kara

poutypuppy: WHO SAID WHAT ABOUT MY GOD

hornydevil: and that's when I say

hornydevil: FUCK YOUR GOD

poutypuppy: im gonna go worry again

emikoqueen: WHAT THE FUCK IT'S JUNE ALREADY 

dreamer: yeah tonight is the pride parade!

emikoqueen: we were gonna go

tattooedbitch: and we mwight mKae iy

emikoqueen: YOU BASTARD ARE YOU OKAY

tattooedbitch: no

emikoqueen: where

tattooedbitch: mu watcg

tattooedbitch: i blwedin

demonspawn: HER WATCH SCANS HER LOCATION

emikoqueen: kara dami suit up we're going

lilrickie: is she okay???

emikoqueen: NO

lilrickie: tim stay back and pick cass and steph up from school I'm going to earth 38

kitty: what about me

lilrickie: watch over tim

kitty: okay

poutypuppy: meet at my apartment

poutypuppy: oh and someone tell james I'm not going to work

dreamer: okay

poutypuppy: i trust you and linda to take care of town

emopuppy: woah ok

emopuppy: #blessed

wondergirl: what was that

emopuppy: I've been learning the american way

wondergirl: hm ok

directordanvers: you better bring my sister back alive

demonspawn: oh I will

detectivesawyer: bring em both back!

demonspawn: no one cares about me

lilrickie: I can't believe I'm letting you go

demonspawn: well I'm just better than you

tattooedbitch: dam

tattooedbitch: no

tattooedbitch: come

lilrickie: what

lilrickie: are you talking about damian

tattooedbitch: cant comew

demonspawn: I'M FUCKING COMING YOU DUMB COW

tattooedbitch: no

lilrickie: if it's what she wants it's best if you stay

demonspawn: what the fuck richard

dreamer: i know we're being serious but ASDHFJAAKK

lilrickie: please dami

demonspawn: fine

demonspawn: but if you don't bring her back in one piece I'm killing all of you

lilrickie: deal, gotta go

directordanvers: stay safe

directordanvers: but how is mom getting here hmm

cksteel: I'LL GET HER

directordanvers: waIT

directordanvers: nevermind look who's already here 

directordanvers: fucking super speed

wondergirl: so uhhhhh clark I heard you know my sister

manofsteel: I met her a few times on my trips to earth 1

wondergirl: well she would like in

manofsteel: chat?

saralance: got my clear 

directordanvers: kara would say yes

manofsteel: go ahead

 

wondergirl has added wonderwoman to the chat

manofsteel: hi diana!

wonderwoman: hello clark!!!

manofsteel: how are you?

wonderwoman: I'm great, and you?

manofsteel: it's been a long day

directordanvers: clark can you like come get your son

manofsteel: that's where he went???

directordanvers: yes I needed mom here because kara emiko and rick are going to save jax so he flew and dropped her off and he won't leave

manofsteel: is jax alright????

directordanvers: i don't know

manofsteel: me and lois will be over right away

directordanvers: i need a nap

generallane: I'm flying in, I'll be there soon I promise

wonderwoman: well you guys must be busy

directordanvers: unfortunately

wonderwoman: are you kara's sister?

directordanvers: yes

wonderwoman: oh she's here? I haven't talked in forever

wonderwoman: it's been quite a bit since greece

directordanvers: wait

directordanvers: you were in greece with her?

wonderwoman: yes, she came to earth one and we originally met in central city but I convinced her to come to greece with me

directordanvers: she said she was with a guy named dean….

wondergirl: DID YOUR SISTER SLEEP WITH MY SISTER

wonderwoman: we made love a couple times, it was just the summer though

directordanvers: I'm going to FAINT

detectivesawyer: KARA PUPPY DANVERS HAS HAD SEX WITH A WOMAN

wondergirl: a goddess actually

detectivesawyer: a real woman

thegoodone: I knew she had it in her

wonderwoman: I don't know what the big deal is, love is love

detectivesawyer: oh there's nothing wrong with that we're all mostly gay here

wonderwoman: I fit well I guess

sassiesnark: hey guys

cksteel: cassie!!!

sassiesnark: how are you guys

cksteel: we're okay, just waiting on kara

directordanvers: it's been a looooong day

detectivesawyer: I TOLD YOU TO SLEEP

directordanvers: I AM

detectivesawyer: YOU ARE NOT

sassiesnark: yea I just read what I missed, you guys okay?

dreamer: we're just waiting on news

sassiesnark: well let us know if we can do anything

dreamer: will do

 

four hours later

 

poutypuppy: we're on our way home please prep the med bay jax is badly hurt

directordanvers: on it

demonspawn: I'm COMING

timmytwoknives: rick???

lilrickie: we're all okay except jax, just please stay on earth 18

timmytwoknives: okay

speedyqueen: is emiko okay????

lilrickie: jax is the only one hurt

speedyqueen: I meant emotionally

lilrickie: we're all hurting

lilrickie: ok we're at the deo but I'm not allowed into her room

dreamer: ok what the fuck

iriswestallen: is everything okay I just read everything????

dreamer: we're going inactive for a little

iriswestallen: is jax alright?????

barryallen: oh no

sassysiren: wth is going on guys

speedyqueen: they just brought jax to the deo but they won't say anything

saralance: what the fuuuuck

norawestallen: I hope everything is okay

vasquez: guys

saralance: SUSAN

vasquez: it's not looking too good

iriswestallen: no

iriswestallen: nonono

constantine: sara just told me, do you need my assistance?

vasquez: stay by your phone

arsenal: oh no

barryallen: how's kara and alex in all of this

vasquez: they're keeping it together

vasquez: but I can't say the same about rick damian and emiko

saralance: fuck

sassysiren: what the fuck is this LIFE

captaindrake: we'll stand by

speedyqueen: wait how is eliza?

vasquez: she's really the strongest out of us all

vasquez: i have to go again, talk soon

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi y'all.. hope you are enjoying yourselves and hopefully you are out of school(also if u graduated, CONGRATS) today was my last day of school so I'm excited to keep writing all summer. anyways please leave a comment!!!
> 
> also I need more people to talk about DC!! please don't be afraid to message me on tumblr or twitter!!  
> tumblr @ blue-impulse  
> twitter @ mafiadaddygully


	22. oh shit a rat!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> like a pt 2 from the last chapter

poutypuppy: i have updates

saralance: SPILL PLEASE I'M WORRIED SICK

poutypuppy: she's suffering from major blood loss and hemorrhaging from the many stab wounds and cuts. whatever they used it's making her weak and she can't heal herself.

poutypuppy: alex mom and dr hamilton have put her into a medically induced coma.

poutypuppy: there's not a lot they can do.

saralance: oh no

thegooddarhk: I think I can do something

poutypuppy: please

thegooddarhk: I'm bringing john, but I need you to do some shopping real fast

saralance: are you doing A RITUAL 

thegooddarhk: IT'S MEDICINE

thegooddarhk sent a note from googlenotes

poutypuppy: LAMB BLOOD

thegooddarhk: bitch if you want your sister to live hurry tf up

poutypuppy: I'm going I'm going 

saralance: they're leaving now

saralance: keep us updated

barryallen: please, we're free so we can be over in a flash

sassysiren: not the FUCKING JOKES

barryallen: I PANICKED

dreamer: I'm getting lunch for the crew someone PLEASE come with me

detectivesawyer: I'm staying with alex rn

thegoodone: I'll come

dreamer: thANK YOU

detectivesawyer: oh thea alex said your forms went through

speedyqueen: I'M COMING

speedyqueen: TOOK HR LONG ENOUGH

dreamer: don't mess with pam she's scary

speedyqueen: I need to be there for my sister excuse me

barryallen: we can't lose anymore people

brainy: yes you are correct

saralance: where tf did u come from

brainy: everywhere

barryallen: wdym

brainy: all I can say is we will need everyone we can get come fall

barryallen: okaaay

saralance: not the time to be creepy alien robot dude

 

an hour later

 

poutypuppy: jax is stable, the bleeding stopped and thanks to nora, she's slowly healing.

saralance: thank satan

hornydevil: oh you've changed

saralance: I knew you would've yelled at me

hornydevil: true true

hornydevil: kara dear, tell jax that she better not be visiting me in hell any time soon or I'll send her to heaven

poutypuppy: i- i will

poutypuppy: "she doesn't want to talk to you" EXCUSE

saralance: she wants to talk to emiko probably lmaoo

poutypuppy: yeahhh

sassysiren: but while we have you dear kara

sassysiren: sweet sweet innocent

sassysiren: not so straight kara

poutypuppy: where is this going 

sassysiren: take a guess

wonderwoman: kara!

poutypuppy: diana!!!!

thegoodone: who's this bitch

sassysiren: so you really are THAT OBLIVIOUS

poutypuppy: now what

wonderwoman: they may or may not of put the pieces together

poutypuppy: O

emikoqueen: jax saw the look on kara's face and she's trying so badly not to rip the stitches from laughing

poutypuppy: 🤷

wonderwoman: you got us

saralance: so what the doc say

emikoqueen: we can't have sex until her powers come back and she's able to fully heal herself

saralance: so you're depressed

emikoqueen: I have my girlfriend in my arms alive and safe, that's all that matters

barryallen: i shed a tear

iriswestallen: more than a tear

poutypuppy: am i not gonna be able to talk to her or what

emikoqueen: i promised her that i wouldn't leave her side, you can talk but I'll be here

poutypuppy: okay

mommad: can my girls PLEASE stop trying to give me heart attacks for TWO SECONDS

directordanvers: we're SORRY OKAY

sassysiren: we were worried too u know

mommad: you'll learn what I mean when you become a mother

captaindrake: which is probably not far away

sassysiren: keep talking, rings still expensive as fuuuck

thegoodone: there are plenty of rich people here willing to drop over 20k for y'all

sassysiren: GREAT NOW SHE'S ACTUALLY THINKING

emikoqueen: if me and jax ever get married I know that bitch is gonna be expensive

generallane: wait does she still have that drawer of chains watches and bracelets

emikoqueen: YES

emikoqueen: she lets me wear some of them

generallane: LUCKY ASS

generallane: she once threw a dagger at me for even looking at them

emikoqueen: I'm special

emikoqueen: i was gonna say something dirty but imma leave that since i know the kids active

saralance: LGBT CHAT

 

lgbt vigilante morons

 

emikoqueen: my panties ain't the only thing dripping when I'm with jax

saralance: OOOOUUUUU

timnottheturner: ok damn

sassysiren: ok bitch we flexing now?

emikoqueen: I'm flexing with my girlfriends stuff yes

sassysiren: we see you

generallane: jax is literally an eboy how many lock chains does she have

emikoqueen: 2

emikoqueen: gold then the silver one

generallane: typical

sassysiren: emiko why you still talking to us go chill with ur girl 

emikoqueen: kara kicked me out of the room

emikoqueen: I'm going to go get us lunch

sassysiren: ain't it raining over there

emikoqueen: she gave me her truck keys

olliequeen: can you even drive

emikoqueen: yes dummy

olliequeen: ugh rude

emikoqueen: I've literally almost hit you with my motorcycle twice and you're asking if I can drive

olliequeen: I'M TIRED OKAY

emikoqueen: how's the baby

olliequeen: healthy ig, safe in the belly

emikoqueen: I meant felicity jasdfghkl

olliequeen: oh she's doing good

emikoqueen: that's good

olliequeen: how's jax?

emikoqueen: she's good, getting a hell of a talking-to tho

olliequeen: I assume you gave her one already 

emikoqueen: yes, in tears tho

olliequeen: gasp you're soft!

emikoqueen: you're soft too you little bitch

speedyqueen: I'm not

olliequeen: bitch even I saw how you looked at laurel

sassysiren: and i oop

olliequeen: other laurel

sassysiren: wbk it's just tea

saralance: wait it's the queen siblings arguing for once????

detectivesawyer: I said that in my head lmaoo

directordanvers: rude

detectivesawyer: also what happened to ava

directorsharpe: I'm lurking

detectivesawyer: we need to change ur name sweetie

detectivesawyer changed directorsharpe to timeboss

timeboss: eh I like it 

detectivesawyer: "eh"

saralance: she's emotionless 

timeboss: YOU WERE TOO

sassysiren: spoiler alert they were both emotionless pre relationship and now they're soft idiots

captaindrake: that's us too babe

sassysiren: the exposure

olliequeen: lmao

olliequeen: i miss you guys

sassysiren: I lowkey miss you too

captaindrake: same

arsenal: I came back right when y'all ended it

barryallen: we miss you too ollie 

olliequeen: we should meet up sometime

arsenal: does john like that idea

olliequeen: no

arsenal: lmaooo

barryallen: he is one of the og hoes tho so he knows what he's talking about

speedyqueen: og hoes lmao

barryallen: it's true!

barryallen: why isn't john in the chat

reneramirez: he doesn't wanna deal with our shenanigans

katekane: that's how alfred is

thegooddarhk: wasn't my dad an og villain hoe

olliequeen: yes

olliequeen: sadly

thegooddarhk: good thing I'm not like him

thegooddarhk: y'all would be screwed

olliequeen: …….

emikoqueen: she's kidding right????

thegooddarhk: i saved ur gf don't try and shade me

emikoqueen: truce

poutypuppy: I'm taking jax home so emiko just head there

emikoqueen: ok

directordanvers: im take nap

detectivesawyer: I'm making her take one

demonspawn: I need one too

lilrickie: me too

saralance: soooo how's life

lilrickie: okay now I guess

saralance: you guess?

saralance: what's up

lilrickie: nothing

saralance: okay mr meanie bear

lilrickie: ??

saralance: nothing

barryallen: also what happened to that duck

emikoqueen: jerry? he left

barryallen: uhhhh left?

emikoqueen: yeah idk what happened

emikoqueen: talk later guys

sassysiren: see yah

katekane: hey guys

generallane: howdy 

katekane: I think I'm officially on vacation

generallane: lucky ass

generallane: I'm stuck doing rookie work

vasquez: well maybe a certain someone DESERVES IT

generallane: bitch

vasquez: square up

generallane: I'm coming for you

vasquez: ok bitch

vasquez: where u wanna fight

generallane: I'm coming to the the main floor bitch be ready 

vasquez: oHHHH SHIT

vasquez: A RAT

saralance: BITCH I'M WHEEZING

dreamer: I FELL OUT OF MY CHAIR

ellaumbrella: LMAOOOO

cksteel sent a video [vdr: ohshit]

dreamer: LUCY LOOKS LIKE SHE'S PEEING HERSELF

brainy: i hate humans

vasquez: rude!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi y'all! I've been getting messages and seeing comments about missing some characters so I'm gonna make some of the main talkers dissapear to make it easier to write (the batfam will be coming back from vacation) anyways hope you enjoyed and feel free to leave a comment!  
> wanna talk dc comics/tv hmu on twitter (@ mafiadaddygully) or tumblr (@ blue-impulse)


	23. supercorp the supreme ship

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> vacation!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> this is like a week later than the last chapter

tattooedbitch: good morning

poutypuppy: you guys packed yet or did you get…. occupied

tattooedbitch: rude of you to assume

poutypuppy: it's true though!

tattooedbitch: damn u right

barryallen: packed for what exactly?

tattooedbitch: me and emiko are going to italy, greece, then japan.

barryallen: woahhhh

iriswestallen: send pics!

olliequeen: hey at least you don't have any business

emikoqueen: uhhhh knock on wood

tattooedbitch: yeah we're making a fast stop in italy for business then going full vacay

iriswestallen: don't forget about us 

tattooedbitch: we'll send pics and updates but see y'all later!

emikoqueen: and don't touch our suits

tattooedbitch: but call if you need assistance

olliequeen: woah

olliequeen: the chats kinda quiet

brucieboy: they go on vacation after we come back??? damn they hate us that bad

olliequeen: yes

brucieboy: RUDE!!!

katekane: literal child

brucieboy: I saw you and selina earlier and you're calling me a child

spoilergoesbrrrr: ok but for like 2 actual minutes we thought she was an actual cat

brucieboy: idiots

katekane: you're still the idiot🙄

dickthedick: hey is rainbow bat coming back for pride

brucieboy: of course

poutypuppy: wait who's selina

brucieboy: you know the kitty girl from jax's chat

poutypuppy: yeah

brucieboy: she's from earth one

kitty: said kitty girl is here

brucieboy: and now she hangs at the mansion like 24/7

kitty: you said I was allowed!!!

katekane: bitch I've owned the mansion since bruce LEFT US FOR YEARS

brucieboy: WELL I'M BACK

katekane: and I'm not signing it over

brucieboy: RUDE

detectivesawyer: can we not say rude every 2 seconds

timnottheturner: but it's in our vocabulary

dickthedick: yeah

directordanvers: oh no is the batfam back

spoilergoesbrrrr: yes

spoilergoesbrrrr: and we're here for caos

dreamer: i wanna live with the batfam

brucieboy: 👀

brucieboy: I can arrange it

katekane: YOU'RE NOT ADOPTING ANYONE ELSE

poutypuppy: SHE'S OURS

brucieboy: fineeee

brucieboy: you can spend the summer here though 

katekane: YOU JUST YELLED ABOUT SELINA STAYING 

brucieboy: we gonna FIGHT?

katekane: come at me bitch

norawestallen: woah kenny!

vasquez: that happened in my fight they can't use it 

katekane: is this another song thing

norawestallen sent a link [spotify.com/squareup/zachfoxprodkennybeats]

dickthedick: isn't he the dude who sang about dipping his u kno what into thousand island dressing

norawestallen: aCtuAlLy it's the jesus song but yes

dickthedick: he's funny

norawestallen: he's suspended on twitter rn so I'm depressed without him

dickthedick: you have me!

norawestallen: it's sad to say I have to depend on the batfam

dreamer: BURRRRN

dickthedick: at least we don't f up time like the flashfam

norawestallen: fuuuuck you

norawestallen: I know you're actually a little bitch

barryallen: i- she gets it from her mom

brucieboy: kids don't fight

katekane: you were trying to start a fight earlier

barryallen: YEAH 

olliequeen: oh great

brucieboy: HEY HE LEFT Y'ALL TOO

katekane: AT LEAST HE DID IT TO PROTECT HIS FAMILY

brucieboy: ….

manofsteel: you guys are literally idiots

manofsteel: DUMB ADULTS

manofsteel: fuck

thebetterlane: clark sweetie u good

manofsteel: i am now

poutypuppy: you just got told!

manofsteel: I've been away from home too long

ciscoramon: are you far from home?

manofsteel: is that a spiderman joke

ciscoramon: YES AND I'VE BEEN WAITING TO MAKE IT

barryallen: teehee

thegoodone: hi nerds

barryallen: hi lena!

thegoodone: me and kara are going to the beach, do you and iris wanna join us?

iriswestallen: double date?

thegoodone: eye-

directordanvers: you broke her

poutypuppy: I'D LOVE A DOUBLE DATE

saralance: ok cute

katekane: #teamsupercorp

 

get supercorp together kru

 

directordanvers: YES

directordanvers: but who has to do with this

mommad: me!

iriswestallen: DAFDGDKAKA TEA

mommad: we do own a beach house Alexandra.

mommad: plus have you SEEN the way they look at each other

katekane: i love you eliza

mommad: i love you too bat

brucieboy: hey I'm a bat too!

katekane: an irrelevant one might I add

brucieboy: but here's the thing BITCH

directordanvers: stop FIGHTING THIS IS A GET KARA AND LENA TOGETHER CHAT NOT CHILDS PLAY

 

arrowverse chat

 

poutypuppy: why'd this chat go silent

directordanvers: busy ig

wondergirl: some of us just forget about this chat

thelonglostolsen: or some of us just ignore this chat

poutypuppy: oh okay

poutypuppy: well me and lena are driving to midvale rn!!!

saralance: have lots of sex!

directordanvers: SARA DELETE THAT

saralance has deleted a message

olliequeen: i fucking saw that

demonspawn: me too

directordanvers: children

demonspawn: oooohhhh auntie kara

directordanvers: listen here you little shit

demonspawn: I'm telling jax

 

demonspawn to tattooedbitch

 

demonspawn: your sister called me a little shit

tattooedbitch: and?

demonspawn: DO SOMETHING

tattooedbitch: you little devil

 

arrowverse chat

 

tattooedbitch: which one of my dear sisters called damian a little shit

olliequeen: IT WAS ALEX

tattooedbitch: he's A CHILD

tattooedbitch: he also knows 100 different ways to kill you and many in your sleep

tattooedbitch: now back to my FUCKING VACATION

directordanvers: love u?

demonspawn: I really am a little devil hehe

tattooedbitch: please don't text me unless it's an emergency PLEASE

directordanvers: fine go have sex with ur gf 

tattooedbitch: i- ugh bye

barryallen: we beat kara and lena to the beach house

iriswestallen: he didn't run!

directordanvers: cisco?

ciscoramon: at least someone credits me!

directordanvers: i always know!

detectivesawyer: alex can you get to your appartment like now

olliequeen: looks like someone is getting some!

hornydevil: that didn't sound too much like a getting some kinda tone

charlieloveszari: pray for her

wonderwoman: uh oh

katekane: maggie sawyer is one bad bitch, I know from experience

brucieboy: yeah she is

dickthedick: she's my partner rn!

katekane: WHAT

dickthedick: yeah I'd keep away from the bathouse for a lil

katekane: RENEE IS AT THE BATHOUSE

wonderwoman: are you saying bath-house or bat-house

dickthedick: bat house

dickthedick: it's literally easy to read

wonderwoman: not when the grammar is incorrect

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hi so many people are going on vacation so enjoy the people we don't hear much from! mostly the next chapter.  
> Twitter @ mafiadaddygully   
> Tumblr @ blue-impulse


	24. fucking americans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oliver has learned a lot

dovenotthesoap: hi guys

olliequeen: good morning 

dovenotthesoap: did kara get laid

wonderwoman: hopefully

olliequeen: team supercorp?

wonderwoman: team supercorp.

iriswestallen: I heard screaming last night

directordanvers: WHAT

barryallen: they saw a spider

olliequeen: BITCH

iriswestallen: yeah, I had to come get it

directordanvers: not gonna lie you got us in the first half

thebetterlane: is oliver becoming involved with shipping?

olliequeen: honey I have been silently shipping

detectivesawyer: you're an official queen™

saralance: thea and emiko are shaking

speedyqueen: puh-lease

speedyqueen: I've had it for YEARS the only one who needs to catch up is emiko

olliequeen: I could feel an eye roll or judgmental noise

speedyqueen: no, jax softened up that butter

speedyqueen: she isn't the queen of thorns anymore

saralance: she used to be thorny now she's horny

olliequeen: THAT'S MY SISTER

emikoqueen sent a photo [cmr:beach]

olliequeen: I'm jealous

emikoqueen: yes my girlfriend is gorgeous

olliequeen: YOU KNOW WHAT I MEANT 

tattooedbitch: I have a little loft overlooking the ocean if you and felicity ever want to use it

olliequeen: we'd love to but u know our deal

tattooedbitch: earth 38 silly

tattooedbitch: but it's literally surrounded by the mafia, you'd be safe

felicitysmoak: MAFIA

demonspawn: I'll have you know my uncles are very sweet and they love children

felicitysmoak: I'm assured?

demonspawn sent a photo [cmr:4unclesandababy] 

felicitysmoak: AWWW IS THAT BABY YOU

demonspawn: I knew I shouldn't of sent that

detectivesawyer: he's baby!

saralance: LIL BABY

iriswestallen: he da baby

dreamer: so @emikoqueen how does it feel to be dating a milf

tattooedbitch: DID YOU JUST CALL ME A MILF

emikoqueen: it's the best

felicitysmoak: am I a milf yet?

williamofqueens: EYE-

felicitysmoak: wait this isn't the supercorp chat

tattooedbitch: I'm here of course it's not

lildanvers: what's supercorp

saralance: NOTHING

thegoodone: hm ok

lildanvers: weirdoes

lildanvers: wait jax you're back?

tattooedbitch: we're in france

lildanvers: ah ok

lildanvers: bring some cannoli 

tattooedbitch: we're gonna be gone for like 3 more weeks and France isn't known for cannoli

tattooedbitch: also you can fly?????

lildanvers: I'M LAZY

tattooedbitch: yeah and that's a first

lildanvers: how are you a mom

tattooedbitch: I question that everyday

demonspawn: I don't know whether I should be offended or

iriswestallen: be thankful

tattooedbitch: now I don't know if I should be offended

lilrickie: he gets his cluelessness from you

tattooedbitch: dick

dickthedick: yes?

lilrickie: oh e1 twin

dickthedick: this is weird

lilrickie: do we look the same?

emikoqueen: no

emikoqueen: dick is a nerd

dickthedick: HEY

emikoqueen: and rick just looks like a dick

lilrickie: like the actual penis or like an asshole?

emikoqueen: what do you THINK

lilrickie: RUDE

tattooedbitch: alright we off again see ya

lildanvers: byyyye

iriswestallen: send more pics!

olliequeen: also if you'd like to send your baby gifts please send them to john! he is coming over in a few days

iriswestallen: shhhhh soccer is on

constantine: you mean football?

brucieboy: stupid americans

iriswestallen: I don't care about the names I just care that the US kick the Netherlands' asses

constantine: I stopped caring after they beat England

olliequeen: me and felicity are watching rn!

dickthedick: I wonder if the game results the same way on both earths

directordanvers: we'll find out cus maggie won't shut up about it

detectivesawyer: ok rude

detectivesawyer: ALSO I'M ANGRY THAT ALI AND ASHLYN WON'T GET TO BE ON THE FIELD TOGETHER

olliequeen: me too!

olliequeen: like jillian PUT ASHLYN IN FOR 2 SECONDS

detectivesawyer: I mean I get the whole goalkeeper thing but COME ON

olliequeen: wait,,, jax said her and emiko were in france

detectivesawyer: IF THEY'RE AT THE GAME I'M GONNA MURDER

detectivesawyer: JUDITH JACKSON DANVERS WHERE IS YOUR EXACT FUCKING LOCATION

olliequeen: DROP YOUR LOCATION

tattooedbitch: how'd you fucking know

detectivesawyer: I'm a detective, I detect

olliequeen: also imma be even angrier if you know any of the players

tattooedbitch: I know one of the Netherlands players

tattooedbitch: THROUGH HER HUSBAND THOUGH

olliequeen: still mad!

tattooedbitch: I've never heard a peep about football from any of you except Emiko so screw you

iriswestallen: ok fair 

norawestallen: wow they're on number 8 right?

tattooedbitch: WHAT

iriswestallen: HUH

olliequeen: EIGHT

detectivesawyer: PARDON

norawestallen: and that's why I try not to get involved with 2k19 stuff

iriswestallen: UH UH YOU COME BACK AND EXPLAIN 

olliequeen: AMERICA EXPLAIN

dreamer: I see you oliver, I see you

olliequeen: 👀👍

saralance: for the sake of the timeline please don't explain!

iriswestallen: PUH LEASE Y'ALL HAVE A JOB OF RUINING IT

saralance: are you pregnant?

norawestallen: no it should be a couple more months

barryallen: MONTHS

iriswestallen: THIS YEAR??????

saralance: I give up

directordanvers: maggie uhhh I'm coming home be prepared?

detectivesawyer: but the game is on!

iriswestallen: 👀

saralance: ou tea

olliequeen: don't give alex sass you're probably getting some!

sassysiren: where's oliver and what have you done with him

olliequeen: what I have barely anything to do

sassysiren: felicity are you being fed?

felicitysmoak: yes!

saralance: lmaooo that's how ollie shuts her up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi guys,,,, I'm off my mental health break and I'm ready to keep writing. I've finally started Good Omens and I'm re-watching Eureka for the billionth time and I'm surprised that I haven't referenced them in this chapter or the start of the next chapter(a new change in me lmao) anyways if y'all wanna chat feel free to leave a comment or message me on Tumblr or Twitter  
> @ blue-impulse   
> @ mafiadaddygully
> 
> thanks for reading!


	25. gays win

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oliver has learned! + a surprise

iriswestallen: BACK TO BACK CHAMPS BABY

felicitysmoak: oliver stop yelling you're gonna wake the baby

olliequeen: she's in your stomach????

felicitysmoak: WATCH YOUR MOUTH

tattooedbitch: someone's hormonal

felicitysmoak: I'll beat your ass

tattooedbitch: I survived Talia when she was pregnant, it'll be like handling a fly with you

mommad: apologize

tattooedbitch: why

mommad: judith

tattooedbitch: okay OKAY I'M SORRY FELICITY

felicitysmoak: apology not accepted

tattooedbitch: lemme guess you want food

felicitysmoak: I've already added the list to the notes in your phone

tattooedbitch: did you hack my phone???

felicitysmoak: yes

felicitysmoak: also nice nudes

tattooedbitch: WHY'D YOU LOOK IN MY GALLERY

emikoqueen: HEY THOSE AREN'T FOR YOU

iriswestallen: send them

barryallen: IRIS

iriswestallen: yes there are children here but she'll just pm me them

barryallen: STILL BAD

olliequeen: where's maggie? she should be celebrating the win

dovenotthesoap: remember she was gonna get laid

olliequeen: oh yeah

mommad: actually no

dovenotthesoap: then what???

mommad: alex forgot that she applied for adoption for this one child

mommad: and they accepted her application

saralance: WHAT

demonspawn: I'm gonna have a cousin????

mommad: that's why her and maggie needed to talk

sassysiren: why is everyone having kids this year what the fuck

felicitysmoaks: it's like the universe needs it

brainy: 👀

saralance: IF YOU AIN'T GONNA EXPLAIN STOP SENDING MIXED SIGNALS BRAINY

dreamer: DON'T BULLY MY BOYFRIEND

sassysiren: woah

olliequeen: yes another ship!!!

directorsharpe: oliver you've changed

olliequeen: we been knew

olliequeen: anyways gals pals and nonbinary pals what's the ship name

jasontheman: is oliver good?

brucieboy: he's- a queen

olliequeen: y'all are being quite rude

olliequeen: I am going for a jog

arsenal: ew

saralance: working out? never heard of her

directorsharpe: a lie

dreamer: a fib

iriswestallen: get the fuck out of my crib

dreamer: I read that in a sing-song voice and you literally need a certain speed for that line to rhyme

iriswestallen: it's weird

orphan: y'all are weird

demonspawn: omg she speaks!

orphan: shut up dragon boy

lilrickie: get back to school

orphan: it's literally summer

lilrickie: fair

sassysiren: does this chat ever stay on track?

iriswestallen: no

iriswestallen: but I will gladly introduce a new topic

iriswestallen: has anyone watched euphoria on hbo?????

lildanvers: is that the extremely pornographic highschool show with zendaya that jax and lena are obsessed with 

iriswestallen: yes!!!

thegoodone: I love that show!

iriswestallen: who's your favorite character?

thegoodone: jules!! 

dreamer: never heard of it

iriswestallen: well on the show zendaya is in love with this cute trans girl WHO IS ALSO PLAYED BY A TRANS ACTRESS

dreamer: I'M GOING TO BINGE

iriswestallen: the next ep comes on tonight

dreamer: I might be able to catch up for tonight

iriswestallen: do it!

dreamer: BYe

lildanvers: she'll get through one episode before a crime

thegoodone: don't jinx her kar

iriswestallen: yeah!

barryallen: can we please put our phones down I've been trying to get your attention for like 5 minutes now 

lildanvers: ok

saralance: lmaooo

sassysiren: why is it suddenly once the summer comes we barely have any problems?

zarilovescharlie: our writers are on vacation

sassysiren: what the fuck

zarilovescharlie: okay hear me out

zarilovescharlie: so there are multiple universes out there, what if in one of them, we're tv show characters

sassysiren: like the avengers or something

zarilovescharlie: exactly!!

zarilovescharlie: and what if this groupchat is just a fanfic on some website

orphan: like ao3?

zarilovescharlie: yes!

ciscoramon: don't worry, I'm already on it

olliequeen: what about nia's handy dandy robot boyfriend 

brainy: what would you like?

zarilovescharlie: can you find other universes?

brainy: only a few, but we have to be careful of the fourth wall.

zarilovescharlie: FIND US

brainy: okay give me a few minutes to compute

brucieboy: are you doing a ritual

olliequeen: yes but shut up

brainy: there is one universe that matches your wishes

zarilovescharlie: and???

brainy: it is where there are no superheroes

zarilovescharlie: BUMMER

brainy: there is marvel comics, but also dc comics

olliequeen: dc? what the fuck is a dc

brainy: according to the log, it is just like marvel except…..

saralance: I'M SUDDENLY INTERESTED

zarilovescharlie: SAYYY IT

brainy: we are comic book characters

zarilovescharlie: KNEW IT

brainy: some of us were just made for tv

brainy: jax doesn't even exist?

tattooedbitch: what the fuck dawg

tattooedbitch: that ain't cool

brainy: you are an OC in a "chatfic"

tattooedbitch: who created me???

brainy: someone by the name of gully

zarilovescharlie: what kinda name is that

saralance: wait what is the status of the US

brainy: there are many web complaints about the president

brucieboy: who's the president?

brainy: his name is donald trump

olliequeen: THE REALITY BILLIONAIRE?

brainy: correct

olliequeen: BRB GONNA BARF

mommad: that man sexually assaulted women in my time

saralance: who would elect him

iriswestallen: fucking white people

brainy: kanye west is among the avid supporters

olliequeen sent a video [vf2:ewmeme]

iriswestallen: MEEE

brainy: I cannot say anymore

tattooedbitch: somewhere out there I'm just a created character in some nobody's fic huh

iriswestallen: they might not be a nobody!

zarilovescharlie: she's just depressed because she knows she's not real somewhere 

lildanvers: but you're real in this universe, and all that matters is that you're you, and we all love you

zarilovescharlie: yeah!

olliequeen: kara's in speech mode again

lildanvers: I'm hyper!

thegoodone: sadly

thegoodone: also emiko go get your girlfriend

emikoqueen: someone's getting cuddles

sassysiren: did you just expose yourself?

emikoqueen: yes

sassysiren: was it worth it?

emikoqueen: yes

tattooedbitch: I'm changing my looks and moving to arkansas

dreamer: I am confusion! Why is this one Kan-sas but this one is not Ar-kan-sas?  
AMERICA EXPLAIN! EXPLAIN! WHAT DO YOU MEAN IT'S AR-KAN-SAW?

tattooedbitch: bitch DID YOU TYPE THAT WHOLE THING OUT

dreamer: YES AND IT WAS WORTH IT 

olliequeen: love that vine

dreamer: i love you oliver

olliequeen: sorry but I'm a married man

dreamer: YOU'RE LIKE 20 YEARS OLDER THAN ME

olliequeen: do you think I'm 40????

dreamer: aren't you?

olliequeen: I'M 38

lildanvers: wait u are

olliequeen: yeah

lildanvers: YOU'RE AN OLD MAAAAAAN

manofsteel: felt that

mommad: 🤦

manofsteel: sorry eliza

lildanvers: sorry mom

saralance: wait we have enough moms to make a gc

lildanvers: YES

felicitysmoak: I am in favor of making it I'm bored

 

felicitysmoak created the group Masked Moms and added iriswestallen, mommad, thebetterlane, and tattooedbitch to the chat

 

tattooedbitch: is that the best name you could come up with?

felicitysmoak: yes

tattooedbitch: also can I add a mom

felicitysmoak: sure

tattooedbitch added babskeene

babskeene: FINALLY I'M APPRECIATED

iriswestallen: that's what we're here for!

babskeene: disabled kid squad anyone?

thebetterlane: or just plain not normal kid squad

iriswestallen: superpowered kids squad!!!

thebetterlane: mine was literally just born like 4 months ago now he's 15

babskeene: wait lois????

thebetterlane: BARBARA?

tattooedbitch: took you two long enough

babskeene: I was like idk these people but never mind!

iriswestallen: so are you from earth 38 or earth 17?

babskeene: I'm from earth 38 but I live on 17 currently

babskeene: after barbara got paralyzed her father found it best that we move

tattooedbitch: thus leaving me and dami alone

mommad: but you found us in the process!

tattooedbitch: yes!

babskeene: wait jax this is your mom????

mommad: the one and only!

babskeene: omg

tattoedbich: you sound like a teenager

babskeene: im old enough to be your mom

tattooedbitch: only two of you here are old enough to be my mom

felicitysmoak: fair point

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I know y'all hating me rn for not posting for like 2 weeks but I swear I'm not dead. Also I'm not sure if anyone even reads anymore??? I understand if y'all stopped because I don't constantly post but I'm really trying. I just got a job and I also started taking classes as military prep so I only have a couple hours and half the time I'm either too tired or on writers block. I will try and get another chapter out this week and hopefully it's more inclusive on the characters. but if you guys are reading PLEASE COMMENT so I know I still have you're attention! I don't even know if I should continue if no one is even reading anymore. anyways peace and see y'all soon!


	26. future baby chat is a mood

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> i have new oc's,,,, I'm so sorry

2 weeks later

 

alex to jax (messenger)

 

alex: where are you and emiko?

jax: we've been in japan for a couple days, why what's up?

alex: well you remember how I applied for adoption?

jax: yeah

alex: well I was approved, aaaand well maggie wants to do this with me

jax: ALEX THAT'S GREAT

jax: I'M SO PROUD OF YOU

alex: woah woah you're a lot more chill abt this

jax: wdym

alex: kara still doesn't like that fact that maggie and I are back together

jax: did her and maggie have problems or something 

alex: yeah back when we were dating and it got worse when we broke up

jax: maybe once things settle she'll change her point of view?

alex: I hope

jax: alex, you should be worrying about yourself and not about what everyone else thinks

alex: I could say the same for you

jax: oh you sassing me now?

alex: no lol just hitting you back

jax: I'll talk to emiko tonight and see if we can finish up this week then come home

alex: you don't have to

jax: you're my sister, I gotta try to be there for you're big life moments

alex: I love you jax

jax: I love you too!

 

arrowverse chat

 

lildanvers: hey batman is back

brucieboy: I'm home???

lildanvers: no our batman

olliequeen: you mean bruce?

lildanvers: my bad I'm so used to calling him batman

demonspawn: wait what

lilrickie: BRUCE IS BACK????

olliequeen: is it like a problem or???

timmytwoknives: WE CAN'T LET JAX KNOW

lildanvers: well if she checks the news

lilrickie: PREGNANT HACKER LADY

felicitysmoak: das me!

lilrickie: prevent jax from seeing the US news

felicitysmoak: okie dokie

emikoqueen: what's going on

timmytwoknives: FUCK

lilrickie: now listen here, and listen very closely

emikoqueen: should I be worried?

lilrickie: shut up and listen

lilrickie: you can't say ANYTHING about the chat to jax, and take her attention from her phone

emikoqueen: why???

lilrickie: bruce is back in town, and you know what she'll do

emikoqueen: I can't keep things from her

timmytwoknives: PLEASE

emikoqueen: I'm too against thisssss

lilrickie: where is she right now?

emikoqueen: the shower

sassysiren: SEDUCE HER

demonspawn: my fucking eyes

sassysiren: shhhhhh

emikoqueen: she's gonna fucking kill me

olliequeen: good luck soldier

directordanvers: I salute you for this

generallane: POPCORN WORTHY

vasquez: 20 bucks jax won't freak out on her

emikoqueen: *salutes*

saralance: gone too soon

emikoqueen: not yet 

sassysiren: she wimped out

emikoqueen: no I fell on my ass trying to take off my pants

sassysiren: ASDHFHAKAKAJA

felicitysmoak: oooohhhh a camera!

felicitysmoak: I will now make a montage of this to bust down thotiana

emikoqueen: DID YOU HACK THE CAMERA IN OUR ROOM

felicitysmoak: BUST DOWN THOTIANA

generallane: pls share

felicitysmoak: no can do

felicitysmoak: WAIT EARTH 38 BATMAN LOOKS LIKE EDWARD

lildanvers: who

felicitysmoak: from twilight????

lilrickie: don't compare that beauty with this rat

iriswestallen: wait send a pic 

felicitysmoak sent a photo [cmr:vamptobat]

brucieboy: he looks nothing like me

brainy: you don't always look like your other earth counterparts

brucieboy: ah

brucieboy: also I agree

felicitysmoak: hey rick did you guys ever play baseball in the rain with super massive black hole on loop

lilrickie: what?? no

felicitysmoak: you missed out on the opportunity

lilrickie: I am confusion

dreamer: 👀

iriswestallen: DON'T YOU DARE

felicitysmoak: old meme

dreamer: ouch

dreamer: also where's my meme girl

norawestallen: lurking

saralance: what else is new

norawestallen: I ss this chat a lot omg

felicitysmoak: why???

sassysiren: we have content ofc she'll ss

norawestallen: actually I send it to the future chat

iriswestallen: the what???

sassysiren: what's that mean

norawestallen: oh it's just all your ki-

brainy: KILLER MEME MOMENTS STORED FOR SAFEKEEPING

caitlinsnow: was she gonna say kids??

norawestallen: and this is why I'm always lurking

saralance: hey get your ass back here

dreamer: yeah we need deets

norawestallen: sorry brainy might try and hurt me if I say more

iriswestallen: god damnit I wanted tea

 

future baby chat

 

norawestallen sent a photo [cmr: 2k19AC]

demonking: you're gonna get everyone in this chat except me, mia, conner, john and conner deleted from the universe

computergirl: deleted??? dami you good?

demonking: shut up mia

manofsteel.2: chill out damian

birdgirl: hey that's my mom!

norawestallen: your other mom is rarely in the chat 

birdgirl: she isn't a big social type, she's probably working, or just lurking

jaimerose: oh so just like nora

norawestallen: I lurk in that chat not this!

witchbaby: ehhhh debatable 

demonking: get back to class!

witchbaby: but it's soooooo boring

computergirl: I was told to "stay in base" fuck that

connerhawk: listen to dinah!

birdgirl: don't listen to aunt dinah

connerhawk: have I mentioned how weird the names are here

manofsteel.2: no shit

birdgirl: I wasn't named after dinah I was named after dinah

witchbaby: that wasn't confusing at all

demonking: I remember during the wedding the priest was so fucking done after he saw that there are two dinah's marrying eachother

birdgirl: lmaooo

birdgirl: that's aunt laurel's fault for marrying someone with the same name as her mother

witchbaby: I got stuck with fucking elizabeth

demonking: don't diss grandmas name

witchbaby: she goes by eliza not elizabeth!

jdjr: why are you all always this active

connerhawk: they're all over the place today

witchbaby: how do you two act so much alike yet you both clash every 2 seconds

jdjr: it's the definition of siblings idk🤷

demonking: me and ellie are nothing alike

witchbaby: true

gaysuit: sometimes you take after one parent and your sibling takes after the other

computergirl: nerd

gaysuit: how rude

birdgirl: well we all know who takes after who here that's for sure

bettercalldon: not this again

sawyer: I'm at school can y'all chill

witchbaby: don't be a goodie tissues

sawyer: I am one and I'm proud!

sawyer: also I'm telling my mom

witchbaby: dilligaf

computergirl: I felt that

gaysuit: me too

demonking: great now that's all I'll hear for the rest of my shift

witchbaby: it only counts if it's in a country sing song voice

sawyer: screenshotted

witchbaby: which mom are you telling

sawyer: your aunt

witchbaby: NO PLEASE HER AND MY MOM AGREE ON EVERYTHING

sawyer: SUFFER

jaimerose: y'all are children

witchbaby: you're two years older than me

jaimerose: and I'm an adult

witchbaby: what the fuuuuuck

birdgirl: cousins are so annoying

soundthesiren: I agree

birdgirl: fuck you

soundthesiren: 🙄

gaysuit: hey look emo boy is back from the police station

soundthesiren: they weren't supposed to KNOW THAT

birdgirl: tea tea TEA

witchbaby: great you lost all the weed didn't you?

soundthesiren: ……

witchbaby: what the fuck quinn 

computergirl: ah yes trouble and dumb trouble are back together

soundthesiren: hey I'm not that dumb!

 

arrowverse chat

 

tattooedbitch: what the fuck did you put my girlfriend up to

felicitysmoak: EMIKO

emikoqueen: I fucking TRIED 

tattooedbitch: I can READ MINDS DUMBASSES

lilrickie: eye-

iriswestallen: RICK YOU LITERALLY GREW UP WITH HER AND YOU JUST FORGOT TO MENTION THAT?????

iriswestallen: and damian,,,, SHE'S YOUR MOTHER

demonspawn: I'm literally dumb

tattooedbitch: now what is it

tattooedbitch: ya'll find out you missed my birthday?

tattooedbitch: oh no alex did you not get the kid????

directordanvers: no it's not that

tattooedbitch: then what

sassysiren: tell her kara

lildanvers: why me????

sassysiren: you said it first!!!!

lildanvers: no

lilrickie: bruce is back in gotham

tattooedbitch: ..

tattooedbitch: what?

tattooedbitch: did I smoke a little too much?

tattooedbitch: i

tattooedbitch: he can't be

tattooedbitch: he-

lilrickie: and this is why she wasn't to know

emikoqueen: I- I've never seen her like this

demonspawn: are you guys coming home soon?

emikoqueen: yes

emikoqueen: I think I'm gonna call for the plane now

lilrickie: I think it's safe if you jax and damian come here

emikoqueen: jax thinks so too

sassysiren: jax you're a powerful witch, why won't you kill him?

lilrickie: she'd gladly do it, but she knows who he's after

olliequeen: why would he be after damian if he left in the first place?

lilrickie: he didn't just leave, he came back and killed talia when she was giving birth. he just wants the job finished.

tattooedbitch: and I have growing suspicions that he has things to do with the things in my past and he's planning something now

lildanvers: does he know about earth 17?

tattooedbitch: no

tattooedbitch: and no mentioning it either

directordanvers: stay safe

tattooedbitch: we'll try

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's late and I just finished this to get it posted, a wee bit rushed but I'm tired. might take it down tomorrow to rework it when I'm not fueled by caffeine and my spotify playlist(I can only write whe listening to music).
> 
> if you wanna talk my tumblr is @ blue-impulse (ya'll already know)  
> also my Twitter is @ mafiadaddygully  
> mwah mwah


	27. future babies

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> idek anymore

felicitysmoak: wow we love a dramatic story

olliequeen: that's the life we live

sassysiren: sounds about right

detectivesawyer: wait does bruce know about jax's family? since he's a public figure wouldn't he be able to easily find out everything she's done for the past what 15 years and where and what she's doing now?

felicitysmoak: good point…

tattooedbitch: right now I'm doing this for my son, but if he goes for my other family, he's dead

tattooedbitch: no cap

directordanvers: don't worry we'll watch his movements for now

lildanvers: I mean I am made of steel too

thegoodone: yeah you are :)

lildanvers: :)

tattooedbitch: what if he has kryptonite?

thegoodone: then I'll make a suit special for kara

tattooedbitch: sorry for throwing this at y'all I'm stressing rn and I just need to make everything clear 

directordanvers: it's okay jax

lildanvers: we understand

tattooedbitch: I'm gonna go eat dinner talk to ya'll later

lildanvers: love you!

tattooedbitch: mwah

thegoodone: poor jax

saralance: next thing we know the league could be after her too

olliequeen: ugh don't remind me

speedyqueen: y'all remember the last time they came after me

saralance: yeah don't remind me

olliequeen: yeah please

barryallen: did I know you when whatever this happened?

olliequeen: you were here for laurel's death but not sara's death/resurrection

barryallen: I don't even think I had my speed

ciscoramon: yeah I don't think you did

dreamer: that was a dramatic description

lildanvers: shouldn't you be on crime watch

norawestallen: she's probably pulling a spiderman by sitting on the edge of a building and eating food

dreamer: NORA

norawestallen: lmaooo

lildanvers: hey I taught her that!

thegoodone: and spiderman taught you that

greatdetectiveralph: what are you eating 

dreamer: finally a question I can answer

dreamer: five guys

greatdetectiveralph: what's that?

dreamer: YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT FIVE GUYS IS

ciscoramon: is it like big belly burger

dreamer: what's that

barryallen: YOU DON'T HAVE BIG BELLY BURGER?????

lildanvers: we do but she hasn't been on the west coast long enough

directordanvers: she flipped out when she found out that we don't have wawa

dreamer: that was the worst day of my life!

emikoqueen: I've had all of those and can confirm, I can't stop eating

emikoqueen: I love wawa the most tho

dreamer: east coast cheeeeck

directorsharpe: yesss

saralance: I forgot that you're from pittsburgh

olliequeen: being a good partner 101

saralance: it's one of the bad things about me

directorsharpe: ****the only

saralance: idk whether to be offended or glad

felicitysmoak: she lowkey roasted you

saralance: my baby tried💞💞💞💞

directorsharpe: ❤

 

future babies

jdjr: hey damian since your mom has died many times I have a few questions

demonking: shhhhh

jdjr: ?

demonking: I'm older than you thus shhhhh

gaysuit: old man

demonking: I'm one year older than you

computergirl: didn't you two bang or something

witchbaby: lmaoo exposed

gaysuit: he just can't resist my charm what can I say

norawestallen: you are soooo oliver's kid

gaysuit: I get that a lot

computergirl: yet you act so much like mom

gaysuit: I get that a lot too

jdjr: I'm still confused

ladyofthehawks: and I find your confusion entertaining

demonking: oh great evil twin #2 is back

ladyofthehawks: oh shut up damian

ladyofthehawks: I chose to go to bootcamp

soundthesiren: and I politely declined

ladyofthehawks: you had a temper tantrum and promised not to get in trouble with the cops

ladyofthehawks: btw, I heard mom talking to john about getting you sent to a military school

jdjr: oh yeah I heard that convo too, didn't my dad mention river-rock academy?

ladyofthehawks: yeah I think he did

soundthesiren: OH PLEASE NO

soundthesiren: they're the extremely bad kids! I only have possession charges I'm too good for that!!

ladyofthehawks: they're marine kids, you'll be fine

witchbaby: mom said that they're the worst branch

ladyofthehawks: quinn doesn't need to know

soundthesiren: I CAN READ YOU KNOW

ladyofthehawks: can you?

soundthesiren: fair

witchbaby: wait wasn't dinah a marine

ladyofthehawks: yup

witchbaby: knew it

ladyofthehawks: and jax is jag?

demonking: she was

demonking: after ellie was born she got a job offer to lead this military criminal defense unit and she took it, she's been there ever since

jdjr: the ncis type thing?

demonking: oh great you call it that too, I thought you'd have more respect

connerhawk: he does but he doesn't show it

jdjr: don't expose me

birdgirl: why do we always get off topic

norawestallen sent a screenshot [cmr:arrowversechats]

birdgirl: lmao I guess I am like my mom

jdjr: which one

jdjr: literally half of you have lesbian moms how can we tell which mom y'all are talking about

witchbaby: damn you right

birdgirl: my mom is bi

ladyofthehawks: both of mine are bi

jdjr: ok rephrase, most of you have two moms

sawyer: I can tell that this is the main group

 

arrowverse chats

 

detectivesawyer: the main group is inactive? wtf

wondergirl: ig they have better things to do

dovenotthesoap: you have better things to do

dreamer: cough COUGH

wondergirl: I'm actually driving to work

dovenotthesoap: she left me 10 minutes ago and I've never been lonelier

kitty: just use a toy

olliequeen: what the fuck did I walk into

brucieboy: LANGUAGE

hornydevil: do I need to send a present? ;)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hola folks! there will no longer be updates until the seasons start back up in october! I'm starting to get bored with this and I know all of you are too so I thought it'd be best if I just wait for more content. anyways if ya'll wanna talk or hear me complain hmu on Twitter @ mafiadaddygully !


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